Latest Posts by calabrie - Page 2

Is it normal to feel lesbian attraction towards john lennon and paul mccartney

Ok, here it is. We've had the 'insane things Paul has said about John' list, now here's 'insane things John has said about Paul'*

*Note: Some of these are ‘John said to me’ quotes rather than words from John himself, so take these ones with a grain of salt.

And because so much of John’s Paul-induced insanity reflected in his actions, some (dis)honourable mentions…

Cutting up a girl's clothes and calling her a whore for sleeping with Paul (from the Beatles Anthology book)

Being mean to Jane when Paul first meets her

Defending Paul after the LSD controversy time and time again

Writing 'I'm always perfect' on a photo of Paul and 'funeral' on a photo of Paul & Linda's wedding

Getting upset about Too Many People and writing How Do You Sleep in response

Mocking the Ram photo with a pig

Using the 'Let Me Roll It' riff in Beef Jerky

Having a fight with Yoko and immediately running off to Paris

Other icebergs…

Insane things Paul has said about John

McLennon - by @frodolives

Paul McCartney - by @frodolives

Sources, full quotes and some others that wouldn't fit under the cut!

"If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with" - The Mike Douglas Show, 1972

"Things are still the same between us. He was and still is my closest friend, except for Yoko" - 1971 interview

"He said to me, 'Artie, you worked with your Paul recently … I'm getting calls … that my Paul wants to work with me and I'm thinking about it … How did it go when you worked with Paul?'" - Art Garfunkel anecdote (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

Mintz: There's one name that has not come up in our discussion [...] Paulie. John: Yes, we did! We got Paul in it. And I object to that 'Paulie' business - 1973 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"If anybody said anything bad about Paul, John'd take a swing at you. He'd say, "You can't talk about Paul like that". Paul was his best buddy" - Alice Cooper anecdote

"I'm entitled to call Paul what I want to, and vice versa; it's in our family. But if somebody else calls him names I won't take it." - 1974 interview

"Paul was one of the most innovative bass players that ever played bass. And half the stuff that’s going on now is directly ripped off from his Beatle period." - 1980 interview

After a late lunch, Linda launched into a long paean to the joys of living in England. When she was finished, she turned to John and said, “Don’t you miss England?” “Frankly,” John replied, “I miss Paris.” - Loving John by May Pang (1983) (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

"The Boulevard Saint-Germainegreer shone in all its springbok glory as he stepped lightly on some French loafers toward the waiting arms of Comrade Amie" (and a lot more) - Skywriting by Word of Mouth

"My cheri my pau pau, do you remember when we were at a cafe on the left bank? You could not find your garter? Because it was on your little prod" - John's song demo (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I'm just like everybody else, Harry, I fell for Paul's looks." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @thegirlwiththeaxe)

"He also looked like Elvis. I dug him." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @lesbianjohnlennon)

As the limousine edged through the screaming fans outside the cinema, John said laconically, 'Push Paul out first, he's the prettiest.' - Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006) (submitted by @fishfingerpies)

I could even hear what they were saying off-mike; ‘Oh Paul, you’re so cute tonight.’ was met with the reply 'Sod off, Lennon.’ - Joan Baez anecdote (submitted by @rabiessnail )

'Are those jeans tight, Paul?' That was John. 'What do you mean tight?' 'I can see your suspender belt through 'em and your stockings. You've got ladders in them.' Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006)

John: It sounds a vaguely good idea but I wouldn’t have my wife or any of me friends wearing them. Paul: Well, you’ve had us wearing them. John: I know, Paulie, but you’re so well-built - 1964 interview

Ringo: And I Love Her, yeah I love that one …and the way you sing it knocks me out, man. John: And the way that camera goes over your head… I thought, 'hello' - 1964 interview

"Meeting Paul was just like two people meeting.  Not falling in love or anything.  Just us.  It went on.  It worked." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @i-am-the-oyster, @thewalrusespublicist)

"Hey! Did you dream about me last night? …Very strong dream. We both dreamt about it. It was amazing! Different dreams, you know, but I thought you must’ve been there…. I was touching you" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @adriennefrombrooklyn)

"We do need each other alot. When we used to get together after a month off, we used to be embarrassed about touching each other. We’d do an elaborate handshake just to hide the embarrassment… or we did mad dances. Then we got to hugging each other. Now we do the Buddhist bit… arms around. It’s just saying hello, that’s all." - - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968)

Houghton: How do you feel about Paul McCartney now? John: Uh, we’re – haha. [laughs] This is like a joke: “We’re just good friends.” We’re – we’re pretty close now, like I was telling you before. - 1974 interview

"Nobody ever said anything about Paul having a spell over me, when I was with him for a long time. Or me having a spell over Paul. They didn’t think that was abnormal, two guys together. […] Why didn’t anybody ever say, “How come those guys don’t split up? I mean, what’s going on backstage? I mean, what is that Paul and John business? Why – you know, how can they be together so long?” - 1980 interview

"When I’m up against the wall, Paul, you’ll find I do my best" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @iiiiiiits-m)

"The plus is that your best friend, also, can hold you without… I mean, I’m not a homosexual, or we could have had a homosexual relationship and maybe that would have satisfied it, with working with other male artists." - 1972 interview (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

“When we sang together, Paul and I would share the same microphone. I’d be close enough to kiss him […] So we’d be playing these concerts, in front of thousands of people, but the only thing I could see was Paul’s face. He was always there next to me – I could always feel his presence. It’s what I remember most about those concerts.” - Elliot Mintz, 'We All Shine On: John, Yoko & Me' (2024)

Paul: There’s a story. There’s another one – ‘Don’t Let Me Down’. “Oh darling, I’ll never let you down.” Like we’re doing— John: Yeah. It’s like you and me are lovers. Paul: [reserved] Yeah. [pause] John: We’ll just have to camp it up for those two. Paul: Yeah. Well, I’ll be wearing my skirt for the show, anyway. - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @alienoriana)

"The early stuff – the Hard Day’s Night period, I call it – the early period, was the early equi– se– what I’m – what I’m equating it to is the sexual equivalent of the beginning of a relationship, of people in love. And the Sgt. Pepper-Abbey Road period was the period of maturity in the relationship. And maybe had we gone on together, maybe something more interesting would have come out of it." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I mean, there were quite a few women he’d obviously had that I never knew about. God knows when he was doing it, but he must have been doing it" - 1972 interview

“It’s just handy to fuck your best friend. That’s what it is. And once I resolved the fact that it was a woman as well, it’s all right. We go through the trauma of life and death every day so it’s not so much of a worry about what sex we are anymore. I’m living with an artist who’s inspiring me to work." - 1971 interview (note: I know the 'best friend' here is Yoko, but the implications, baby...)

"He rang up and said he’d got this job and couldn’t come to the group. So I told him on the phone, “Either come or you’re out.” So he had to make a decision between me and his dad then, and in the end he chose me. But it was a long trip." - 1971 interview

"This song was written by an old estranged fiancé of mine called Paul" - Introducing 'I Saw Her Standing There' at Madison Square Garden, 1974 (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"The person I actually picked as my partner, who I’d recognised had talent, and I could get on with, was Paul" - 1980 interview (submitted by @crepesuzette2023)

"It would not have been the same. It would have been a different thing. But maybe it wouldn’t either. Maybe it was a marriage that had to end. Some marriages don’t get through that – that phase. It’s hard to speculate about what would have been." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I was living with Paul then, so I wrote with him. It’s whoever you’re living with. He writes with Linda. He’s living with her. It’s just natural" - 1971 interview

"It's like when the lawyers come into the divorce, you know? And that makes it a whole different ball game, you know… 'speak to my lawyer'" - 1973 interview

"It was never a legal deal between Paul and I. It was a deal we made when we were fifteen or sixteen, when we decided to write together, that we’d put both our names on ’em, you know." - 1980 interview

"And “go out and get her,” you know, and forget everything else. So subconsciously I take it that he was saying, “Go ahead.” On a conscious level, he didn’t want me to go ahead. So subconsciously, he… The angel in him was saying, “Bless you.” The devil in him didn’t like it at all. Because he didn’t want to lose his partner." - John talking about Hey Jude, 1980 interview

"When I slagged off the Beatle thing in the papers, it was like divorce pangs, and me being me it was blast this and fuck that" - 1974 interview

"And it’s really lawyers that make… divorces nasty. You know, if there was a nice ceremony like getting married, for divorce, then it would be much better. Even divorce of business partners. Because it wouldn’t be so nasty." - 1971 interview

"It’s like asking a divorced couple, “What day was it that – that decided you to – that the marriage wasn’t going well?” I didn’t – there was no date." - 1976 interview

"I’ve compared it to a marriage a million times, and I hope it’s… understandable for people that aren’t married, or any relationship. It was a long relationship." - 1976 interview

"I’ve only selected to work with – for more than a one night stand, say with an odd thing with [David] Bowie, or an odd thing with Elton [John], or anybody who was hanging around – two people. Paul McCartney, and Yoko Ono. Okay?" - 1980 interview

"I seen through junkies, I been through it all, I seen religion from Jesus to Paul" - 'I Found Out' lyrics, 1970 (submitted by @johns-prince)

“I’m glad that’s over. I feel like I’ve been keeping a vigil for him. Not that I care, you understand.” - John, according to John Green, Dakota Days (1983)

"One girl very shyly gave George a button badge which said ‘George for PM.’ ‘Why would Paul McCartney want you?’ said John to George.” - Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

John: "I was trying to put it 'round that I was gay, you know-- I thought that would throw them off… dancing at all the gay clubs in Los Angeles, flirting with the boys… but it never got off the ground." Q: "I think I've only heard that lately about Paul." John: "Oh, I've had him, he's no good." - 1975 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

And I had a little upstairs, an unusable upstairs, and I kept a radio up there. Very faint. All of a sudden John said, "Is that Paul?" I thought it was somebody he knew named Paul. I didn't see anybody walk by. I said, "No." On the radio, Paul McCartney. We never mentioned anything about The Beatles. This little, low sound you could barely hear, he picked it right up. So, it just made me aware of how much attuned he was with The Beatles after they broke up.. - Gary Tracy, John's optometrist

John: "I've always thought there was this underlying thing in Paul's 'Get Back.' When we were in the studio recording it, every time he sang the line 'Get back to where you once belonged,' he'd look at Yoko." - 1980 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

But in mid-January 1973 Lennon and Ono quarrelled publicly at another party. “I wish I was back with Paul,” Lennon reportedly said. - Peter Doggett, You Never Give Me Your Money: The Battle for the Soul of The Beatles. (2009) (submitted by @notgrungybitchin)

'From time to time John would say to me ''I wonder what Paul is thinking about, right now.'' I said John, I've only met him a couple of times in my life you know … I have no idea. And John would ask ''Do you think he thinks about me at all?''' - Elliot Mintz (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist )

“He was always saying, ‘I wonder what Paul is doing.’ When John and I were together, and this is about a week or two before our relationship ended, I remember him saying, ‘Do you think I should write with Paul again?’ I said, ‘Absolutely. You should because you want to. The two of you as solo performers are good, but together you can’t be beaten.” - May Pang

“Yeah, I miss Paul a lot. It’s been a year since I’ve seen him. He came over with Linda to me place in New York. Course I’d love to see him again. He’s an old friend, isn’t he?” - 1974 interview

"I never thought we’d come to that, because I didn’t think we were that stupid. But we were naïve enough to let people come between us." - 1971 interview

‘Paul? My dear one’ - 1980 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"I’ve read cracks about, “Oh, the Beatles sang ‘All You Need Is Love’, but it didn’t work for them,” but nothing will ever break the love we have for each other." - 1972 interview

'"I just saw a girl who said she saw John Lennon walking down the street in New York wearing a button that said, "I love Paul." She asked him: "Why are you wearing an 'I love Paul' button?", and he said: "Because I love Paul." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @bluewater9)

Tony Bramwell on Brian:

- Brian dropped in at the Cavern and, spoiled for choice, fell in love at first sight with each of the Beatles in turn

- Brian almost promised to love, honour and obey them.

- He never publicly showed his embarrassment with poor deals, but one could tell something wasn’t right because inside, he anguished. Chewed his knuckles and grew pale.

- He was a fiercely loyal and honourable friend to those he loved, and ruthless toward those he despised

- He was shy to the point of blushing and stammering, and theatrical to the point of ranting and frothing at the mouth

- His biggest problem, perhaps his only real problem, was that he was homosexual in a still very unenlightened era. It kept getting in the way. Whenever he sat down for a meeting with heavyweights like Sir Joseph Lockwood at EMI, or whoever, he felt they all knew. “They’re talking behind my back, Tony,” Brian said. “They don’t respect me.”

- Paul was fond of Brian and thought he was the best possible manager: one who was courteous, who didn’t interfere with their private lives, but achieved all he said he would do. He never criticized him—none of us did. Brian was a god.  (It was only later that the façade cracked a bit, but even then we loved him. He was like family, and you accept your family for what they are and forgive them most anything.)

- his wonderfully fertile mind continuously thinking up innovative ideas and then worrying about them

- Brian was so different when around his beloved protégés. He became one of them. He was a friend, a chum, charming, trustworthy and kind. He set out to do what he promised and they all said it would never have happened without him.

- Brian bought an off-the-shelf company named Suba Films, which I virtually ran. It was way ahead of its time, the only independent company in England making music videos

- Whenever things got raunchy and out of hand around us, he would make his excuses and leave. At times, he almost ran.

- [on writing his biography]: “You don’t think John will think I’m raining on his parade, do you?” he asked hesitantly.

- I believe that Brian’s paranoia over the Beatles’ contract and his heavy use of drugs led him to think that it was only a matter of time before everything came tumbling down and he would be left standing in the ruins, with people pointing their fingers like kids in a playground.

- He was seriously ill and desperately sought to escape from the circus of his own creation.

- He was tormented by the idea of letting down his beloved Cilla and the Beatles, particularly John.

- He underwent deep sleep therapies at the Priory, being put under for days at a time with heavy drugs.

- Whether he managed the Beatles or not, he would still get 25 percent of their earnings from record sales for nine years. This subtlety had somehow escaped the Beatles, but it bothered Brian. It gnawed at his conscience because in his heart he knew he had conned them.

- [He] was abnormally distressed, convincing himself that they weren’t going to sign up again because they loathed him. Going through months of paranoia, he looked for reasons and forlornly asked the question, “Don’t they like me anymore?”

- It was so silly because it wasn’t like that at all. At different times, all of them commented to me that they would never have signed another contract as “Beatles” but they would have signed individually with Brian.

- “No, I think John hates me now. I don’t know what I’ll do if they don’t sign. What will people think? I can see the headlines now: EPSTEIN DUMPED BY BEATLES.”

- He was now seriously unhappy, not just troubled. His personality had radically changed.

- Brian had resident nurses, doctors who stayed, psychiatrists who lived in, all crowded into that little doll’s house, getting on each other’s nerves. At times he’d make an effort. He would sweet-talk everyone and then escape when they weren’t looking.

- [after Brian's death] Joanne was in shock. She had seen him first. The doors had been broken down and there he was, curled up on his side in bed with Saturday’s mail lying next to him. “We all knew at once that he was dead, but I heard myself say, ‘It’s all right, he’s just asleep. He’s fine,’ ” she said.

- It was unbelievable that the man who had got all this going—the vast money-making machine and the culture shock that had changed the world—was gone.

- The Summer of Love was over and autumn coming.

- I have been asked many times why it was that the Beatles didn’t just hire an office manager to handle their business affairs and pay him or her a salary. It would have made sense. But it never occurred to them. They just went blindly on, trying to find someone to replace Brian, like it was some kind of law. They seemed to think that they had to have a manager, to whom they had to give 25 percent of their gross income, or they’d be arrested or drummed out of the Brownies.

you have to hit that heterosexual 80 year old with the yaoi beam theres no other way

Paul calling George Martin “Daddy”

 Brian and Paul plays a game of cards during the Philippines leg of the Beatles’ final world tour, 3rd-5th July 1966. 

(Photos by Robert Whitaker/Getty Images)

music conspiracy tumblr in 1967

🎸 blondeonblonde1966 Follow

lets be honest bob dylans ass did NOT get into a motorcycle crash like he didnt even try to make it real. there was literally no ambulance no records of the crash NOTHING. shes sucha faker but i respect it

💀 cranberry-sauce Follow

he was jealous of paul mccartney

🎸 blondeonblonde1966 Follow

ok

72 notes

🍓 wheres-the-bus Follow

Paul McCartney, 1942-1966

7,235 notes

🐒 clarrksvilleee Follow

why does michael nesmith seem so hostile towards peter tork irl...honestly i think they should settle it like men and make love in the green grass like god intended

7 notes

🎹 catch61 Follow

honestly i cant believe people are still dumb enough to be watching/posting about the m*nkees. i will fucking block you. it is literally appropriating youth culture and monetising it for their own gain ffs

🎹 catch61 Follow

SOMEONE JUST TOLD ME THEY LOCK THE ACTORS IN A MEAT LOCKER BETWEEN TAKES COME ON 😭😭 have any of you realised that you are actively giving money to a studio thats literally evil. i dont care about the actors or their stupid fake music but come onnnn

17 notes

🍒 tuttifrutti reblogged valleyofthedollies

🍓 wheres-the-bus

Paul McCartney, 1942-1966

#HES LITERALLY ALIVE?? #what the fuck is going on rn

7,235 notes

💊 valleyofthedollies Follow

woke up today and everyone is posting that paul mccartney died..i dont want to believe it but theres so much evidence for it :(

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An absolute must read if you care about Jurgen or John and Paul, or George or gay.

Jurgen is very unapologetically queer.

50 years ago, John sent his son Julian to speak with George on his behalf while he went with Lee Eastman to negotiate.

Eastman told John that George hated him and would not speak to him again unless he signed the papers immediately. The meeting was over once John learned that George forgave him.

the paper copy is even more ridiculous lmAO

This is one of my favourite John & Paul moments ever, because John was shitting himself going on that tour, I mean he had that breakdown in front of Brian and Tony where cried and begged them, ”Whatever you want me to say I’ll say it” - and here’s Paul, taking no prisoners, and just smugly declaring “oh no, no it’ll be absolutely fine, just you fucking watch you sensationalising bastards.”

miscellaneous pics of John and George!!

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-Bengal

harry dubois would end death note in one episode. he'd be unkillable bc he has no fucking idea what his name is and then he'd go drink driving and accidentally run light over and the killings would mysteriously stop

im sorry but i just can't stop thinking about it. this is insane. im feeling so many things. i need to draw this. i need this to be a scene in a biopic if there ever is one.

With Paul out of the room, I answered a knock at the door and met Linda Eastman for the first time. “Hello, may I help you?” I asked. Speaking through me, not to me, she vaguely replied, “Is Paul here?” Over my shoulder she saw Paul coming through the door that led from the bedroom/bathroom portion of the suite, and wham! She went past me like a Notre Dame football tackle. She full-force embraced him in the doorway, push-pulled him through it, slammed the door shut, and that was the last I saw of him or her that day.

Ken Mansfield, The White Book, 2007

in that mintz book does it mention the lost weekend story about off-his-head john yelling "this is all Roman Polanski's fault!!" while stabbing a mattress? Possibly from the same night as the chair tying. Ever since I read about that in May's book it's been my personal what happened in India - what do you MEAN, John????? Did he even know Polanski?

SCREAM no it does not but that beyond tracks 😭 it does however mention that he used to go to casinos and place chips on like almost every single number of the roulette wheel and he'd lose money bc it took more chips to do this than he'd make back when he inevitably won. and when mintz tried to explain this he just got confused bc "but I win every time". also they went to mcdonalds together once. and john thought he solved jfk's assassination (the driver turned around and did it, which. literal video of this not being true)

George Harrison talking about current affairs/climate change during his interview with BP Fallon for RTE Radio 2 Ireland - The BP Fallon Orchestra. (Oct. 1987) 

Full interview: here

Transcript: 

Keep reading

shoutout to that time paul simon and john lennon hosted the grammys

I’d Have You Anytime

Paul, 1966 Revolver Sessions 

what the fuck is wrong with him

What do you make of the infamous hunter davies phone call? Paul does not come off well at all so I do think it was meant to be private. Not that I think Paul would be tell Hunter that he & John did hand stuff or whatever regardless but I do think he truthfully has no idea what had John so upset w him so I agree I don’t think there was some big rejection in India (but then wtf is that get back scene) or elsewhere but I do think John seems driven by some hurt “the wound” as Lindsey-Hogg called it

ugh that phone call i hate it so much like he really wanted all that kept private & it's soooo one-sided like we don't see anything davies said, where he was leading him or not, what he was cutting out... it's just not good journalism, first off, but it's also just so disrespectful

but for the content like....... i think he was really twisted up and in a bad place. it was what, barely 3 months out from john's death? i don't really take Anything he said in that interview at face value like even if he had said "me and john used to fuck like rabbits" in it i would take it with a grain of salt lmao

but anyway re the wound...

i think it's important to note again that these are all fragments of what he said and not like professionally recorded- just written down while they were on the phone.

but i do think there were a lot of things that hurt john about the way paul had been behaving for years (& vice versa) that have nothing to do with their potential sexual/romantic relationship on the surface but i think it was all sort of tangled up. songwriting, friendship, sex- same thing, in what started as a great way and ended up pretty disastrous.

when john talks about the things paul did that pissed him off, he tends to bring up things like this incident w eleanor rigby:

and then naturally w the divorce he tends to bring up the money aspect, paul announcing the break by releasing mccartney and that whole scheduling conflict, paul's treatment of yoko & john's relationship...

i think what's Most Likely, to me, is that:

things started to strain around '65 with john & george doing lsd together and paul turning them down (& them subsequently being dicks to him about it And going off to write she said she said together, which is as far as i know the first time either paul or john actively wrote with someone else like that).

'66 brought the end of touring, john's increasing reliance on lsd to cope, being separated for months for the first time in years when john filmed how i won the war, paul working on the family way (which john later said was hurtful), and paul settling into the sort of "swinging london life" while john was stuck in the suburbs with a family. i think they were, for once, doing things very separately. they had separate lives, when they'd been joined at the hip since at least hamburg. john even later referred to it as them "living together" (in the context of, he lived with paul so he wrote with paul, he lives with yoko so he writes with yoko).

'67 just continued that snowball of Bad bc while they were very close for sgt pepper's, you also have brian dying and paul just continuing to push them all to work on mmt. and i can only imagine the types of insensitive things he was doing similar to that eleanor rigby account without realizing they were hurtful. it's also when john & cynthia's relationship was really starting to deteriorate. paul also proposed to jane in december.

'68 ofc had india, but i GENUINELY do not think anything super crazy happened there. i think they were sober for the first time in ages, meditating for hours on end, and just Thinking. with everything that came before it, i wouldn't be shocked if part of that thinking was about their relationship and where it was going and the beatles in general. the get back scene really reads waaaay too light-hearted to me to be indicative of any serious issues- they're smiling and joking around and paul at Most seems a lil uncomfortable that john's bringing this up in public. which just honestly makes me think that if that Was referencing them fucking, it was just a regular thing. and john was maybe bringing it up to try and poke a bit at that close relationship they had lost along the way. i think paul leaving early did probably set off his abandonment issues a bit, even if it was pre-planned, but i don't think enough to "hurt him worse than anyone ever has"

the rest of '68........ shit was a mess. you have john leaving cynthia for yoko, the cursed apple nyc trip, john & yoko staying with paul (which REALLY would not have happened if there was some huge rejection that made john hate paul), paul doing enough coke to kill a fucking whale, francie, jane & paul splitting, paul meeting linda and getting serious with her, the white album disaster, john starting to rely on yoko as a creative partner where he hadn't let anyone else in before like that aside from paul... just a nightmare all around and i think they probably, if they had a sexual relationship, let it fall to the wayside around this time. they're both busier, they're both in relationships they're actually sort of committed to now, they're growing up, etc.

but by '69, with get back specifically, there's a ton of tension there ofc- but they're still joking around and close and loving in a way that doesn't jive with the wound being some big argument i don't think. i think whatever happened, it happened unsaid. which leads to both of them being hurt, neither of them knowing how badly they hurt the other person, paul scrambling to figure out what he possibly did wrong to hurt john more than anyone in his life... like, to him, in this scenario here i find most likely, it would've just been a slow and meandering end to their relationship, sexual or otherwise, that culminated in john asking for a divorce and then everyone freaking out when he was the one to make that official. so it wouldn't fit with john saying he hurt him more than anyone. for john, i think he'd started feeling terrified as early as '65 that paul was going to leave him- paul was better than him (gotta love yesterday), paul didn't need him, paul was thriving in london while he was stuck in his house depressed and high, etc etc. all these god awful thoughts that only came true, in his view, when paul just let him go. i think john wanted a fight and i think paul thought that handling things peacefully would save the relationship. i don't think either of them really got each other at all, in that instance, and it fucked them.

Paul's grief over time: A Compilation

“During the session [in 1981] Paul fell into a lugubrious mood. He said, ‘I’ve just realized that John is gone. John’s gone. He’s dead and he is not coming back.’ And he looked completely dismayed, like shocked at something that had just hit him. ‘Well, it’s been a few weeks now.’ He said, ‘I know, Eric, but I’ve just realized." (Eric Stewart)

“It’s still weird even to say, ‘before he died’. I still can’t come to terms with that. I still don’t believe it. It’s like, you know, those dreams you have, where he’s alive; then you wake up and… 'Oh’.” (Paul, 1986)

"Occasionally, it wells up. Y'know, and I'm at home on the weekend suddenly and I start thinking about him or talking to the kids about him and I can't handle it." (Paul, 1987)

"Is there a record you like to put on just to hear John’s voice?" I ask Paul the next day. Paul looks startled. He fumbles. “Oh, uh. There’s so much of it. I hear it on the car radio when I’m driving.” No, that’s not what I mean", I persist. "Isn’t there a time when you just wish you could talk to John, when you’d like to hear his voice again?" For some reason, he instead responds to the original question.“Oh sure,” he says and looks a little taken aback. ‘Beautiful Boy". (1990)

"Also not obvious is that McCartney [for the Liverpool Oratorio] has penned a gorgeous black-spiritual-like piece for mezzo-soprano that intones the last words spoken to John Lennon as he lay dying of gunshot wounds in the back of a New York police car -- "Do you know who you are?" McCartney gets a bit choked up at one point when he reveals, "Not a day goes by when I don't think of John.” (1991)

"Delicious boy, delicious broth of a boy. He was a lovely guy, you know. And it gets sadder and sadder to be saying “was”. Nearer to when he died I couldn’t believe I was saying “was”, but now I do believe I’m saying “was”. I’ve resisted it. I’ve tried to pretend he didn’t get killed." (Paul, 1995)

"Paul talked about John a a lot, but the strange thing was that it was in the present tense, “John says this" or "John thinks that. Very weird." (Peter Cox, 2006)

“John Lennon was shot dead in 1980. That totally knocked dad for six. I haven’t really spoken to him a lot about it because it is such a touchy subject." (James McCartney, 2013)

"It's very difficult for me and I, occasionally, will have thoughts and sort of say: "I don't know why I don't just break down crying every day? […] You know, I don't know how I would have dealt with it because I don't think I've dealt with it very well. In a way… I wouldn't be surprised if a psychiatrist would sort of find out that I'm slightly in denial, because it's too much." (Paul, 2020)

"Like any bereavement, the only way out is to remember how good it was with John. Because I can't get over the senseless act. I can't think about it. I'm sure it's some form of denial. But denial is the only way that I can deal with it." (Paul, 2020)

"When I talked to Paul about John and when he missed John most, he couldn't answer me for a long time and his eyes teared up. And I asked him where he thinks about John and when John comes into his mind and he just … he lost it, he completely lost it." (Bob Spitz, 2021)

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The following two are from the gossip website Datalounge, so they may or may not be true. Still interesting though:

"The one time I was ever actually in a room with Paul, zillion people between me and him (and no way I'm gonna bother him, all of us who travel in celeb circles have people we're fans of and all of us inexplicably try to hide it to seem "cooler"), he started talking loudly about himself and John, and how hard it was not to have him there. I remember him saying something along the lines of not a day passing that John's not still in it with him, but it's not like he can pick up a phone and say, "Hey, just needed to hear your voice today," and even when he got craggy responses, he still missed them. He misses it all, and it's bothering to him that he misses him more as time goes on -- it doesn't heal, he just learns new ways to bandage the wound."

“Since everyone is anonymous here, I guess I can give a bit of info I got from a female friend of mine who at one time worked as one of Paul’s assistants. [...] She does not know for certain if John and Paul were involved but she suspects it since to this day whenever John’s name is brought up he acts in her words ‘like a widow’ and he also addresses John in present tense. He would say things like, ‘John thinks that the music should be like this,’ and during his bitter divorce from Heather he was saying, ‘John says that this is getting nasty.’ Kind of creepy." (this one actually seems very intriguing because it sounds very similar to what Peter Cox said, about Paul often talking about John in the present tense, saying "John says.." or "John thinks...")

i feel like out of everyone in john’s life that hes been romantically involved w even if its speculation (yoko, cyn, brian, stu, groupies) he’d always pick paul and thats what makes mclennon mclennon

i mean he did also pick someone over paul. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where you’re coming from here but he very much did choose someone over paul.

you should def draw brian for maximum love healing and strength !!! 🙂‍↕️ <333

I sweaaaaar I swear I read this story about Brian sneaking into a beatles concert to fangirl along with the audience am I insane did I get this from midas man. Either way here's our man having the time of his life

the funny thing about paul saying “maybe if i were a girl i could…” in reference to john and yoko is that paul being a girl would not make him and john’s relationship any better

geooooorge... geoooorgggeeeeeee....