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Garashir be like: what if I forgave you for all your crimes that arent mine to forgive, my crimes arent even my own anyway?
What if you didn't think the crime of my existence abominable?
What if we were Angels cast down by our fathers, sheltered by foreign gods, defending lands we could never call home?
What if i didn't know how to be good? What if i didn't even know how to be myself?
What if i thought myself fundamentally unloveable? What if I loved you anyway?
What if it didn't matter? What if you were my only constant? What if I couldn't have you so i rebuilt my world in your image?
What if my arms remember the shape of you when all i am is rotted away?
#star trek ds9 #garak #dukat #damar #"plain-and-simple" garak #actually-simple damar
My favorite thing about Damar is that heâs just a dude. Garak and Dukat are constantly scheming, speaking in euphemisms all the time, never fully honest with anyone around them or even truly with themselves, and Damar is just like, there. Like he proves this isnât a Cardassian thing, theyâre just Like That.
Dukat, talking about killing someone: Iâll make the necessary arrangements to ensure theyâre properly taken care of.
Garak, talking about killing someone: You can rest assured I will do all that is in my power to make sure their stay is as pleasant as possible. But,, once theyâre back in their own ship, itâs simply out of my hands.
Damar, talking about killing someone: We should have them killed.
Is that a valid argument in your pants or is it just a phallacy?
It's both of them
The crash was sudden. Instinct brought him to his feet and took his eyes to the corners, the shadows--all empty. The world sharpened, every sound and movement painted across his senses in sudden vibrant color. Not an explosive. Ever since Ab-Tzenketh that was the first, quivering question his mind asked. Not an explosive. No steps, no voices. The walls were whole, and the silence remained undisturbed save for the quiet scrape of chair as the doctor stood. They stared suspiciously at one another across the stretch of table. âWhat was that?â Bashir asked finally. âYou tell me, Doctor.â âYou canât seriously think it has something to do with me?â Oh, I can, Doctor. But in this case, he didnât. The taut alertness in the doctorâs body was entirely unfeigned. âNo, merely that you have the better hearing.â âItâit came from the kitchen. Sounded like crashingâŠor falling.â Garakâs fingers found the grip of the disruptor tucked at his hip and pushed through into the kitchen. The room stood as placid as heâd left it, a few dishes sitting innocent on the counter, a half-drunk bottle of kanar decanted and casting a long, still shadow in the moonlight. Room empty. Windows unbroken. Blinds drawn. But somethingâsomething is differentâ The teapot. He found her sprawled, hidden by the bulk of the counter, at the jamb of the backdoor. The door itself lay cracked on its hinges, and, outside, the nightlocusts screeched, grating across the grayscale silence all around. Sheâd pulled a shelf down as she fell, the ceremonial teapot scattered in jagged crumbs around her. Garak had seen plenty of corpses in his time. After a while, contrary to what most imagined, one grew inured. Eventually the glazed serenity of the eyes, the stiffness of the limbs, the eerie stillness of chest and mouth were mere details to be noted just as one might note height or eye color or symmetry of face. No, the sight of death hadnât affected him for many years. What heâd never quite grown immune to was the sight of the dying. Shivering agony in the eyes. Fluttering, soundless lips. The clutch of handsâŠLoral⊠Every one of her gray hairs was still perfectly in place. It seemed obscene. âGarak? Is everything alright?â The humanâs voice was small. âOh, God. Is sheâwait--â Before Garak could object, the doctor was crouched beside him, finger to Loralâs ashen temple. He took two breaths, brow furrowed, then switched to her wrist. A terrible keening sound. The doctorâs voice transformed, calm and strong in a way Garak wouldnât have thought possible for one so young. âLoral, listen to me. You may be having a heart attack.â She shook her head in silent terror. Pressed her hand to the center of her chest. âYes, but itâs alright: I have everything necessary to handle it in the medkit downstairs.â Garak didnât register what he was saying until the doctorâs urgent, commanding eyes pressed against his. âIn the medkit downstairs.â Garak sprang to retrieve it. The medkit he found in the laboratory was Parmakâs, the rugged hide bag with the small stitching of the Hebitian sun on the corner. Garak had bought it when Parmak got his job with the Bureau. A gift. Had he left it here? Had heâ
Focus, Elim.
His error didnât occur to him until he was halfway back up the stairs. The door swept open in the moonlight. The screech of the insects⊠Damnit, you might as well have handed him the keys to skimmer and drawn him a map to the shuttleport. But, to his relief, the only move the doctor had made was to prop Loralâs back slightly with a tablecloth. He sat beside her talking in low, gentle tones. The boyâŠhadnât taken it. As easy an out as he was like to have, and heâd stayed. Perhaps heâd believed that bit about the theta-band detonator after all⊠Inside he quaked with a terrible mix of adrenaline and gratitude and fear, but the hand that extended the medkit to the doctor was as steady as ever. He looked at it with detached admiration. âThank you, Doctor.â The human didnât respond, lost in the medical scanner. A probeâs mistake, Elim. He could hear Tainâs voice, sharp with disgust. Sentiment has dulled your wits. Trying to stay out of the doctorâs way, he sat and took the old womanâs hand. Nowâs not the time, Father. The medical scanner beeped worryingly. One didnât have to be a doctor to recognize the urgency of the alarm. Loralâs eyes lolled in fear. Make yourself useful, for the love of State. You may not be able to handle her heart as the doctor can, but you can handle it in your own way⊠He forced a light expression. âLoral, if you wanted a day off, all you had to do was ask.â  A tug in her cheeks. Good. âYouâre not to die until youâve finished preparing the cakes for Union Day⊠and, you know, thinking on it, I havenât the first clue how to steam those Kârârausian silk tunics. Imagine! Me on Union Day without my silk tunics, Loral! A true tragedy.â The dry exhale of what might have been a chuckle. âNo, Iâm afraid youâre going to have to stick around a bit longer, my dear.â For the briefest of seconds, he felt Bashir glance up from the scanner. Their eyes met and something stirred. Deep, from a place he barely recognized. He hoped the doctor saw the same respect reflected back at him.
Illustration by me, @bleuuughhh-blog
Have this thing!
I find myself doubting my ability to choose an excerpt of the appropriate size and type to best represent this story and the scene I drew for it; not so long that it impedes on AC's delicately built intrigue, nor so short that it's impossible to get one's footing in the text. I doubt my ability to represent this scene well enough not just in my excerpt but also in my artwork: I doubt if it's detailed enough, well enough composed, *legible* enough.
What I don't doubt, however, is the stunning quality of the story from which this scene comes, nor the extent to which I will endorse it and sing its praises. Hats off to you @alphacygni and your phenomenal fic from years ago lol. It's irreparably changed my brain chemistry and my standard for both romances and tragedies alike. I hope you don't mind the continuous art posts and tags because I definitely have more scenes to create and share!
Anyone feel free to ask me for Garashir scribbles BTW. I do art for a living and doing dumb lil doodles helps me relax and sometimes get out of artist's block. Still exploring and learning in this absolutely wonderful fandom đ
Click the first image to see the hairs on Bashir's lil head better
Garak in his Pussy Galore outfit saying he's "not too sure about the collar."
Julian. Are you aware how low of a cut he's willing to go for you? Do you know what kind of plunging necklines he would put on for you? You could put him in an outfit that would make any other Cardassian pass out or throw up. You could see his titty spoon if you wanted. You could see his cleavage and you're putting him in a turtleneck? You are interfering with his ability to slut it up, and he wants to slut it up for you.
Julian is moping about turning 30 in a universe where humans regularly live to 150.
You vain little twink.
My faaaaaaavorite thing that Garak calls Julian in the lovely meadow of fics for them is "Impertinent Boy" đ makes me all warm and fuzzy inside hehe *kicks feet* đ
Putting out what sketchiness I can cause like idk if I'm just lazy but EVEN MY STUPID SIMPLE DRAWINGS take like a day to realize. I have 20000000 WIPs rn pls accept this
anyone remember what these things are called like little cartoony expressive doohickies i think they have a real name but i canât remember
I didnât know I couldnât reblog posts with a video lol so i have to do the context again, but heres a video of my dog Pearl who passed 3 days ago. She loved to watch ds9 with me and got SO stressed when she thought I didnât realise it was on? Here she is Pleading to be allowed on my lap, because the possibility of missing out on quark made her experience levels of anxiety that could only be recreated in a lab
Sorry I acted romantic and delusional again, you can kill me if you want
I'm a nerd and I draw and right now I'm so hyperfixated on Star Trek I made a Tumblr, an ao3, and a Pinterest for it. ao3: CharcoalSavvy
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