Legit Johnlock Scenes

“And I have been hand-pulled in an elevator”

-Martin Freeman

Martin and Ben on Martin’s last day of The Hobbit filming…

A Study In Pink [Sherlock] : what I retained

John: life is shit

Psy: ok

John: war

Psy: ok thank u now pay me

*some war nightmares and a gun later, in a park*

John: *life is shit face*

Mike: hey im the fat dude remember

John: hey life is shit, also war

Mike: cool, lemme introduce you to my sociopath gay friend who is not my friend because i dissappear from the whole serie after I make you two fall in love forever

John: what

Mike: eheh

*in a room with a dead body, a sociopath and a rejected girl loving dead bodies and sociopaths*

Mike: yo

Sherlock: *gay look towards the new pretty soldier* im interested but not showing it cause im a queen

John: here take my phone and all my clothes if you need

Sherlock: oW

Sherlock: afghanistan or Iraq

Sherlock: also Molly lol you ugly

John: * .....has stop working....*

Mike: eheh

Sherlock: i like cute blond army soldiers lets live together and do everything together from now

John: sounds good i dont find this creepy at all

Sherlock: *winks*

John:♡o♡

Mike: eheh

*new home*

Sherlock: call me by my first name but you can call me how you want i dont care. love me please

Mrs.Hudson: look at my gay baby boys

John: no

Sherlock: thank you

John: what a shit decoration taste

John: also you're pretty but you're website is shit

Sherlock: this was rude but you're cute

Sherlock: wanna see a corpse

John: wow so romantic im coming

*around a corpse*

Sherlock: deductions deductions deductions

John: how marvelous

John: take me

Lestrade: im out

Donovan: the psycho is a bitch

John: no you

*somewhere we dont care in london*

Mycroft: im the master of cameras

John: Ridiculous. I wanna find my new boyfriend

Mycroft: also the master of mysterious cabs

John: ok

John: hey you're a girl so im flirting with you because im not gay and im not into the cheekbones guy

Anthea: do i look like i give a shit

John: *entering another dark place* ridiculous.

Mycroft: i wanna scare you

John: ridiculous

Mycroft: look at my pretty umbrella

John: i just wanna go home you weirdo

Mycroft: i know everything about you

John: lol big coat man already did that im not impressed anymore

John: also war

Sherlock: *texting his new boyfriend*

John: gotta go, bye bitches

John: jusg taking my gun on my way

Anthea: do I look like I give a shit

*with pretty boyfriend*

Sherlock: lol nothing just wanted to see you

John: i find this perfectly normal

Sherlock: text a serial killer please

John: okay

John: wait wha-

Sherlock: you're better looking than my skull friend

Sherlock: date?

John: YES

John: I mean no because im not gay but YES

*during the not gay date*

Angelo: you cute and gay

Sherlock: thank you

John: no

Sherlock: eat

John: ok

Angelo: here some gay candles

John: no

Sherlock: thank you

John: you single?

Sherlock: this is literally a date

John: no

Sherlock: i dont like girls

John: cool

John: I keep that information

John: for no gay reason

John: *bi lipslicking*

Sherlock: RUN

John: WHEREVER YOU GO

Sherlock: lol it was a test, means you dont need your cane

John: what cane?

Sherlock: why are there idiots in our flat

Anderson: *idiots stuff*

Sherlock: *clash*

John: dats my boy

Sherlock: I solved the case

Cabbie: cool now come so i can kill you

Sherlock: no

Cabbie: but it's fun

Sherlock: ok

John: why the hell nobody noticed that the super annoying good looking detective left

Anderson: he is a psycho

John: oh you're the boyfriend of the bitch you bitch

*somewhere lost and dark that we can easily find with a gps*

Sherlock: im smarter

Cabbie: im smarter

Sherlock: this is a fake gun

Cabbie: you're smarter

Sherlock: but im playing your game anyway because my life is boring and death is fun

Cabbie: *gets shot*

Sherlock: oh no but this is not fun

Sherlock: how do i know if im the smarter now

Dying cabbie: moriarty

Sherlock: lets go for two seasons then

Sherlock: means 5 more episodes lol

*among useless policemen and police cars doing beep beep*

Lestrade: put the blanket on

Sherlock: I dont need a blanket dad i worked hard dad

Lestrade: who shot

Sherlock: my deduction skills tell me it's a cute blond army doctor but ive no idea who

John: *is here and good looking but still no gay*

Sherlock: oops

Lestrade: can you repeat everything because I'm cute and nice but not very smart

Sherlock: nope

Sherlock: but im putting the blanket on, look dad

Lestrade: it's all fine then

Sherlock: *throws the blanket away to look good in front of cute blond army doctor*

John: look at my innocent face

Sherlock: this shot was quite badass

John: okay it was me

Sherlock: hot

John: I know right

Mycroft: and now do i scare you

John: youve got a serious problem

Sherlock: stop playing with my date you little shit bro im the queen

John: okay weird fam

John: you idiot

Sherlock: ok but you're so cute when you say that

Sherlock: take me

John: what

Sherlock: another not gay date?

John: yes yes yes yes

John: with candles

Mycroft: ok i ship them

Anthean: do I look like I give a shit again

Teen Stephen, in church: dear God, if you’re trying to punish me for being too kinky...

Stephen: do it harder daddy~

Benedict from Hollywood Reporter interview (X) Benedict are you high on caffeine again