Love Her!!

he's fighting a beautiful buff lady. her shirt gets ripped and she's left in her slutty little tank top. "come on," you think. "why is the woman always wearing sexier things than her male counterparts." but fear not. now HE takes off his shirt and he's left in HIS slutty little tank top. equality. and then they kiss

the vague sexuality of YD

I was thinking about Young Dracula and things I could talk about... so I took a look at the episodes and was once again reminded of how it really toed that line between being a children's show and something more. As a kid, you're not really noticing it, but as an adult... it makes you sad they couldn't openly do more stuff like:

I mean, it's seemingly apparent that Vlad and Ingrid are aware and unfazed by their parents' sex life. He walks in on this and is mildly annoyed because of the failed plan, and she's not bothered by having to photograph them (for blackmail purposes). Plus:

If this was a teen show, I wouldn't have batted an eye but the fact that I was in primary school watching these two casually discuss their parents having sex and then Vlad suggesting Magda had sex with Patrick and that's his baby, not their father's... it's a lot lmao.

It's not even that. There are moments throughout the entire show, like the Count pinching Mina's ass when he's in Eric's body, OR the "lock up your daughters" about Boris. There are so many, I'd be here all day. It's why I get ahead of myself, like in Season 3, I always expect Ingrid and Bertrand to just GO AT IT.

Like, what the fuck is this, CBBC? They have better tension than some couples in adult shows and I'm just supposed to forget about them? Without even one kiss scene? I was truly robbed. They kinda disintegrated in Season 4, but the enemies-who-fuck thing they had going on in Season 3 is unmatched. After losing Will, the love of her life, Ingrid deserved to have a hot thing with Bertrand, dammit!

I even read too much into scenes like this:

I can't have been the only one who thought (as wrong as it is because it's her father saying it) that Adze was going to enter the show and straight up seduce Vlad. How else is she supposed to "persuade" a blood-free, already-in-love guy to do whatever she wants? There's even a scene later that season where Ramanga encourages her to "play" with Vlad on the wedding night before killing him. What does that mean? Other than what I'm imagining? Torture? Because the implications kinda overpower that.

Vlad and Erin, after he bit her, was a trip too. They became a lot more... charged. Their exchange and back and forth when he calls her out on biting breathers and catches her with Bertrand...

It obviously doesn't scream "sexual tension". I don't think their relationship does in general, but with the extra vampirism involved and the possessiveness that comes with Vlad biting Erin and making her a vampire, and the "hatred" festering... it does create some, shall I say, questionable moments like the one above, where I'm like "am I supposed to be feeling like they'll start violently making out, where in the midst of it, Vlad is saying she is his and Erin is saying that she hates him".

Like, half of these two interactions was, yeah, about him being paranoid and pressured because of the peace treaty. But like I pointed out in that other scene, Vlad seems to grow even more irritated by finding her stood close to Bertrand, tucked away in Malik's room, all alone together. Hence why he's used the choice words of "cosy little chats" here, like an overly jealous, paranoid husband. It gave off the same vibes as him saying "I know you're into Malik, maybe you're with Bertrand too, since you hate me so much".

This scene also. It intrigued me because Vlad was showing that possessiveness for the first time. We've seen him get possessive over his title and status as the Chosen One and as the Count's favourite child, but never over a person, never over Erin. And I just loved it.

It showed the darkness and the sexuality of vampires, and how far Vlad is pushed into that when it came to the idea of losing Erin. I think, before, when he hadn't absorbed the evil reflections, he would have maybe scoffed at the idea of a macho showdown for a girl. But he's dead serious, taking in Bertrand's advice, like "yeah, if I kill Malik, it'll turn her on and she'll be all over me and I'll win her back".

It's all interesting, is all. I feel as though the vagueness of sexuality in YD served its purpose enough, but it would've been cool to have seen a more adult portrayal (like I always say) because of the lack of blood and gore, and the lack of open sexuality that naturally comes with being an immortal, supposedly evil supernatural creature. I always picture Ingrid and Bertrand getting hot and steamy, or Bad Vlad being caught in the bathroom with piles of bodies (which the Count and Renfield have to dispose of and come up with a cover story). Stuff to really make me believe they're adults and vampires.

I saw a comment on tiktok before watching todays episode of Wolfpack and someone was like “I used to really like Harlan but what he did was inexcusable” and I was worried because I really like Harlan (love the entire pack) and then I watched and I burst out laughing when I realized the “inexcusable” thing he did was have sex with some random girls boyfriend in her house. He’s funny, mean, and gay and you think I’m gonna root against him? 🤨

Okay but think of the comedic potential of the Leverage OT3 having been together for years by the time of Redemption, and at one point the others find out.

Breanna would be like "oh my god how did I not see that". Sophie would go "oh that explains a lot of things". (And yeah, it would also be on board for her to know, but one, it's been established that unconventional relationships are kind of a blind spot for her, and two, Parker is weird enough and Eliot's act is good enough that it would help throw her off the scent.)

(Harry wouldn't care much probably.)

And the possibilities of how it could happen. Like. Hardison is up in space, Eliot and Parker are doing something for a con, they see someone coming, Parker is like "quick, let's make out", and throws herself on Eliot. Eliot is like "no, not the lips", but he goes along with it, and then when they're in the clear, he's like "why do you always bite my lips? you didn't have to bite my lips", to which Parker replies "I was playing a character. Clara is a lip biter", and Eliot goes on an angry rant about the whole thing, but also the others overhear it, and Breanna checks in like "Eliot always says it? how often do you guys make out on cons?" and Parker goes "Eliot's not talking about the cons."

OR Parker is upset by something, and leaves the room, and Eliot goes after her, and when he doesn't resurface for a while Breanna goes after him, and they're kissing, and Eliot shouts at her to get out, but she's like "Okay. This is not cool. Eliot, you're super scary and I can see you're pissed at me right now, but I gotta call Hardison," and they're both like no, you don't have to do that, but he's already on call, and Breanna tells him everything. Eliot is facepalming and sighing the whole time. Parker is just like "what? they had to find out eventually." And then Breanna finishes, everyone is dead silent, waiting for his reaction, and Hardison is like "So y'all wasted my time with this? [five-minute rant about how busy he is]" Breanna is flabbergasted. "So Eliot makes out with your girlfriend and that's your reaction?" So Hardison just goes "Damn sis I better damn hope that when my girlfriend is upset our boyfriend would go and comfort him. Get yo act together." He hangs up, camera cuts to Breana, her face frozen while trying to process the information. Then she just goes "HOLY SH-" [commercial break]

The way that Grover keeps saying he's 24 when we know full well that satyr's age half as fast as humans.

Can we take a moment for Grover, because at the mental age of 12, he's given charge of another person's life, and his only job is to protect him. He swears to keep him safe and keep him alive. He's failed in the past and that lurks in every dangerous situation they encounter. He keeps bringing up that he's 24 maybe for comedic relief or maybe to remind himself he's had 24 years of world experience, even if he just feels like an overwhelmed 12-year-old, placed in charge of two danger-prone kids who keep trying to sacrifice themselves for each other, on a quest doomed to fail?

The satyrs have been protectors for decades, but It just occurred to me that they're basically just kids trying to protect kids from monsters they probably wouldn't be able to beat.

Seriously though, Leverage Redemption, when the hell is Tara Cole making an appearance? She better be coming in season two and I better get some quality Tara roasting the shit out of Harry for his lackluster theif skills and the fact that he used to be a lawyer and Tara being Breanna's vodka aunt who only shows up on holidays with outlandish stories about her torrid international affairs and special expensive gifts that are 100% stolen and I better get some quality sexual tension between her and Sophie

I want Tara to show up and reveal she's become a den mother for one of the Leverage International teams and it's like her own personal version of The Ocean's 8 team full of badass theif ladies and yes they are gay

Leverage Redmption hire me as a writer I already have the episode in my mind I'll do it for free, just please bring back my sarcastic jaded Quantico trained crime wife please

Okay, somebody can correct me if I'm wrong- but at the end of The Nigerian Job, when the team was convincing Nate that they should keep doing what they did- Eliot's whole argument was Nate. Nate falling apart. Nate needing the chance. Nate not being able to walk away. Nate.

Then, suddenly Eliot became the whole team's body guard. (Something he's grunt and gruffed about.) Yet. Yet. Somewhere (I say it was The Iceman Job and The Inside Job,) Eliot's brain switched from protecting the team to protecting Hardison and Parker. (Again correct me if I'm wrong.) Suddenly his job became more about having Hardison and Parker's back than having Nate's back. Maybe I'm the only one whose noticed- but Eliot become more softer with both Hardison and Parker after those particular jobs. Sure he keeps that gruff, sarcastic wit about him but there's often tones of... protectivness(?) when he interacts with them. Almost like he's telling other people around them- whose in ear shot- that Hardison and Parker are his. Like he's possessive.

Now, I'm not saying Eliot just stops caring about the rest of the team. I mean- he beats up Sterling for Nate and in Redemption Eliot is following Sophie around a handful of times. Their are even times where he has Breanna's back and Harry's. But he seems to treat those situations like a case. He compartmentalizes those situations. With Hardison and Parker- he doesn't. It's like his brain won't let him. He sees Hardison and Parker and it's like- all bets are off.

And on the flip side- has anyone noticed that Parker and Hardison seem to be the only ones that know how to... defuse (is that the right word?) Eliot? Like even Maria couldn't get Eliot to relax in The Hurrican Job. (Of course that's probably because Eliot was hiding who he was to her.) But Eliot always seems to be more relaxed when he's around those two.

In The Iceman Job after when Hardison tries to hug him? Eliot wasn't really fighting it. (I would know- I do that to my brother ALL the time when he tries to hug me.) In The Inside Job- when Eliot went to attack that employee- Parker stopped him. In The Double-Edge Sword Job, when Eliot is furious because an abusive ex comes after a women that they tried to hide- it's Parker that calms him down. It's Hardison who pays off the bartender when Eliot attacks Sterling. It's Parker who is always by his side or close to it. It's Parker who trusts Eliot when their in the back of the van with Vance. (Yes, Parker trusts Hardison too, but Hardison is a hacker- not a protector.) It's Eliot who Hardison listens to when he's not confident. It's Eliot who grabs Hardison from the coffin. It's Eliot who crouchs behind Hardison as Parker flips around him. It's Eliot whose hands are shaking when he they have half a second on a bomb.

Eliot Spencer is Hardison's and Parkers. They own him. In the same way Hardison and Parker are his. He owns them. (Does that make sense?)

For the record- I don't know why I'm pointing all of this out. It's just interesting to me... I guess.