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ADHD and Navigating Healthcare Systems

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: navigating the US healthcare system is a Kafkaesque executive dysfunction nightmare: -2019 GYN appointment: given a referral for an ultrasound and mammogram. This was before I was taking medication for my ADHD, and I didn’t even know who to call to make an appointment, so my referral paper sat on my table until the referral literally expired. *insert feelings of shame*

-Put off scheduling my 2020 annual GYN appointment for months, because of the pandemic.

-Executive functioning struggles have prevented me from scheduling my appointment until recently, because my medication dosage needed to be increased, and I’ve been really busy.

-Given a referral for that same ultrasound, but at least I was provided additional information about who to call this time.

-Call to schedule radiology appointment as soon as I got home from appointment (higher medication dosage helps immensely with executive functioning).

-Sat on hold for 20 minutes.

-Receptionist, whose phone is crackling and I can only hear every other word she’s saying, tells me, verbatim, “your mammogram referral can’t be written this way. It has to be written differently.”

-Me: “What do you mean differently? How should it be written differently?”

-Receptionist: “It can’t be written this way. Your doctor will know how to write it.”

?????

-Call GYN back and tell them this, with what little information I have, and they tell me that they will have the doctor change it.

-And now…what? I wait? I don’t know how long until they will change it in the system so that I can call the radiologist back. My brain operates like: “now or never, and needs obvious but novel/unexpected visual cues to remember,” so there is a very short window of opportunity here to actually do this.

And people wonder why folks with ADHD struggle to take care of their health. It’s such a nightmare, every time, and any failure to navigate the system makes you feel incompetent and ashamed.

I wonder what they are dreaming about...

(via)

“The Ocean Dweller”

https://www.tumblr.com/blog/zacharyhunt-arts

To protect the innocent lives of strangers, he lost his wings and is only left with the scars

im. so tired lmfao, my hand hurts. so enjoy this preview!

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BIRB FACTS!!!!

do you have any cursed/blessed harris hawk facts?

Harris’s Hawks are the only pack-hunting raptor on the planet! they go after rabbits with tactics similar to those found in a pack of wolves, driving it away from cover until one of them can go down and nab it.

this also means they’re more social than other hawks, and will do things like stand on each other’s backs or hold hands for no reason

I can’t stop rereading this!

Interchangeable

Bully!College AU!Hawks x Reader | 12.2k words

Summary: Hawks is the only person who knows about your suicide attempt. Hawks is also the reason for your suicide attempt. He takes responsibility.

TW’s for suicide, depression, angst, guilt

I can’t call this a yandere story despite it being linked to Intertwined. There’s only perhaps two things that you could say are “yandere”,Hawks actually cleans up his act in this one. It’s a little more traditionally romantic.

IMPORTANT Story note, read fully: This won’t make much sense if you haven’t read Intertwined. this is not a chronological sequel to Intertwined, it’s more like another route that could’ve been taken. What I recommend doing is rereading up to the point where reader is phoning her parents about moving colleges, as this is where -for this fic- Intertwined stops and Interchangeable begins. You can read this without any of the yandere stuff, technically.

For those of us not wanting to reread, Hawks is at the point where he is still bullying the reader. The container incident hasn’t happened, Hawks hasn’t confessed his feelings.

We also assume a couple of things about the reader from Intertwined, we assume she’s depressed and that it’s at least partly due to Hawks.

Not so important A/N: the alternate summary for this is “Hawks daddy-doms you into getting better”. but there’s no daddy kink I swear. There is also no smut! Squeaky clean, as Jesus intended. I just wanna rip your heart out a little, that’s all.

this is awkward and im sorry that i can’t write angst or conventional romance. really bros… im just practising 

❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

Alone in your apartment, you sat in the bathroom, still dressed in your pyjamas as you listened to the tap dripping into the sink.

This was the dead end.

You couldn’t move colleges, only drop out and abandon the scholarship.

With a sense of self worth that had been deteriorating over the past seven years, you were left to bask in hatred and misery from your situation. There was no way you could stand another day of torment; your own humiliation from not being able to avoid it and the voice that perpetually mocked you.

You fiddled with the cuff of your pyjama bottoms. You were wasting time.

Nothing ever seemed to feel like it was worth doing. You’d constantly find yourself giving up in the middle of tasks or simply not taking them on at all, resorting yourself to lying in bed or pausing, standing there and waiting for motivation that never came. But this, this was doable.

When you looked over to the digital clock perched on your bathroom cabinet, you deduced that you were supposed to be at a lecture in five minutes. You weren’t going to go.

Just a little longer.

No note. Let them wonder.

You got up and opened the cabinet.

———

“Can you call her? Text her?”

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