Just a wee vent hahaha. (it's 1718 words long.) Vent under the cut! Sorry if it makes zero sense, I don't vent at all but I needed to let stuff out
I hate hearing the noises in my head. It’s like they’re banging on the sides of my skull causing it to echo in my ears. I just wish I could do something worth living. I wish all the abuse and the pain I went through fucking killed me so I could finally be free from the sound. I want to find peace. And quiet. I want to be free from the pain everyone has caused me throughout the years so I can finally sleep knowing I’ll be free from every thought that clouds my head 24/7. I wish I actually felt sympathy for my mother all the time instead of when i’m high. I wish all the people who wronged me would see that I didnt deserve that. I was just a kid when I was forced to learn how to be an adult, and I don’t want to be an adult anymore. I want to be free. I want to feel like I’m swimming. Deeper and Deeper down. And when I finally reach the bottom of the ocean, I’ll be free. I’m only ever going to be a distant thought of people in the near future. And I think I’ll be okay with that. Everyone who has wronged me will never feel guilty and they don’t need to be until i give them a reason to. Every man and woman who has taken advantage of me or used me, won’t feel guilty until I give them a reason to. I’ve never been the first person anyone has ever turned to, and I’m fine with that. I don’t need to be the first. Or the second. I just want someone to care about me the way i’ve cared about so many people before. I would move and rearrange the stars if they wanted to see their favourite constellation, I just want someone to do that for me. Is that to much to ask? Am I being selfish? I just want someone to care about me the way i’ve cared. I just want to feel worth something. To anybody. Is that selfish?
I'm reading a webtoon rn and this mf look like Jacob holland
AUUGHHHHHHHH BUSTS
whar...
I have these outfit designs for this like story/comic thing I'm doing and these are the outfits I've done for Lea, because I LOVE lea <3
they're very Chinese and Vietnamese-themed....
Only one of them is Vietnamese-themed actually........ lets ignore that though
Okay so it's 5 am, I am listening to Katy Perry and I'm cold so I just realized I've never said anything to ANYONE about Arianna (My oc 4 the sea beast) minus one person. So here is that uh character info sheet. Her full name is Arianna Jamison Weber. She's related to another set of ocs. but they aren't important rn. She is a goddess!!!! I know I seem like I'm just giving her power but ever since my first oc Lulu, none of my other ocs have been Gods/Goddesses. So I made her a goddess of the ocean. (sry Lir lol)
But her being and goddess of the ocean AND a siren makes sense, doesn't it???? Kinda. That was my thought process when making her
She has more than one form!!! She actually only has four but it still counts. She has like... a massive crush on a mortal (Cough cough* Fen. *cough cough.) She is HALF AN INCH shorter than Sarah while in her human form She's only 23. And until I find out how old Fen is, that makes her younger than Fen. That's rlly it. But I don't wanna mention that she has like 6 kids.. so....
Hi, just a quick heads up, this post contains themes of SH, drvg abvse, SA, and lots of stuff like that so PLEASE do not read if you get triggered by that! I care about you, not me! Anyways lets get into this shit!
Starting off with my main OC, Arianna Wallen Litvin! (Yes that's her full name) (The Sea Beast OC) (I mean I guess her full name would be Arianna Rivera Wallen Litvin, but she hates her mom) -She has a tendency to protect. Like murder protect. She got it from being a hunter and watching so many of the people she befriended aboard the Inevitable die. -She tends to turn to substances and sex when she wants to feel anything more than grief and the nauseating feeling of sorrow that has followed her for years. -She hates her older siblings for being free. She absolutely wishes that it was them being forced to be perfect by their father, she also hates her father for the very same reason. -Part of her despises her wife for having a normal relationship with her father and mother -She has daddy issue. Okay? There I said it. -She finds her body literally repulsive cause it's riddled with scars and freckles. She literally hates a part of herself for being a hunter. -It's very rare that you see her actively harming herself. Normally it's just drugs. -She never really cries cause her mother would tell her that crying equalled weakness, and what child wants to be seen as weak by their mother? -this might also make her flat-out mentally ill but she's a high-functioning paranoid schizophrenic -Literally hates herself for letting herself get assaulted more then once (you can't tell her it's not her fault, she won't fucking listen we've tried someone please help her) Anyways, enough of Arianna, hate her, now it's time to introduce you to Lola Katelynn!!! My cuphead OC... Shhhh
-She used to be a raging alcoholic. Like it almost killed her typa shit. -She had horrible anxiety as a child, which caused her to develop paranoia at 15. -Lots of my OCs have mommy issues so, guess what??? She fucking hates her mom. -She tends to isolate herself from other people when she can't fucking take it anymore (me too girl) -There's honestly not a lot about this girl I can tell you, I don't really think of her that much but I can tell you that she punches holes in her walls, and her roommates HATE HER!!! There's literally close to nothing I can tell you about Lulu, Zhylas, and the other Zhylas. They're pretty mentally stable But FRANCESCA... Oh she's a different story. Her name is Francesca Wallen Aikawa, she's one of Arianna's daughters. (Yandere Simulator OC) -Her diet is terrible (as in she eats close to nothing) -Her Iron is horribly low and she drinks literally zero water, only Fruit Punch and Fruit Punch Rockstar -Her legs, below the knee cause she wears knee-high socks to school, are covered in bruises and scars, sometimes cuts. -She talks to herself, but doesn't everyone? -She tried to throw herself off the roof of her school, but SOMEONE (Aoi) pulled a Lucy Donato and fucking caught her through a window like fuck you bitch let me die!!!! -She's just like her mother with her need to protect people. -If you take something or someone away from her, she'll rip everything away from you, rather it be stealing someone you love, or murdering someone you love. -She's Irish (JOKE) -She has BPD and high-functioning depression. -She also fucking hate looking in the mirror
hope you enjoyed, bye!!! if you ask me I'll give you more info about the ocs mentioned in this post (●'◡'●)
G'day mates, I promise I'm mentally stable
which one of your oc's inspired your page? (it looks so good<3🩷🩷💖!!!)
My OC for the sea beast haha, her name is Arianna Wallen Litvin, I've posted her on my page before, she's a water goddess lol
you didnt ask for a picture but I have one so, here's her
•,¸,.·'Heyo. I'm Arianna. You can call me Ari though.'·.,¸,•
•,¸,.·' This blog is mostly art, sometimes vents. '·.,¸,•
•,¸,.·' Mainly the Sea beast... and my freakyness 👅'·.,¸,•
ᴬʳᵗ ᵇˡᵒᵍ ⁽ᵈᵉᵃᵈ⁾
╰─▸ ❝@arianna-litvinalt
(Just FYI, if you don't like my blog/what I post, DON'T TELL ME, IDC)
Hey restart fandom. Have my uhhh, Designs. Minus Chase, Shoshanna, Joel, Brittney Vanderveld (I think that's how you spell it), and Latisha Butz. I didn't have time to design them (I actually have designs for Chase and Shoshanna but I don't have a reason to show you guys them)
Enjoy my gacha memes 👅‼️
They/Her || I post what I want || "For the first time, he doesn't look at me like I'm crazy."
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