Diary Entry #9

I’M BACK BITCHES

Diary Entry #20

I got a binder and two packers!!! Too bad I can't wear them basically anywhere lmao but still. I cleaned my room with my binder on. I was so worried it wasn't making me flat enough, i mean it doesn't matter now but when I go on T it might.

I made sure to order the right size but after like an hour of wearing it I still kinda hurt. But I'm okay now (it's my second time wearing it, first time wearing it for any significant amount of time.)

I went down a very brief spiral (brief being like 15 minutes tops) where I was like "OH MY GOD WHAT IF I'M NOT TRANS." But looking back, I think it's because my binder didn't make me like 100% flat, more like I have pecs or maybe gynomastia and I'm pretty sure now that's what it was.

But seeing me in pictures with my binder (with my face/hair mostly cropped out) on made me super happy, it's just that looking at me irl still makes me think I look very fem because I still have these fem characteristics and it makes me feel kinda bad. My spiral was not very rational.

I think the thought "what if my binder doesn't actually bind enough?? What if I still look like I have a large chest??" isn't actually very cis, looking back on it. I'm gonna post some pictures of me in a shirt with and without the binder and let y'all be the judge. I think I'm just freaking out over nothing, but I can't stop thinking like that. Under the cut btw, first pic with binder second pic w/o.

a peppino to make me (and you) feel better

words cannot describe the childlike wonder and joy felt when you enter a restaurant and they have those fancy soda machines capable of creating Wondrous Concoctions

I have been thinking the last several days about the horror of being mutilated as a intersex baby, or an intersex teen/kid. I'm perisex, and over the last few years (mostly in the last year) are the only times I've heard about intersex people.

How can this happen to so many people?? How has this gone under the radar?? It's a human rights abuse, and nobody is doing anything about it. Sometimes I can be naïve, but I would hope that the world isn't this cruel.

I have a lot to learn about a lot of things, but I hope to learn as much as I can.

Sorry if this sounds stupid

people really fail to see the physical violence behind the hyperinvisibility of intersex people.

we are erased in legislation and society broadly but we are also victims of an extermination campaign.

our invisibility doesn't come from people just failing to recognize us it comes from the fact that we are mutilated at birth and if we are not mutilated at birth we are mutilated at puberty. people without variations that can be changed by surgery are put on hormones against their will. it is rare to find an intersex person who hasn't experienced medical violence!

so many intersex people don't even know that they, themselves are intersex! some people have their intersex variation hidden from them, being outright lied to by parents and doctors about their own body. other people are never given the word intersex, they are told they have a DSD (disorder of sexual development), that they have a medical problem. almost no intersex person is told that they are intersex by a doctor.

our lack of visibility is written in literal blood. so when someone tries to say "well, intersex people don't have it that bad, no one is thinking about them" they're saying that all this "isn't so bad" that an effective extermination campaign "isn't that bad" because they can't see it happening.

Holy shit,,, i rember 💡

Popee the performer or whatever!!

top 5 strangest crossovers

And this

If they talk about Trump in a positive light one more goddamn time I am going to kill myself :) /hj

They still think that I'm on the Trump Train (what my grandpa calls it,,, *vomits*)

[ID: a crudely drawn person giving a thumbs up while crying. The caption says "Me trying not to scream but instead half-heartedly agree when my grandparents say shitty things /END ID]

Dark room shower supremacy ‼️

Thank you... assfuckmcgriddle... awesome cat

Be gay, trans and alive