What Really Gets Me About Sam Hate Is That 99% Of The Things He’s Hated For, When Applied To Real Life

what really gets me about sam hate is that 99% of the things he’s hated for, when applied to real life situations, are things that no-one should be hated for. not only that, but hating people for the things that sam is hated for would be considered victim blaming (that’s a mouthful)

hating someone for wanting to go to college and live their own life, instead of the unsafe and dangerous life their parent and sibling want them to live is not okay

hating someone for escaping an abusive household is not okay

hating someone for not trying to contact their family, after said family disowned them for going to college, is not okay

hating someone for having an addiction is not okay

hating someone for keeping something about themself a secret (especially if the person they’re keeping it secret from has previously shown how judgmental they are towards the things they’re hiding) is not okay

hating someone for trusting the wrong person, even tho that person went to extraordinary lengths to gain their trust, is not okay

hating someone for not blindly following their sibling’s every command is not okay

hating someone for unknowingly participating in causing something awful to happen, even tho they thought they were actually stopping the awful thing from happening, (especially when they willingly sacrificed themself and spend several lifetimes suffering in order to fix their mistake) is not okay

hating someone because they respected a mutual agreement and because they tried to move on with their life after losing someone is not okay

hating someone for trying to set boundaries after a person they trusted violated their bodily autonomy and for telling said person that they wouldn’t do the same thing to them is not okay

hating someone for expressing basic human emotions in a way that harms no-one is not okay

hating someone for standing up for themself is not okay

meanwhile 99% of the shit for which dean gets a pass, when applied to real life situations, would horrify any semi decent human being

telling your sibling that they deserved to be abused because they were out of line (in which being out of line actually means “you wanted to live your own life”) is not okay

vilifying someone for something they can’t change about themself is not okay

acting judgmental towards an aspect of someone’s life and then getting mad at them for keeping secrets regarding that same aspect is not okay

using someone’s faith to manipulate them into doing what you want is not okay

getting mad at someone for saving people’s lives, because you don’t like the method they’re using, is not okay

forcing someone into a torture-detox that almost kills them, then stalking them, calling them names, forcing them to choose between blindly following your every command and saving the world and then reducing the whole thing to “you chose someone else over me” is not okay

blaming someone for something you both unknowingly had a hand in, without taking responsibility for your own contribution, is not okay

deliberately hurting someone because their happy memories don’t include you is not okay

erasing someone’s memory without their consent is not okay

making someone’s mental illness all about yourself is not okay

blaming someone because another person cut their arm off (idk, this is the closest real life analogy to the soulless situation I can think of) is not okay

getting mad at someone for honouring a mutual agreement, berating them for leaving a job (a job you yourself had previously left) and going as far as shaming them for doing something as normal as shopping for produce instead of working is not okay

forcing someone to stay in a job they’re unhappy with is not okay

making someone think the person they love is in danger (especially if that someone already has a history of people they care about dying) is not okay

violating someone’s bodily autonomy and tricking them into allowing a foreign being inside their body without their consent, gaslighting them about it for months, making disgusting jokes about said violation, refusing to see the violated person’s point when they’re rightfully upset and not acknowledging that what you did was wrong, even after you went through the same experience, is not okay

telling someone that the upside of them being alive is that you need a sidekick is not okay

telling someone you wish they were dead is not okay

killing an innocent kid because of who their family is is not okay

literally trying to kill your sibling, repeatedly, is not okay (and I can’t believe I actually have to write this because the extents to which people will go to defend dean’s every action is /that/ ridiculous)

having a consistent pattern of doing things that you previously berated other people for doing is not okay

being misogynist, homophobic, ableist and racist because ~that’s just the way you were raised~ is not okay

trying to kill a child, telling said child that you will kill them and emotionally and verbally abusing them to the point of pushing them to self harm, because circumstances regarding their birth led to the death of people you care about and because their biological father is evil (two things they absolutely have no control over) is not okay

threatening a teenage girl with a gun because she doesn’t want to help you is not okay

acting entitled to know every detail about someone else’s life and getting mad at them for keeping secrets about themselves, all while you’re constantly keeping secrets, even about other people, is not okay

anyway my point is: sam hate isn’t actually about his actions, it’s about how the show and dean portray these actions. while dean negativity/hate (as rare as it is) is about his actions being objectively horrid