I Am Not Your Asian American Doll: A Comic For AAPI Heritage Month 2023

A large pair of unsettling eyes with ringed pink irises stare at a nude pink girl with straight black hair. She is clenched in its oversized white fist. Pink hands of various shades reach up from the bottom of the page. Text reads: [FETISHIZATION IS NOT REPRESENTATION IS NOT APPRECIATION IS NOT RESPECT]
A girl with light pink skin and black hair holds a pink glittery mask over her face. It is titled so a single weeping eye is visible. A thick black bar crosses the red background behind her. Text reads: [YOUR GLORIFICATION OF THE PALATEABLE AESTHETICS OF MY CULTURE IS NOT REVERENCE]
A chunky black silhouette stands against a pink background covered in images of singing kpop girl idols. Inside the figure, text reads: [AND EVEN AS YOU MEMORIZE THE PHONETICS OF YOUR FAVORITE KPOP CHORUS YOU STILL MISPRONOUNCE MY LAST NAME]
An assortment of Asian food on pink dishes is arranged on a black background, including shrimp tempura, chicken curry, gyoza, soup dumplings, pork katsu, white rice, miso soup, kimchi, tteokbokki, kimbap, sushi, and ramen. Text reads: [YOU ENJOY EATING OUR FOOD BUT YOU DENY US A SEAT AT THE TABLE.]
Two white silhouettes pose with a selfie stick against the Seoul skyline. White clouds and a plane stand in the pink sky. Below that, red fire consumes the background. Below that still, the background turns to black. Text reads: [YOU FANTASIZE THAT ASIAN COUNTRIES ARE A DREAMLAND YOU CAN ESCAPE TO… ALL THE WHILE IGNORING THE UGLY SCARS COLONIALISM HAS LEFT ON OUR HISTORIES… AND HOW WE ARE STILL PICKING UP THE PIECES IMPERIALISM HAS LEFT BEHIND]
A girl with flowing black hair and pink skin weeps into her hands. Her tears are blood, and the wind seems to blow cuts across her body. Text reads: [YOU SPEAK OVER OUR VOICES, BUT YOU ARE SILENT AS WE ARE HARASSED AND KILLED]
A white background is consumed by pink and reds at the bottom. Four black panels form a two-by-two grid, each of them showing a sexualized Asian girl drawn in red lines. The first, a girl in an Orientalist belly dancer costume; the second, a girl in a maid dress; the third, a schoolgirl in uniform; the fourth, in an oversexualized qipao with a slit along the thigh. Text reads: [GOD FORBID AN ASIAN PERSON EXISTS OUTSIDE OF YOUR IDEAL CONSUMMABLE PACKAGE: QUIET AND DEMURE AND POLITE AND CUTE]
A drawing of a girl with shoulder-length hair and a hanbok against a pink background. A black bar blocks out her eyes, white text on it reading: [I AM NOT YOUR ASIAN AMERICAN DOLL]

I Am Not Your Asian American Doll: a comic for AAPI Heritage Month 2023

I usually spend a lot of time editing and fine-tuning my comics so that they come across as polite and inoffensive. But honestly, I’m really tired of the way Asian cultures and countries are treated / talked about while Asian people themselves are excluded, and thought it was about time I really let my rage out lol.

id in alt

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1 year ago
asathorin - Titled

Ma Xiuying from the Radiant Emperor duology!

Design/research notes under the cut

The characters read 馬秀英 (Pinyin: mǎ xiù yīng), her personal name, and 孝慈高皇后 (xiào cí gāo huáng hòu), her name as Empress.

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While Shelley Parker-Chan takes many liberties, the books are still set in a very specific time period, which is both a blessing and a curse. Most readily accessible resources will tell you about dynasties, which can span hundreds of years, and the duology takes place in a transitional period. So how to dress a Semu girl from the Yuan dynasty who lives with Nanren rebels wanting to revive the Song dynasty and who later becomes the first Ming empress?

Let's go through them one by one. The best resource was this book which is on the Internet Archive. I disregarded Mongol and Semu influences for the design since clothing is very much political and a way to either stand out or fit in with the surrounding society, see for example Wang Baoxiang wearing a topknot in Khanbaliq. Ma, I imagine, would want to fit in with the Nanren around her, so she's pretty much wearing the attire of Han women under Yuan rule. For the hair I went for something that looks youthful while being plausible, though I found very little on hair in this period, so who's to say.

The next one is from a specific scene in the book, so there is some description to go on: red, long sleeves with gold embroidery, high hair, red and gold ribbons. Since this is the scene where Ma declares herself queen and future empress in front of the Red Turban, it has to be a very deliberate dress. It therefore takes inspiration from Song aristocrats' broad-sleeved gowns as well as from 翟衣 (dí yī), the highest ceremonial gown of both Song and Ming empresses. (Some examples for 翟衣 are in this post, which also features the bird shaped crown I just had to include, and this post.) Her hair still has the loops, but it's much more sculpted.

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(Some additional, historically irrelevant notes: I realized too late that a right-to-left timeline might be more appropriate. Oh well! Also, how the colours photograph frustrates me, I swear I did not make her this deathly pale. And finally, some of the characters look a bit smudged because my cat spilled water on them. I did what I could to save them.)


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asathorin - Titled
Titled

overcome with emotion and lobster

204 posts

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