WE ARE THOR STANS FIRST AND PEOPLE SECOND

Into The Spider-Verse Has One Negative Review

Let’s see.

Game of Thrones, Star Wars, and Marvel: we’re in the endgame now, we’ve come to the end of an era. me:

karl urban + fucking sunglasses

Pacific Rim: Well written and developed female character fights aliens with her golden retriever

Winter Soldier: well written and developed female character fights the government with her golden retriever and bird

Mad Max: Several well written and developed female characters fight everything with their confused golden retriever 

i just cant get over the lobster scene. like his friends are actively begging him, do not get into the lobster tank. please eddie. tom hardy you were in mad max fury road dont do this. and tom hardy looks at his friend like “i know i shouldnt do this. i shouldnt be getting into this lobster tank but i’m going to anyway. i’m already mostly inside. cant stop now. i’m sorry i dont want to be doing this either there’s just no other choice for me.” and then he takes a bg bite out of a live lobster that’s still in the shell and everything. 

tom hardy doesn’t actually know he’s being possessed by an alien yet in the story. he’s just resigned himself to whatever fucking meltdown he seems to be having. he doesn’t even seem particularly surprised that things have gone this way for him. like ten minutes later he finds out his heart stopped working and hes just like “you asshole” and he throws his alien parasite against the wall like a water balloon. and then he just leaves and is immediately kidnapped. what a fucking wild ride tom hardy is on. 

tom hardy’s actual superpower is being the exact same level of dysfunctional no matter what is happening in his life. so when everything’s going ok for him he self-destructs spectacularly, but when literally everything that can happen to a human being happens to him, he does, like, unrealistically well. climbing into a lobster tank and eating a live animal with large claws just like… “well, this is what’s happening to me today. i’m so sorry you have to watch this, man. anyway here goes, i’m going to bite into a living creature with my human mouth and then LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS”

this movie’s fucking killing me from the inside.

SOMEONE help me find that galaxy brain meme with star trek vs. star wars where it goes from "star wars is better" to "star trek is better" to "both have valuable things to offer and cannot be compared" and the ends with "actually star trek is better" because that is THE mood right now

are you nasty

#several points were made

bonus:

reigen arataka winning every inane twitter category despite being completely unqualified for all of them is extra funny when you think about the fact he makes his entire living doing something he has no qualifications for. this is how it’s meant to be.