Didn’t You Know You’d Get What Was Coming To You?

I wish I knew how to write

Love letters, sonnets, words that would trace your

Lips over and over

Till you feel you can’t breathe

And are only craving to inhale me.

“I have but one passion ; it swallows up every other ; it dwells with my darling books, and is fed by the treasures of beauty and wisdom which they contain.”

— Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley, Lodore

CUT FROM THE SOURCE 

I had to let go, 

All those things you said I was 

I unraveled, 

Became undone, 

My bones melted, 

My heart unrest- 

For it won’t stop beating, 

Beating, beating 

Because it knows no less 

I became unplugged, 

Undressed in your layers of 

Manipulation, 

Unleashed from your cage from 

All the ways you  Underestimated me.

JERK

NO. You haven’t heard me. 

Words don’t flow like they use to, 

Movements don’t bloom like they use to, 

Moments don’t fly like they use to. 

You don’t even know the beginning of it. 

Chances? Won’t let me take them. 

Laughter, you know it so very well. 

Mocking is second nature. 

JERK- 

Oh wait, that’s me. 

I’m sorry, was it something you thought?

You contort your body like it's written in your code, 

Come hear me hiss. Fear not, I don’t bite-  Waiting for your calculated strike.

virginia woolf's 1931 new years resolutions : "to have none. not to be tied. to be free & kindly with myself. sometimes to read, sometimes not to read. to go out, yes—but stay at home in spite of being asked. as for clothes, i think to buy good ones."

Again, they come running to my call of distress

only to burrow in my skin and call me delicate

their stinger falling off upon entry

They want to peel off each layer to watch it grow back shiny and new.

They choke for me as I swallow their marbles but they won’t bleed for me

won’t breathe for me

and my humming bird heart won’t sway

nor listen to what you have to say

won’t cry as you break my bones

Reading a book that was released more than five years ago and coming here on Tumblr to talk about it is like coming to the party so late that you missed even the after-party of said party and now everything that's left are a few fanarts you stumble upon by almost lucky accident and someone tumbleweeds of posts long forgotten.

I lost every friendship I ever had and it still hurts.

1. Finneas O’Connell / 2. Ocean Vuong / 3. adampvrrish / 4. Otessa Moshfegh / 5. Fairycosmos / 6. Richard Siken / 7. frenchtoastlesbian

KNITTED 

She had knit you a sweater, 

You wear it every day. 

You’ve had it sixteen years so- 

It’s to no surprise that you'd never throw it away. 

The threads follow you like a trail of shadows, 

It’s thin and damaged

It smells of hard work 

She had knit you a sweater, 

You wear it every day

You say it’s disgusting 

But you never cleaned it anyway. 

She had knit you a sweater, 

You hate it with such pain 

A repost of some of my writing…

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