Hey If Ur Ever Feelin Shitty Use This

all right. so. this is a Harry Potter AU, in rambly and abbreviated form.

this is a version of events where, on the morning of November 1st, 1981, the police are called to a house in Surrey.

when they arrive, a large man with a red face and a moustache is waiting for them, brandishing a baby.

to be more accurate: he is brandishing a basket. the basket contains a baby.

he tells the police that his wife found the basket on their doorstep that morning. “Gave her the shock of her life,” he says, with a chuckle that does not seem the least bit sincere.

the police officers have a lot of questions about this, but the man does not have any useful answers. his wife, he tells them, is not in any shape to be interviewed. “she’s been poorly,” he says, “and we’ve got a baby of our own to worry about, keeping us up at all hours.”

the baby in the basket seems to be about a year old. he is cheerful, seems healthy aside from a cut on his forehead, with a crooked sticking plaster on it. he has startlingly green eyes.

there is no identifying information in the basket, except for a torn scrap of paper with ‘his name is Harry’ on it in a delicate hand.

there is nothing else to be done, it seems. the officers take baby Harry, and leave.

one of them comes back a few days later for a follow-up interview with the woman who found the baby. she seems a little fragile, and her own baby, in the next room, keeps up a constant shrieking tantrum the whole time the officer is there. “I’m sorry,” the woman says, with a brittle smile. “this has all been a bit much. I recently lost my sister, you see.”

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I love grandma activities… sleeping early, drinking tea, knitting, buying ugly sweaters and tacky clothing, gardening, feeding all the neighbourhood cats, sewing… Im all abt that!

I know life is hard but somewhere on earth a little transmasc child has found a bug and is chasing his sister around the yard in circles with it. And a little transfemme child just got into her mother’s makeup and looked at herself with poorly applied paint and smiled. Okay?

Original caption:

I think there’s something to be said about how much you can plan a trip, what you think you need and what you want to see. You can put all the effort, thought and research into things, but when push comes to shove you’re out there, and things change. Sometimes it’s for the better and sometimes it’s frustratingly worse, but it’s all a part of the journey.

The Moment is a short film that’s about just this. With the support of a Sprinter van from VanCraft, we spent 5 weeks getting as deep into the North American winter as we could, in an attempt to find out what really inspires us as respective filmers, photographers and skiers…

Project Sponsor: Vancraft (van-craft.com)

Narration: Tim Clark (@timclark1) Skier: Coen Bennie-Faull (@howyacoen) Filmed/Edited by: Hayden Griffith (@hayden.griffith)

Goddamit, Typhoid Mary

This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8

“Meow!”

Video by I_am_puma

jasoncharleshill Somewhere down south, New Zealand.

Why don't they make stained glass fish tanks? Give those fish Catholic guilt

This is… this is neither of those things

Agate with flower fossils.