Sad Rajma Chawal.....

m

mango (derogatory)

people really measure out their spices? you’re really going to take out your little ¼ teaspoon? you’re afraid your food is going to taste too good?

Y/N, typing: "She knew it was wrong to want someone this much, let alone look at them. He was the God of Mischief, and she knew very well his reputation as the Slivertongue Heartbreaker-"

Loki: No one calls me that.

Y/N: [screams as she turns around to face Loki] C-C-Calls you what?

Loki: If you're going to write fanfiction about me behind my back, you should at least give roughly accurate details.

Y/N: W-What?

Loki, sitting beside you: [hitting the backspace button] "Reputation", my ass. It was more of a rumor that spread through the realm.

Y/N: Loki, what are you doing-

Loki: [typing at a quick speed for a God who doesn't use technology, reading it out loud] "She knew of the stories of how he had bed many a woman through the years."

Y/N: Wh-WHAT

Loki: [typing even faster, ignoring your confusion] "She knew there were tons of women around the universe, not just the world. She had resigned to the thought that she had no chance against the girls on their knees for him."

Y/N: I-I-I...

Loki: [taking a glance at you]

Y/N: [looks away]

Loki: [glances back at the screen]

Loki: [typing] "But little did she know, for him, Loki only had eyes for her."

Y/N: [looks up, eyes widening]

Loki: [activates voice typing, turning to face you] And he always had.

Loki: From the moment he graced his eyes on her, the moment he heard her laugh, the moment she smiled, the moment she had stolen his heart.

Loki: And to him, it was love.

Loki: Unlike the way some would describe the feeling, his world didn't slow down.

Loki: It kept on spinning and spinning until the only word on his mind was her name.

Loki: One he would remember.

Loki: One he would mumble in his slumber as he embraced his pillow tighter.

Loki: One he would call out as his body shook with pleasure, brought by his own hands, wishing they were hers.

Loki: One he would like to say with a sigh, with a smile, with a tear of joy in his eye as he made her his forever.

Loki: And that was just the beginning.

Loki: He needed her smile, he needed her touch, but most of all, he needed to hear her say she loved him.

Loki: [cups your cheek as he looks you deep in the eyes]

Loki: And what better moment than now?

Restaurants and bars really love to test your sobriety by making the route to their bathrooms as labyrinthine as possible

Professor Hiddleston at it’s finest.

Tom Hiddleston steps in as substitute teacher and shares his insights on Hamlet.

wasn't going to repost but the last one is way too accurate and made me sob so here....

odin: hey…. uh… loki…… son… why are you wearing… black and green….?

loki: i dunno i guess it just felt right

odin, nervously: o-oh???? :)))

Types of Kisses Loki Gives You

~The First

You first kiss with Loki is full of passion and confession. Neither of you even know who kissed who, but it doesn’t matter. It’s a tentative embrace at first, and when Loki’s tongue brushes your lips and asks for more, you draw away. A knowing look is shared between you both before your mouths connect again in a searing event. This time, you don’t run.

~The Hasty Ones

You and Loki lead busy lives, and dangerous ones at that. Loki is accustomed to your touch though, and will take it no matter how rushed. Before you part ways, Loki always gives a quick yet deeply satisfying kiss- a promise of what’s yet to come.

~The Angry Ones

Even in fights, you and Loki can’t seem to do anything but reconcile. Loki will push you up against the wall, pin your arms over your head with just one of his. With your shirt ridden up, Loki will use his free hand trace his fingers oh-so-lightly over your exposed skin, pushing you all the more to the edge. You meet his eyes, furious expression on both of your faces, until Loki takes your mouth in his and suddenly all is forgiven. 

~The Gentle Ones

Being with Loki means a lot of things, and the Trickster feels insurmountable guilt for you having to fight battles you did not sign up for. Loki will watch you mournfully, take your hand and delicately place his lips against your bloodied knuckles. In his youth, he remembers, Frigga used to tell him kisses would help wounds heal faster. Loki prays this wasn’t simply another lie he was told. When he glances up at you again, his eyes are full of tears. 

~The Desperate Ones

These are kisses Loki grants you late into the night, when your bodies have become one and your minds are full of nothing but each other. These kisses are placed on your hips, your stomach, your chest, and leave bruises in their wake. They are reserved for when Loki needs to know you’re his; and when you need to know you’re wanted. You bear these marks Loki gives you for weeks, but the feeling of his hot mouth on your bare skin stays with you for years. 

~The Tender Ones

Your favorites. These are the embraces that allow Loki to remind you just what you are to him: not an ally, not a phase, but a lover. He places one hand on your waist, another on your neck, running the pad of his thumb over your cheek. He’ll kiss your jaw first, murmuring about how much he loves you into your skin. How much he needs you. How much he cares. Stolen confessions that are only for your ears. You’ll say them all back to the god, and add that your surrender is for Loki and Loki alone. He’ll kiss you then, slow and steady and amazing. Eventually, you close your eyes, and meet Loki in the dark. 

AAAGGGHHHHHHNDAKJGSHLKAJNGVHFBKYDNVFJMBN   

WTF, OMG- 

I CAN’T EVEN-

THIS WAS SO GOOD BUT SO BAD

UUGGHJHXZJFNJHK

Shahi Shadi

A/N: Please dont send me to jail this is a joke and doesnt actually mean or accuse actual irl people and does not contain references to actual people it is a work of fiction i wrote high on maggi masala thanks bye

Taglist: @veronicasummersfelton @bluemusickid @abeyyaaar @sherlocksacchimesamlaingiknamhai @didyouputyournameinthegobi

It was a dark night, when he proposed it. They were in the central office, having stayed long after everyone was gone. Arnab’s voice blasted on the TV’s speakers – which were set to the lowest volume.

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