Was Doing Something Unrelated But

Was doing something unrelated but

Can you imagine a world where nobody knows the batkids are actually Batman's children and hence, when they hear them yelling at each other "I'll report this to Batman!" They think it's actually serious team discussion

And they don't know that for them it literally translates into "I'm telling dad!"

Like, You see Nightwing arguing with Red Hood and going "Oh, i'm SO reporting this to Batman"

"OH NO, YOURE NOT"

"YES I AM"

And everyone else thinks this is serious? And it could affect Hood's status as an ally?

But really is just Dick telling his little brother he's snitching about his broken arm to their dad-

Or you see Red Robin trying to bribe Robin and Spoiler "I'm reporting your actions to Batman"

"Yeah, gotta start the report about it, and he's going to be so-"

"... How much?"

And they smile maliciously, and anyone else thinks RR did something REALLY bad but it's just that he exceeded his weekly allowed coffee and his sibblings found out

Because they also do it to other people, like Tim does it to Supes when he's arguing with Kon-

More Posts from Batcasscainman and Others

1 month ago

Cass knows because of body language but thinks it’s the funniest thing ever and is NOT a snitch.

AU where Jason gets over his theatre-kid need for dramatics and heat never reveals his identity to the batfam. In fact, he HIDES his identity so well that no one ever finds it out. It’s been years since Red Hood popped up and at this point he’s an unofficial vigilante with crime lord tendencies than anything else

then people start getting suspect . . . But not the right thing

Red hood: *sitting, legs crossed, on a roof ledge* scare me and make me drop my book and l don’t care if you helped me with Penguin last night, I’ll throw you off this roof and I won’t give a shit Nightwing: *slowly jacks away* um. What book? Red hood: pride and prejudice. Nightwing: pride and . . . You know, my brother liked that book. Red hood: I know he did Nightwing:

Damian: *feeling uncertain with his title as Robin* Red Hood: you know, a wise kid once said Robin is magic Batman: *eyes narrow* what kid? Red Hood: eh, just someone I used to know Batman:

Spoiler: so why did ya decide to protect the alley? Red Hood: I lived there as a kid. I . . . Uh, it just means a lot to me. Spoiler: *frowning* I assumed you’d lived there. Red Hood: yeah it um . . . *thinking of Bruce* I met someone important there. He changed my life. And when . . . I, uh, lost him, I decided to clean it up. Spoiler:

Later, in the bat cave:

Spoiler: so Red Hood . . . Batman: *gravely* dated Jason. Nightwing: but he was only fifteen! Robin: *crossing his arms* people date at fifteen, Richard. Red Robin: . . . The crime lord dated the second Robin. Batman: I’m going to kill him. Nightwing: wait, no! You can’t! Jason wouldn’t have wanted it! Black Bat: he’s family. Spoiler: *jazz hands* NEW BROTHER

Red Hood: *listening in through their comms* what the fuck

3 months ago

cain and bruce and cass are sooo interesting to me... long rambles (with comic panel receipts!) under the cut (also batgirl 2000 spoilers)

Cain had tried many times before to make The One Who Is All, but Cassandra is special in a way the others weren't because she worked. She didn't defy instructions, she was amazing at combat, she didn't go insane, she was perfect. And David grew to love her in a way he hadn't loved the others, even though he hurt her, because it was the price he had to pay to get his little girl perfect. Yes he shot her, but it was to keep her on her toes, and she had to be that to be perfect - it’s the price he has to pay. He rarely touched her, because it was a price he had to pay, but in the times that he did, he cuddled with her on the rooftop and pointed to the stars. He couldn't talk to her, because it was a price he had to pay, but he could make their own little language and keep her progress on tapes.

And when the time came for her first real foray into being The One Who is All, he dresses her up in a frilly pink dress and pigtails.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

And she runs away and David doesn't know what to do. The first kill is always hard, he made her do it too soon, too young, she wasn’t ready, he knows it’s his fault.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

And then, years later, when his baby girl is almost an adult (but really he'll always see her as that little girl with pigtails and a bloody pink dress on), he meets her again and she yells at him to stop.

And he cries, because it was the price he had to pay, but his daughter can understand him now, fully, and she's using it to ask him to stop, so how can he say no to that? Now they're dangling over an edge and he's pleading for her to hold on but she can't, she won't, and she survives anyway like she always will but she survives in a cape and ears and a bat across her chest.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

David thought that Bruce was perfect when they were training, but he wasn't. He wouldn't kill. But maybe he can be good enough for David's perfect little girl anyway because she won’t either, and god knows David isn't perfect. So he concocts a test, and tries his damndest to keep those tapes of his daughter because that's all he has left of her.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

David loves Cass with all of his heart, but his heart isn't big enough to fit things like hugs and speaking and care. The biggest problem is that he sees her as a weapon first, no matter what.

Bruce isn't like that. Cassandra isn't a weapon— she's a bat, of course, she’s perfect for it! And to be the bat, yeah, you have to make sacrifices sometimes. Keeping your identity a secret is much easier when you have no (legal, public) identity to speak of, and he doesn’t understand when Barbara insists on frivolous things like vacations, identities, names, and peace. Why call the girl Cass when she can simply be Batgirl?

If Bruce had a choice, he would just be the bat. And so this girl who is just like him— better, even! Well, of course she’d agree. Yes, she’s young, she’s just seventeen, but… come on. You can barely say a perfect soldier like her is a kid, still. And it’s tragic that Cain made her like this, made her like them, but… it happened. She is like this. So why wouldn’t he help her use it for good? 

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

He never had to teach Batgirl, this girl who is just like him, about the value of life. Her hits are perfect and measured, to knock them out and nothing more. The first thing he noticed about her was her willingness to die and insistence that no one else does, and he encourages these things. 

And her death wish is ineffective and annoying and dangerous, but it’s inescapable and she doesn’t let it affect her missions anymore.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

Batman asks Batgirl if the dozens of lives saved because of what she did is enough. She says no, and he says good. 

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

When Batgirl loses some of her skills, she runs at an armed man and gets shot 4 times (one in each thigh, one through her shoulder, one in her stomach). But she survives anyway, like she always will, and when she wakes up Batman asked why she did it. She responds instinct. He says, “Good.”

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

Then he finds out about her upcoming fight with Shiva. Batgirl knows that she will lose. This is not a competition or arrogance for her— this is suicide. She needs to move past this death wish and… well. She might not move… past it, per se, but she will be rid of it, and perhaps the world will become of rid of her. But it’s necessary. So he lets her leave, because he knows she needs to do this. At least she will die with honor.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

Later, when she survives even after dying, because she always survives, Batman needs to do something. Something dangerous and reckless and, maybe, a bit suicidal. Batgirl wants to help but he just says “I let you fight Shiva because it was something you had to do for yourself. Don’t say thank you. Return the favor.” 

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under

The tragedy of Batman and Batgirl is unlike the tragedy of David Cain and The One Who Is All, where she is only an assassin to her father— not even that, just a killing weapon. It’s unlike the tragedy of Cassandra and Sandra, where she is just a pawn for her mother’s suicide. And it is especially unlike the tragedy of Babs and Cassie, where she is seen by her mom as so much less than she is, as something that she can never be— regular. Normal. Innocent.

No, the tragedy of Batman and Batgirl is that her dad sees Cassandra as, yes, eventually a daughter, certainly a soldier, but most of all, an extension of himself. And he does not treat himself very well, or with much caution, or with any gentleness.

Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
Cain And Bruce And Cass Are Sooo Interesting To Me... Long Rambles (with Comic Panel Receipts!) Under
3 months ago

Cass's civilian identity being paper thin is so important to me actually. Barely anyone on the street knows Bruce Wayne's daughter and any of the press who are interested can't uncover a single thing other than him adopting her when she was 19. It leads to a whole lot of speculation but no actual facts.

Meanwhile you have assassins who are the best of the best, the cream of the crop, and anyone who is someone in the evil assassin underworld knows all about David Cain and his daughter who turned rogue and became Batgirl.

Which means most of them see her with Bruce Wayne and are like ohoho a clever plan by Batman indeed! Putting Batgirl undercover as Bruce Wayne's daughter to guard and protect Wayne, who's a key part of all the recent projects to improve Gotham City. Masterful gambit Mr Batman sir, you also get a spy who reports on everything Wayne's doing whenever you need it.

This gives Cass the freedom to not even try to hide herself behind some sort of helpless civilian persona. Attempted kidnappings of Bruce Wayne and his kids have dropped by 90% since she got adopted, as the first one to try and take a fancy party hostage got the shit kicked out of him by Cassandra Wayne while her father watched proudly.

The next attempt brought a gun and she disarmed him then broke his hand. Finally they sent a whole squad of mercenaries to kidnap Bruce and Tim on the way to a W.E business meeting only to find Cass in the car with them. The kidnapping did not go as planned and the goons have several questions as to why the fuck Bruce Wayne's daughter is a metahuman who dodges bullets. They never get answers.

She's the only batkid who never has to fake her abilities. Damian is highly indignant about this but she just pokes his forehead and tells him it's a skill issue when he complains.

4 months ago

I don't think that the civilians in the DC universe are picky with regards to who's saving the day, per se, but they are very attached to their respective local superheroes and are extremely sensitive and scrutinizing if someone unfamiliar shows up. Like there is a general understanding that superheroes aren't tied to their respective cities 100% of the time, but there's also a very intense Local Civilian Vibe Check if you're superheroing on someone else's turf.

POV: You have just stopped a rampaging supervillain in downtown Metropolis (You are Booster Gold):

I Don't Think That The Civilians In The DC Universe Are Picky With Regards To Who's Saving The Day, Per
3 months ago
Yeah

Yeah

1 week ago

My favorite little headcanon is Chewie knew exactly who Obi-Wan was and was like: yeah don't worry my guy is solid he can get you to Alderaan. No no, he won't recognise you or ask questions, trust me. I don't even think he knows what a Jedi is. He is not big on historical non-fiction.

5 months ago

I'm always on my Bruce acted like Damian when younger shit, but I'm also on my Oliver was eerily similar to Cass when young bullshit

Look, that man might have been stranded on an island for a year(s) but no other person would get into that situation and decide that the most reasonable choice was to dismantle the drug ring on the island with nothing but a bow and barely any training.

So I like to think that Ollie was always a little fucked, just uncomfortably wrong in a way that most people wouldn't understand. that actually being why Bruce likes him when they first meet.

Him being unnaturally quiet, not when speaking of course, it's Oliver Queen, no one can get him to be quiet when speaking unless he wanted to, but quiet in the way of being able to sneak up on people without even trying. Just appearing in a room and scaring everybody, even when someone is keeping an eye on him, he'll inevitably slip away and reappear a few hours later in a place that he's not supposed to be.

when Bruce and Ollie first met, Bruce liked him because he kinda scared the shit out of him, there was a look to him that just set off of the warning signs in Bruce's head and of course that means that he needed to friends with Ollie immediately.

And later, when Bruce's mouth inevitably got him into trouble, he never had to worry about what would happen after he won because Oliver would always jump in first. people learned very quickly that you can't fuck with one of them without the other being there too.

in the first few months of Oliver being the GA, Batman comes to Starling for something and tries to slip away after being spotted, but Oliver is able to hunt him through the city. No matter what Bruce tries, GA is always two steps behind and getting closer. finally Bruce is able to lose him at the edge of town (Oliver doesn't lose him, he just knows that Batman is leaving and sees no reason to keep going after him) and decides right then that the Green Arrow is never allowed within Gotham, that no other vigilante is allowed in Gotham.

Years down the line, after the JL is up and both of them are in it, Bruce questions whether he should tell Ollie that he's the Bat, but Oliver already knows, has know since the first time that they fought side by side, because no one has fit so perfectly beside him since those days in school. the days that he was the blinding sunlight in front, the fist that everyone paid attention to, so no one noticed the dark shape in the shadows Oliver had cast, the knife that you didn't even realizes was there until it was being pulled out of your ribs. of course Oliver knew that Bruce was Batman, he would have shot him with an arrow on that first mission if he hadn't.

3 months ago

You don't understand, I want Jason and Cass to resent each other.

I want them to walk out of the room as soon as the other steps in.

I want them to scowl every time someone else brings up their name. They try not to, try to disguise it as something else, but they grew up in a family of detectives.

I want Tim and Steph to try patching things up between them by pretending they forgot they invited the other to the hang out and everyone has to play along with the frigid silence. Eventually they stop accepting Tim's and Steph's vague invites.

I want Bruce's heart to ache as he rearranges a patrol schedule because they can't be paired together, not again.

I want guilt to eat at Damian and Duke when they compliment one in front of the other because it feels like stabbing the back of The Sibling Who Gets It.

I want someone to joke exactly once that Cass should have been Jason's Batgirl and that person feels a chill like someone walked over their grave.

I want them to see the worst of themselves reflected in each other.

1 week ago

Interviewer, catching Damian in costume: Robin! Can you explain the process of picking up Robin or passing on the mantle?

Damian, mildly annoyed at Bruce at the moment: It's quite simple. Batmam steals young children from their bed, usually nine or ten or so. Then he takes you to his lair and give you a deal.

Damian: If you can beat him in a game of your choosing, he will train you to be Robin. If you lose, you are eaten. I beat him in a classic fencing game. He's quite good with swords, but he wasn't very good with the sport itself.

Tim, standing next to him: Yeah, I beat him at a memory card game. I like totally cheated, but I'm too old for him to eat now, so ot doesn't matter.

Damian, nodding: Yes. The worst part of the job is disposing of failed Robins bones. He usually sucks them clean and leaves them all over the floor.

Tim: Yeah, its messy. But after you hit, like 15 he stops trying to eat you, so that's cool.

Damian: I have not yet reached 15. I'm still in danger. If you have more questions, ask Nightwing, as he was the first to avoid being eaten.

-

Same interviewer, at a different date: Mr. Nightwing. Is it true Batman tries to eat potential Robins?

Dick, who has no idea what she's taking about: Yeah, it's really scary. His jaw unhinges like a snake.

3 weeks ago

The first and last time I went to Red Hood's subreddit I saw a comment complaining that everyone is convinced Cass can beat Jason in a fight and their argument was 'jason can shoot her, what would she do after that'...like jason would even get a chance to pull out a gun on cass😭😭 also cass has been shot at since like the age of three. just take the l and move on.

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