im sure lots of people will listen to TTPD and discount it because she talks about matty in it (and ofc people have their valid issues with him, but im not gonna go into that), but the whole lead up to the album has been “we’re investigating,” and imo a lot of us took that as her saying “we’re investigating why my relationship ended” whereas the album is actually about “we’re investigating this caricature of a girl who went through something life-changing, and she has apparently gone crazy” and she’s basically done a public autopsy of herself; something that the media/fans/public have done since the beginning, but this time around she was like “i’ll do it to myself.”
hence, the album aesthetic feels so sterile too imo. she’s trying to distance herself from the subject but!!!!!! she is the subject. and in conclusion, i think what she’s really putting down is “the summary of the investigation of this girl is that she went insane because of what happened to her, but it’s hopefully gonna be okay”
sidenote: i think what we need to take away from the album is to… let her live…
rocker eddie/actor steve | exes to lovers | fame au p6 (final part)
p1 p2 p3 p4 p5 interlude
Steve thinks about second chances, as he walks along Greenwich Ave. He thinks about them when he tosses the wig in a garbage can that reeks of puke.
And he thinks about them, when Eddie opens the door, eyes catching on the rip in Steve’s jeans, the liner under his eyes. When he lights up & says, “You came.”
Yeah, Steve thinks about second chances.
He offers Eddie a small smile as he walks in, can’t bring himself to acknowledge it all. The world of them. Him going. Eddie playing that song. What that could mean, like, actually mean. Can’t do it yet.
He likes this place better than the mansion in LA. It’s messy and grungy with stupid, corny shit plastered on the walls. Feels more… Eddie.
They walk out to the balcony. It overlooks a tiny little green space, his neighbors’ homes. Eddie lights a cigarette and offers one to Steve. Steve quit years ago. Eddie knows that now. He takes it anyway.
“Last tour I sold out Madison Square Garden and now I sell out Forest Hills.” Eddie’s chuckling, “Like I’m back at the trailer park.”
Eddie’s third album didn’t do the numbers his first two had. So they’d downsized, just a little.
Steve sighs, he didn’t fly all the way out here to coddle his ex, “It was a good show, Eddie.”
“Yeah.” He drags, smiles to himself. “It was a really good show. I’m really glad you saw it, baby.”
Steve cringes, full body shiver. Eddie doesn’t seem to realize what he said, Steve’s sure as hell not gonna clue him in.
“How’d your meeting go?”
Steve tries to play it off. “Good. Pretty good.”
Eddie chuckles again, leans into him that way he always does, like personal space is more of a suggestion than a boundary. A hand brushes his cheek, a light, teasing tap of knuckles, “What’s pretty good, Harrington?”
Steve smiles into it. Can’t help it. “There’s uh… you know that blacklist script I mentioned last month? There’s probably a lead there for me.”
Eddie lights up again, bright and true, “Steve, that’s amazing.”
Steve snorts, “Not jealous?”
“Nah, I’m happy for you ba-” Eddie catches it this time, chokes on his drag, coughs and flounders, “Happy for you, man.”
Steve’s not sure if he can do this, actually. Can’t face this Eddie. The one whose ego isn’t a storm cloud, who’s okay failing, who’s okay seeing him succeed. Who’s honest and sincere and wants the best for him. Eddie who would lose thousands of fans just to sing Steve’s favorite song.
Eddie’s eyes are shiny, “But you’ve been good?”
“Yeah, yeah. Good. Keeping busy. I filmed an Amex commercial. Good money. Made my agents happy.” He’s rambling around it. He squints into the dark, drops it casually as he can muster. “I’m gonna start seeing that country singer, probably. The one with that Kansas song? Our people are setting something up.”
Eddie’s face falls, the sun out with a sentence. “What are we doing here, Harrington?”
Steve’s tone is bleary, sheepish, “What?”
“Been losing my mind this last month. Can’t stand not having you around. But you- you’re dating?”
It’s a shrug, it’s all he's got, “Sure.”
Eddie’s hunched, shoulders tight. He talks small. “You told me you loved me. Before you left.”
Steve huffs a breath. The air is cold. “C’mon. You were like, obliterating my brain with your dick. I say impulsive shit like that all the time.”
He doesn’t. They both know that.
Eddie clicks his teeth, shakes a whisper. “Nah. You don’t.”
Steve falters, trips on his tongue. He finds his voice low and hoarse, he can barely say it, “Please don’t hold me to it.”
Eddie won’t look him in the eye. He blinks up at the sky, “I love you. For the record. I um, I never stopped. Guess I’ve been pretty obvious about it.”
“Eddie, c’mon. Don’t do this. It’s not fair.”
“Date Dorothy.” His laugh is glacial. “I don’t mind. It won’t be real, right? Those things never fucking are.”
“I don’t know– it could be.” The ground’s falling under Steve’s feet. “Down the line, or whatever.”
Something cracks, crumples. “I had you. God fucking damnit. I had you and I–”
Steve’s not expecting the sobs until they happen. Flemmed and shaky and pathetic. Those brown eyes silver-wet like moons.
Eddie pushes his palms into his cheeks. “Sometimes, after you leave, I just stare up at the ceiling and try to invent like, time travel or something. Just to go back and slap the shit outta myself. I was a goddamn coward. Couldn’t face it. Could talk around it, sure. Write it into my songs like that was honest. But, nah, I couldn’t look in the mirror. Definitely couldn’t look at you. I’m facing it now. I need you to know that. It won’t fix all shit I did, won’t fix the stupid fucking way I tried to fix it the first time. It’s there, it’s out, hell, it’s goddamn double platinum.” He sputters it out miserable, “But I am trying. Even if this– if we can’t. Need you to know I’m facing it now. I want to be better.”
Then Eddie looks right at him, looks at Steve like looking is enough to break his heart. “And I don’t wanna be selfish anymore cause it’s poison, Steve. But fuck. I know I don’t deserve it but if you’ll have me, I’ll– I’m there. Whatever way you’ll take me.”
“Eddie.” Steve doesn’t know why he’s here. Why he keeps digging this wound, ripping out stitches.
“Please? Can’t walk away again. Don’t have it in me.”
“Yeah.” Steve laughs. “You only do that when it’s easy.”
Eddie flinches. Shoves a ringed hand into a pocket. “Too late, huh?”
Steve scratches the back of his head and turns on his heel, “We can’t keep doing this.”
He gets as far the kitchen. Eddie quicksteps in front of the counter, blocks his out. But he’s cowering, ducking his head. “Did you um, like the song?”
It swells up all at once, that bone-deep cruelty of it. A gust turned tsunami. “Not really, Ed. Kinda broke my fucking heart.”
“Shit,” Eddie clicks. “Yeah, I, um, I’m not all that good at the grand gesture thing. Probably should have figured that out by now.”
Steve lets it all in. The red that’s been thrumming through his body since this whole thing started. Lets it possess him. He pushes into Eddie’s space, callous and cruel. “You’re really fucking me up, here. Do you know that?”
“I– I’m not trying to.” Eddie blinks. Frustratingly earnest.
“What we’re doing– Whatever this is. It makes me feel pathetic. I’d be the dumbest asshole on the planet if I took you back.” He’s screaming now. The balcony door is still open. He doesn’t care if anyone hears. He wants them to hear.
Eddie’s lip is shaking. “I’m sorry.”
“I hate you.” Steve murmurs. The red’s coming off in whisps, quicker than it ever had, easier than it should.
Eddie’s smile is weak. His face is wet. “I know.”
“You ruined me.” He leans in, finds half a punch in it. Last one he’s got.
Eddie closes his eyes, brow furrowed. “I know.”
“I don’t want anyone else.” He’s tired. Bone tired. Tired of the ache that only ever seems to go away around, well–
Eddie’s guilt is plain. It's all of him. “I’m sorry.”
Steve takes a breath. He thinks about second chances.
“You really want to be with me?”
Eddie looks at him like he’s already burrowed in. Ribs and guts and blood. “Got my priorities way out of whack for a minute there. Jesus, way too many minutes there. But yeah. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. You’re it for me, Stevie.”
Steve groans, taps his forehead lightly against a shelf. Eddie’s hand lands steady at his arm, awkward and cautious and right. “I’m a fucking idiot.”
“No.” Eddie says soft. “You’re not.”
“Yeah, I am.” Steve shakes his head. Waves a finger into Eddie’s chest. “You sang Dave fucking Matthews.”
“Don’t remind me, man. They’re gonna start shattering my CDs.” He pauses, sincere as ever. ‘I, uh, wouldn’t take it back though.”
Steve groans again, presses his head into Eddie’s shoulder. “No, you don’t get it. You sang Dave Matthews and now I’m gonna have to call my team and tell them it’s not gonna happen with the country singer.”
Eddie blubbers, big Saturday morning cartoon recalibration. “You’re– what?”
Steve shrugs, catches his eye. “Now I’m gonna have to talk about my coming out journey with Angie at People and dude, she’s been on my ass about it for years. Total sore winner.”
He’s shaking his head, “Harrington… Steve. Stevie.”
But Steve keeps rattling on, “I’m gonna have to tip off the paparazzi that Dark Pines star Steve Harrington was spotted sneaking into Eddie Munson’s brownstone at midnight for a secret rendezvous. Gonna have to go for a jog around the block first thing tomorrow, with like, more hickeys than a teen who just got their first girlfriend.”
“You’ve really thought about this, huh?”
Eddie’s back pushes into the edge of the kitchen counter. And Steve thinks about that photo that forced them together again, about Eddie’s easy grin, about the soft adoration high on his cheeks, about never being so young. He thinks about fucking up and growing up and growing apart and changing. And he smiles against chapped lips that taste like cigarettes and coming home.
And he says, “Gonna have to find someone to give me the hickeys.”
And Eddie lights up like the sun, “I know a guy.”
And Steve, well, he thinks about second chances.
jacks never had a bad track. “Glad to know you’re thinking about me when you kiss your husband.” BANGER. “But for tonight, let me pretend you’re mine.” ICONIC. “I’d probably kill another man if I found him with you like this” LIFE CHANGING. “There is nothing of equal value to me”. UNMATCHED.
the funniest thing i have seen all day 💀💀
Malin, teaching Wilhelm how to drive: You see August and Marcus walking in the middle of the street. What do you hit?
Wille: Um… Well. I mean, I hate them both, so- Malin: The BRAKES. You hit the brakes!
Simon, eating a satsuma in the backseat: Hit the gas, Wille.
les mis my love
reblog if the first musical you listened to was not Hamilton
my absolute fav
i’ll never hear the end of it if he loses. so go vote Mike Wheeler in the @cringefaillosersummit
"This is a Joe Alwyn album" "This is a Matty Healy album" shut up shut up SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!! Swifties are so annoying, this is a TAYLOR SWIFT ALBUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY IS YOUR FIRST REACTION TO ASSIGN THINGS TO A MAN!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!!
Main Tags: Social Media AU | Band AU | Corroded Coffin AU | Fruity Four AU | Idiots in Love | unintentional fake relationship | Misunderstandings | past toxic friendship
Pairings: Steddie | Ronance
Status: 20/20 | Complete
Since I'm having trouble linking the CF updates to each other I decided for my own sake to just make a list here and update it every time I post a new update. I hope this makes it easier to read the AU!
Introduction:
2. First Hideout Gig:
3. Love Sucks Sometimes & Hellfire Club:
4. The Intervention:
5. Halloween pt 1:
6. Halloween pt 2:
7. Bonding Times:
8. A taste of Success:
9. The Instagram Live:
10. The Business Meeting:
obsessed with this letterboxd review for CHALLENGERS (2024) by rocky/WAYSTIAR
i used to think my lil harry potter phase would stop when i got older.
then i crossed over to the gay side. oh boy. oooooh boy. this is now an integral part of my personality forever i'm pretty sure heh
and i'm so here for it.
i think i just went through all the stages of grief watching that final episode but holy fuck bitches we did it.