The Symbolism And Analogies And Freaking Foreshadowings This Had Me GASPING Left Right Up Down Front

the symbolism and analogies and freaking foreshadowings this had me GASPING left right up down front back and centre

Moon Starves Sun (FULL VERSION)

Dark!Gojo Satoru x reader

Word Count: 5.8k

Part one: Sun Eats Moon

Part two: Earth Kills Moon

(Warnings: forced relationship, implied nsfw content, implied noncon/dubcon, dark content, implied baby trapping)

When Satoru's close like this, he can hear your heartbeat.

It's been a while. Ten years. An entire decade. Everything about this is different, yet so familiar. He feels like he's finally reached the shores, feeling the warm sands underneath his feet. Like he's been given his favorite food after being starved for years. Everything melts. Everything except for you.

He'd like to stay like this forever, listening to your rabbit heartbeat, feeling your soft skin, but for your sake, he pulls himself off you. Lying on a wooden desk probably isn't that comfortable.

Your eyes are shut. Your breathing is shallow. You're so pretty like this under the moonlight. Your clothes are barely hanging onto your body. He can see every mark he's left on you. Part of him wants to make more, but he'll let you off the hook for now. He's nice like that.

"Still with me?"

Your eyes flutter open. You don't respond, but at least you're not crying anymore. He can work with that.

"C'mon, pretty girl," he says, voice soft, "let's piece you back together."

The belt left lines on your wrists. He'll kiss them better later. For now, Satoru collects your clothes and heels from the floor, placing them on the desk. He helps you reclasp your bra, runs his fingers on your arms when you finish buttoning your blouse. It's a quiet affair. Every so often, he'd catch your eyes. You don't let yourself linger for long. Satoru finds that a little cute.

You say nothing when he wraps an arm around your waist, guiding you out of his office. Maybe you're still dazed, still gathering yourself back up, because you don't struggle as much as he predicted. You try to leave his grip when the two of you reach the lobby. He's quick to stop you.

"Where, do you think you're goin'?" He grips your wrist when you take a step away.

You look at him, eyes shimmering like water.

You swallow. "My apartment. I—I need to go back—"

He clicks his tongue, bringing you back in.

"We can get your stuff later." He tells you with a grin. "let's just go home, tonight. I'm exhausted."

You open your mouth. Satoru waits. You say nothing, and he thinks you're starting to get it.

The moon is a dusky red tonight. Satoru thinks it's an ugly color.

☾

If Satoru could describe you in one word, it would be: predicatable.

Normal, boring, a speck in the crowd—none of these are bad things. Just like how much of the universe is nothing, you're an empty void, too. Not everyone can be like him. From the minute he was born, Satoru was destined for greatness—a prodigy, heir to a millionaire conglomerate, the Sun itself. His life isn't written on his forehead for everyone to read.

You are the exact opposite. Completely unassuming. He practically knows everything about you without even having to ask.

Like how Satoru can instantly tell you've never been over to a boy's room before.

You've probably never even been in a relationship before him, either. Even before he managed to corral you into his arms, you were always so annoying about the other things like school and friends. Though, you don't really have much of the latter anymore. His fault, Suguru never fails to remind him.

He watches as your eyes linger over his shelf: the numerous trophies and awards. You're still standing meekly in the corner, still garbed in your school uniform, clutching your backpack. He has to roll his eyes at how obviously you're trying not to look at him.

"What're you waitin' for?" He finally asks. You jump, eyes flitting over to find him before you find the floor. He resists the urge to roll his eyes again.

It's not like you two haven't done shit before. You sucked him off twice now, and he's finger fucked you against the bleachers. You should really stop being such a prude.

"C'mere, pretty girl."

You comply, dropping your bag, making your way to the bed. When you look at him from beneath your lashes, warily expectant, Satoru feels a thrill rushing through his body.

He's always been impatient. It's in his nature to take. He nips at your mouth, eager to taste your soul from your soft lips. Soft. Everything about you is so soft—Malleable beneath his fingers.

Satoru didn't explicitly say what his plan was, but you aren't stupid. He can tell you know what's about to happen when you stiffen in his hold, turn to stone within his grip. He would've allowed it if you hadn't gripped onto his shirt, pulling yourself away from his feasting.

"Satoru?" You whisper, still leaning away. "The door...?"

Annoyed, he glances over. His room is open. It shouldn't really matter.

"It's fine." Satoru tells you. "No one's here." No one's ever here.

You still look panicked, hands gripping his shirt. Satoru finds that adorably pathetic. How helpless you are. How that's all because of him.

He's sure to make a big show of it. Satoru gives a dramatic sigh, slumps his shoulders, but eventually pushes himself off the mattress to push at the door. He even clicks it shut. He's too nice, sometimes.

"Happy?" You nod, you don't look very relaxed but your shoulders have dropped a bit.

Satoru doesn't feel too guilty pushing you down, not when you're already in his bed. He isn't known for his patience. He tastes your skin, leaving marks when he can: teeth bites. He pushes you down down down down so he can sink his teeth into your flesh.

You're asleep and under the covers by the time he's done. The moon's out too. Satoru watches it, largely unimpressed. It's so tiny, a sliver of glowing white.

And then you shift, turning ever so slightly, enough to catch his attention. He should probably kick you out and send you home. That's what he usually does. When he gets into bed with you, draping his arms around your limp body, he convinces himself it's because he's tired and waking you up would be too much of an effort.

He lets himself enjoy your warmth; it's nothing like the cold glow of the moon.

☾

Sometimes, even Gojo Satoru wonders if he's dreaming.

Sometimes, life is too perfect for him to realize it is real. Everything falls perfectly in place, fitting together like those jigsaw puzzles his caretakers used to distract him with halfheartedly.

You're in his kitchen, chopping vegetables.

It had already been a few weeks, but he still wasn't used to this. You, being in his home, in his kitchen, in his bed. Satoru thinks he's masking it well, but his mind is still reeling, it's a difficult adjustment.

Not a bad one.

It's like he's been drowning for years and he can suddenly breathe when he sees your toothbrush next to his. It's like he's been stabbed and waking up to your sleeping face is the aloe. It's like he's been suffering through a blizzard, and you cooking in his kitchen, humming a song he doesn't know, is the warm sunny day.

Things have changed since he brought you home. His home doesn't feel incomplete anymore. As though the apartment itself has agreed that this is where you belong. There are more clothes in his closet, more shoes by the door. The space is ever so slightly less empty and it fills him with tangible relief. He can cook a meal, but it's still nice coming home to something warm already made.

It makes Satoru wonder what things could have been like, had it not been taken away from him.

You flinch when he wraps his hands around your waist, nestling into the space in your shoulder. You hadn't heard him come in, apparently. Regardless, you don't linger, fingers hesitating before resuming your task. He finds this part of you adorable. Ignoring the thing that makes your heart race, as though he'll just fade away into the shadows.

It's his ego that makes him slink into your warm skin, making sure you know he isn't going anywhere.

"Smells good," he says.

You nod, pushing away the bell peppers in favor of the onions. Unlike him, you acclimated extremely well. It'd taken nothing to lightly push you to add more and more stuff from your apartment to his. You quietly moved from one setting to another. He remembered this trait of yours from high school. Go with the flow.

Though, perhaps, it was less out of genuine apathy. Satoru doesn't have to say what will happen to you if you refuse him. He doesn't have to throw lectures about his family and the influence he has on you. He likes that you aren't stupidly brave. He likes that you're meeker, quieter. You pick your battles.

But he thinks he'd like to see you crack, just one more time.

"Hey," he says, "let's go out for dinner tomorrow night. There's this restaurant just out of town that has great shrimp cutlet."

He expects you to nod, like you always do whenever he decides to do something impulsive and meaningless. Instead, you bite your lip.

"I can't." You mutter after a minute of silence. "I have work. Mr. Higuruma just closed a deal and—and I think I'll be coming home later and later this week."

Home. It's enough to make his heart flutter. It's the first time you've called the apartment that. Your words almost make him forget about the second thing you said.

Higuruma. The lawyer guy with dead eyes. Satoru remembers him. He always looked at Satoru like he was a child, too stupid to do anything. He never liked how the guy looked at you. Besides, he was way too old for you, never mind that you were taken. You were always taken.

"Oh, right." Satoru gives an exaggerated sigh, fully leaning on you. "Work. What a shame."

You nod, clearly thinking the conversation is done with. Satoru wasn't so charitable.

"Y'know, you don't really have to work. Not anymore, pretty girl." His grip on your waist tightens ever so slightly as he pulls you towards his chest. Your hands freeze. The knife glints in your fingers.

"I make plenty of money. You should just stay home. That way, you don't have to work shitty hours."

You stiffen underneath his fingertips. He's disappointed when your skin turns frigid. When he peeks over your shoulder, intent to look at your face, there's a nervous smile twitching on your lips.

"I don't think that's a good idea..." you trail off hesitantly.

"Hm?" He tilts his head with faux confusion. "Why not?"

The knife moves up and down, as though you can't decide whether to place it back on the cutting board. Satoru realizes it's your way of fidgeting.

"It...it would just be unprofessional to leave when everything is so hectic." You finally decide on.

Satoru scoffs. "So? Who cares. I'm sure everything will work itself out. Just rely on me, pretty girl."

You don't like the answer, but you don't make a comment on it. Satoru just watches you rotate the knife in your hands. He wonders if you want to use it on him. Slice at his neck, leave him out to bleed on the pretty tile floor. Cut straight through his heart, ending it quickly.

Or would you like to carve out his eye and keep it as a souvenir? He thinks he'd happily let you. It sounds romantic.

You don't do anything. Instead, you pull back your shoulders as if you're physically ready for war.

"'Toru," you say gently, softly, and it works in his eyes, "I...can't let you support me like this. It's not right. It's not like we're married or anything." You laugh, like it's a joke. Satoru doesn't cave.

"I mean, not yet." Satoru rocks you back and forth in his hold. "But gimme' some time to shop for a ring, okay? It needs to be perfect for my perfect girl."

You follow his movements. He can see your mouth twitch out of the corner of his eye. Your eyes get glassy.

He knows he's terrible, but he really wants you to crack.

"You're right, Satoru." You say, "I'll put in my two weeks tomorrow." He grins in delight.

"That's a great idea, baby." Satoru kisses you on the cheek.

Right, you pick your battles.

☾

Satoru tells you he loves you, and you're gone, not even three days later.

He breaks and shatters into pieces he'll never be able to put back. Each day without you is torture. He feels like a corpse, just going through the motions. His clothes feel looser. His skin doesn't feel like his own anymore. Every time he looks in the mirror, he sees someone he barely even recognizes.

It's like you left with his heart.

No, you ran away with his soul.

One day, you were Satoru's, safely tucked underneath his arm...the next, you just weren't.

His parents don't acknowledge it beyond casual disgust. Every time Suguru talks to him, Satoru can barely comprehend it. Days pass by. Everything reminds him of you. His bed feels emptier; he hates it when he reaches out to the space you used to take up and finds it cold. Your locker remains untouched. Nothing is ever the same.

Satoru tries looking for you, but you're untraceable. No social media, no friends left to tell where you went, not even your fucking parents know where you are.

You left him.

You left him to rot.

Denial comes first. It can't be. You wouldn't. You wouldn't fucking dare. Anger seeps in the next. For weeks, Satoru can only imagine what he'll do when he finds you. He'll break your legs this time. He'll squeeze your neck so hard that your head pops. He'll kill you over and over again until your corpse is begging to be forgiven. And he won't ever stop, because you're Satoru's.

That doesn't stay for long. He feels himself get weaker day by day. Food tastes like dirt on his tongue. Any of his earlier vices are gone.

He misses you.

Why wouldn't he? You were his everything.

Like all things, it passes. You aren't there to fuel the flames, so the fire wanes in his chest. The ache in his heart gets smaller and smaller. Things keep him busy. College. Then, his new position in the office.

Ten years pass. He’s forgotten what you look like. But he remembers parts. Every so often, he sees a flicker of you within someone else. Your eyes are on another woman’s face. Your lips on a girl's smile. It irritates him to no end. It’s even worse when he starts seeking them out, keeping those parts of them for just the night.

Sometimes, if he closes his eyes, he can still hear your voice—what he thinks is your voice—soft, needy Toru Toru Toru.

“Gojo, sir?”

He blinks. Ijichi stands in front of him. Satoru looks down at the meticulously crafted pages.

“Mr. Higuruma needed you to sign this,” Ijichi lifts a paper filled with bureaucratic bullshit he pays other people to understand.

Why did Suguru take off now?

“Sure sure,” Satoru says, “I’ll get it done.”

Ijichi shifts nervously. “Well, it’d be best to finish it right now, Sir. His paralegal is just about to leave the building.”

Oh, right. The lawyer’s assistant. Gojo could never get a good look at that person, but the assistant resembled a shaking deer to him at most times. He’s not even sure if they’ve ever talked to each other, but he always found the other a bit odd. Big eyes. A shaky expression.

It was a little annoying to look at.

☾

Some executive was throwing an office gala, and since he is Gojo Satoru, he needed to come along.

And since you are Satoru's, you're dragged along too.

Honestly, the only upside to this is you and that new dress he bought you. A velvet turquoise dress that he can't take his eyes off of. The gold jewelry draped across your neck makes you even more delectable. But his favorite part of the outfit is the shimmering diamond ring.

The ceremony hadn't been anything extravagant. He'd just booked out one of his favorite restaurants, ordering lobster and sweet wine. He remembered hearing his heartbeat when he bent down on one knee, opening the elegant ringbox, like an oyster revealing its pearl. Looking back, he didn't know why he was so nervous: it's not like you'd say no.

"What do you think of it?" He asked when you were back in his bed, bare from everything except that glistening ring.

"It's pretty." You spoke, perfectly nestled in his chest.

He feels in his heart when he hugs you, a small kiss in your hair. You say something, but he can't hear it; he is too preoccupied with feeling you in his arms. It's still so new, even after all these weeks. It's the anxiety, knowing at any second you could leave and he'd be nothing. He won't allow that, he can't.

"I thought about something else, y'know?" He speaks quietly in your hair. "Ropes, chains, maybe. I could keep you here, forever. But—but then I realized how sad you'd get. I couldn't go through with it."

You give no reaction. When he tilts your chin up to get a better look at you, your eyes are glassy.

"You get that, right?"

You nod. He's really too nice, sometimes.

He spends the entire evening with you, tucked away in a corner, away from prying eyes. Just because he has to be there doesn't mean he has to be sociable. Every time someone walks up to him and you, a drink in one hand, he resists the urge to bite their head off, feigning politeness. He complains about their lack of decorum to you multiple times throughout the night, his head resting on your shoulder. You pliantly sit there, listening and nodding.

About ten minutes after the last board member left, someone else walks up. By then, Satoru's patience has mostly declined. He peers over with disdain before he can really process who he's seeing.

"Suguru!" He waves over.

You stiffen, and Satoru remembers you haven't seen him in ten years.

Suguru walks over with an easy smile on his face. He's nicely tanned, and Satoru is reminded of the pictures he sent over of the Maldives. Maybe that's where the honeymoon should be.

"Had fun slacking?" Satoru asks with a grin; Suguru shrugs.

When his eyes meet yours, he feigns delighted surprise. Suguru speaks your name with practiced shock. It's imperfect, only Satoru can see the amusement dripping from his fangs.

"Long time, no see!" Effortlessly, Suguru corrals you into a hug. You follow, giving into the cold touch of affection before pulling away back to him.

"Hello, Geto." You say when you're rightfully by his side again. "It's nice to see you again."

Suguru laughs, light and airy. "You as well!" He looks at your hands, tilts his head. "Oh? Congratulations, you two! When's the date?"

"Eh, we'll figure that out later." Satoru gives a quick kiss on your cheek. "Everything happened so fast, y'know? Us reuniting and everything: It feels like fate." Suguru's eyes flash. "Let's not rush this. We'll take our time."

Suguru nods along thoughtfully. He's looking right at you, and you stare right back. Not used to feeling left out, Satoru is quick to intervene.

The conversation is light, two long-time friends reuniting after a long spell. You stay quiet like decor, settling into Satoru's side. Suguru doesn't acknowledge you after that.

"We gotta' go. It's getting late." He eventually says, tugging you along.

Suguru gives a pleasant smile. "Of course, of course. We should catch up sometime." He directs this at you. You give a strained smile before Satoru leads you off.

"Suguru." The man turns. Satoru grins.

"I loved my gift. Thanks, man."

Suguru's smile is catlike.

"You kids have fun." He calls out right when Satoru's dragging you away all over again.

You're silent. Not in the way you usually are, pliant and cute. You're thinking. He gives you a nudge.

"What's goin' on in that pretty head of yours?"

You shake your head. "Nothing." And then you say, "He's changed."

From your view, Satoru supposed that's true, but really—

"Nah." Gojo shakes his head. "He's just dropped his act."

Satoru's hand was wrapped around your waist when you two ran into him. You hadn't noticed him yet, eyes fixed on the floor. The lawyer hadn't changed since the last time Satoru saw him. That dead expression, those creepy eyes. Higuruma's eyes flit over your figure, before he finds Satoru's.

He stares. Satoru stares right back. Something gives, and the lawyer calls out your name.

"How are you?" His tone is cool, and this is another reason why Satoru can't stand him. The guy has no tells. He's just a talking robot.

Unlike you, fidgeting by his side, practically vibrating with nerves.

"I'm fine, sir." Your smile gets more painful to look at by the second.

Your voice earns you a tired smile, a mild pinch of humor. Higuruma shakes his head, waving you off.

"No need for formalities. We aren't at work." His smile drops just a bit, as he watches you for a bit more, eyes flickering to your hand. "I was...surprised when I saw the announcement. I didn't know you and Mr. Gojo were involved."

Satoru grins, making himself known like a shark in the water. His grip on you tightens.

"Oh, you didn't tell your boss 'bout us, baby?" He looks down at you with cruel mirth, pinching your cheek. You wilt. "We go way back—highschool sweethearts. Lost contact for a couple years. It's actually thanks to you we were able to find each other again. We'll send you the invites." He presses a kiss to your hairline.

Higuruma hums at that. Satoru expected jealousy in his eyes; he's even more upset when he finds none.

"I'll be sure to save the date."

Then he shuts Satoru down completely.

"I heard about your resignation. It's sad to see you go," Higuruma says.

You nod, but you don't look at him. "Satoru and I talked about it, and we decided it's best if I focused on other things."

"Very, very busy, this one nowadays." Satoru interrupts. "Between wedding plannin' and all that."

"Is that so?" Higuruma says dismissively, "in any case, you already knew this, but I've begun preparations to start a new firm." He reaches into his wallet, pulling out a card. "I always thought you were good at what you do. If you ever want to get back into the industry, call me."

You take the laminate slip with a quiet thank you. Satoru feels blue turn into red.

When Higuruma slips into the party, Satoru tightens his grip on you a little harsher than necessary. He's dragging you through the halls. Behind him, he can hear you stumbling over your heels, begging him to slow down. He knows he should care, but he doesn't. That damn lawyer. Those dead eyes. Mocking him.

"Did you fuck him?" He asks when his anger has reached a high enough peak that he presses you against the wall.

Your eyes are wild, flitting back and forth. He'd your expression a little cute if he wasn't feeling like a furnace, at the moment.

"No. I—we never." You say. "Mr. Higuruma was my boss. And—and he's married—"

"Really? 'cause you're precious 'Mr. Higuruma' was eyeing you up and down like he's already seen what's underneath."

"'Toru." You plead. "Let's—let's just talk about this at home. Please? Let's just go home." Home. You said that word again. If he were a better man, he'd melt, but he's not.

"Shut up." He spits out. "Hike up your dress."

You stare at him. Then, you try to smile, like he's making a shitty joke. It wavers on your lips.

"It's...we're still in public." You whisper and it's so cute you think he'd actually care about that. "We—we can't...we shouldn't—"

"Baby." His voice drops, as he licks at your neck. "Pull up your dress, get rid of those panties. Otherwise, I'm just gonna take it off myself."

He doesn't need to explain anything further. You already get what he's saying. Right now, Satoru doesn't care if you leave this building with your clothes intact.

He thinks the worst part is that he knows he's being unreasonable. He's backing you into a corner where you'll have no choice but to surrender, and he knows that, but he keeps thinking about those man's eyes and how he looked at you and it was just all so much.

He'll apologize to you later, with flowers and shiny gold earrings. He'd give you the world; just be good for him now.

He just needs his fix. So just be good for him now.

☾

When Satoru discovers it's been you all along, he feels like an idiot.

In a pathetic way of defending himself, he convinces himself there's no way he could have recognized you. You're so different compared to your high-school self. 18-years old, fresh-eyed, naive. The you now is all grown up: a mature voice, a new hairstyle, clothes he'd never even think you'd wear.

It also didn't help that he couldn't even see your face since you turned away every time he looked at you.

Embarrassing. He's just glad Suguru wasn't here to call his blunder.

He thought about it a lot. He spent an hour in his office, pacing around, doing nothing but thinking and thinking and thinking. Part of him wants to corner you already. He can already feel your rabbit heartbeat on his fingertips, the look you always had in your eyes when he was right in front of you. Part of him wants to ruin your life the same way you ruined his. He wants to tear you apart, piece by piece. Leave you in tattered pieces.

But he can't do that. Satoru still loves you.

You left him a hollow shell. Broken. Tainted. There are pieces of him he still can't find. He should hurt you. He's hurt other people for doing less. But they weren't you. Even after all those years, he's never quite stopped loving you.

But he wants to sate his bloodlust, just a tiny bit.

His perfect opportunity comes where he, the lawyer, and you are all sitting in one of the waiting rooms. The lawyers explaining something, possibly about the ongoing case. Satoru doesn't really care. Besides, this is what Ijichi's here for.

He waits until everyone is quiet. You're unassuming. By then, your shoulders have lowered, like you think you've gotten away with it

"Hey," he says, "do we know each other?"

The other two don't bother, but you stop completely. The pen in your grip shakes. Satoru resists the urge to laugh.

You timidly glance up like you're still delusional enough to think there's a fifth person he's talking to. Satoru has always been told his eyes are like two suns: bright and intense. He lowers his glasses. You wilt under the solar flares.

"Hm?" He prods, enjoying the way you shrivel. "Have we?"

You swallow, glassy eyes flicking from side to side. Finally, you clear your throat.

"No." You mutter, voice barely a whisper. "I don't think we have."

"Are you sure?" To intensify the magnifying glass, he leans closer, like he's examining you. "'cause you look really familiar."

To his delight, you chew on your bottom lip. He can imagine biting it until it's bloody and raw. He stops just when you're about to shatter completely. Breaking you too soon would take the fun out of it.

"Oh, wait. I don't think that was you." He relents, pulling back and he can see the relief ooze over your face. "I think I got you mixed up with someone who interviewed here a couple months ago. My bad. Maybe you have one of those faces."

You nod, eager to take the out.

"Yes," you quickly say, "one of those faces."

How adorable. You haven't changed since high school.

He's usually not this obvious, but Suguru isn't here to berate him about it and it's not like anyone else will get on his ass. The women he brings in are his usuals: tall models with full lips and perfect bodies. Satoru parades them around like expensive jewelry. He wants to see you seethe in envy, stew in it. He wants you to see what you abandoned.

But you don't do any of that. You just sit there, like the dutiful little workbee you are, right by your boss's side.

And then, you give one of them your jacket. Satoru can't stand it wrapped around her waist like she fucking owns it—own you. She wears it so flagrantly, like any token from you shouldn't be worshipped and coveted. He hates it. He hates it.

"I've never done this in an office before." She squeals when she shuts the door behind her. "So, how do you—"

"Get out."

The girl pauses. What was her name again? Satou was too pissed to give a single shit.

"Um, what?"

"What, you deaf or something?" He waves her off as if he weren't seething. "Get out."

"Oh," she says, blinks, and then she takes a step back.

"Wait." Satoru stops her.

"Take that off." He points to your jacket. She does it with zero complaints. When he tells her to drop it on the chair, she follows that too. Reluctant expectation. Kind of like you. Maybe that's why he was initially invested in her.

He only takes the fabric after she's gone. It's soft underneath his fingertips. Nothing designer, but good quality. When you're finally underneath him again, he'll buy you better clothes, all the jackets you want.

He needs you. He can't wait anymore.

He needs you, whether you want him or not.

☾

Satoru wakes up to something crashing.

It's faint, obviously coming from the bathroom. Not the best way to be woken up. He remembers the first few nights he brought you home. He'd hear you crying in your sleep, choking on tiny sobs. It was the sweetest little thing, like a whimpering puppy.

These noises are a little more concerning.

He yawns, sliding out of bed. You didn't bother locking the door. You didn't even close it all the way, either. A sliver of light comes from the crack before he pushes it open.

"Baby?" He calls. You don't answer.

You had knocked over a caddy. Toothbrushes, hairclips, soap dispensers, perfume bottles were scattered all over the floor. You're curled up in the corner of the bathroom, huddled right next to the tub. You seem physically okay, no blood, no bruising, but he can't see your face. And you're shivering.

Satoru's about to call out to you, when he steps on something. He looks down at the tiles.

A positive pregnancy test.

"I'm not keeping it." Your voice is hoarse, like you've been crying for hours. "I'm not keeping it."

"Pretty girl." He coos, trying his best to keep the glee out of his voice and failing. "Let's not worry 'bout that, right now. C'mon, let's get you off the floor." He reaches for your hand. You smack it away. It stung.

When you look at him, eyes bloodshot and brimming with angry tears, Satoru's heart skips a beat. He feels like he just trapped a wild animal, making it pace in a corner. Any wrong move could result in his hand getting bit off. It's scary.

He's finally cracked you.

"Fuck you." Your voice shakes and wobbles, but it's loud and you're clear. "Fuck you. You're a sick, twisted man-child. You ruined everything. You ruined my entire life and—and now you—"

You're cut off by his giggling. It sounds psychotic even to his ears. He's beyond caring. You flinch when lifts your face up, forcing you to look into his eyes. He's smiling so hard it hurts.

"Yeah, I did that. I ruined you. I ruined your entire fucking life. For me." He stresses, squeezing your face so hard you try to pull away. "But I had to. You—you wouldn't be here if I didn't." He sighs, pressing your body to his. "I need you."

You're both huddled on the bathroom floor, captive and lover. He's clutching you to his chest, smiling, nestling his face in your hair. You don't say anything for a while.

"I'm not keeping it." You whisper. "I'm not. I wouldn't stand it if it ended up like you."

It's spiteful. You're still in that phase where you think your venom can hurt him, as though he'd see your blows as anything but blessings. Satoru thinks to his own childhood. Where he was given everything, lathered in gold and silver. Yet, the house was always cold. But you were always so warm.

"That won't happen." He tells you. "'cause you're here."

Your anger has dwindled to smoke. Maybe you've finally realized how crazy he was for you.

"Please let me go." It's not a beg. It's not even a request.

"I can't," he honestly says.

"You won't." You correct him.

He smiles in your hair.

"No baby," he says, "I can't."

If you ran away again, if you escaped his claws, he'd probably die. Drop dead, rot on the floor. He needs you. Even more than he needs food, water, and oxygen. You won't understand that. You've never been in love before.

You don't fight him. If anything, you sink into his hold. He's there to catch you, heart soaring. You lean into his chest

"I hate you." You whisper. His heart beats a little faster. It's probably the first time you've ever been so honest with him.

God, he loves you.

"I hope our baby has your eyes," he says.

"I hope our baby looks exactly like you."

You say nothing, but when he leans down to kiss you, you finally kiss back. You're cracked, and your essence is ready to be molded in his image, just like he's always wanted you to be.

If Satoru is the Sun, then you must certainly be his universe, the plane in which he rests, because there would be no existence for him if not for you.

Tags

jujutsu kaisen gojo satoru smut

Genshin Impact Men + Awkward Boners

Pairing: Kaeya, Diluc, Itto, Thoma, Xiao, Gorou, Zhongli x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, embarrassment, teasing, awkward boners, masturbation mention

A/N: This is just something I find really funny to think about.

Kaeya would try to play it off as intentional. How could he not get horny when you're laying your head in his lap, your lips so close to where he needs them most right now. So what if the two of you were just going over reports? He couldn't help but stare at your lips, imagining them closing in on his cock. Fuck, fuck the reports, he wants you. Now.

Oh Diluc would be as read as his hair. Getting horny behind the counter as he watches you cleaning up tables, when some of the patrons are still there. If he were to move away from it he knows that his bulge would be visible. You hear him groan and see him looking a little uncomfortable. When you walk around to him and see the predicament he's in you can barely stop your chuckle as his face gets even redder. You lean in close to his ear, whispering to help him take care of it as soon as the last customer is out.

Itto would only be slightly embarrassed. He got hot and horny just from sparring with you. That might not be a problem right now but if the two of you were in a middle of a fight and he got a boner it would be really difficult for him to fight. Luckily if he learned anything in his life it was that practice makes perfect. So if he can make this go away, with perhaps a little help from you, then you can spar again and he can try not to get a raging hard on. But if he does, well it's nice knowing that your lips, hands, tits and cunt are always his to help himself to.

Thoma would be feeling guilty about it more than anything. He was supposed to be the one helping everyone with their problems and here he was getting horny just because you sat on his lap and whispered into his ear. Fuck, he can't help but buck his hips into yours, and saying sorry right after, hiding his face in your shoulder. You don't really care, in fact you tell him that if anything it's flattering that you can make him feel this way. If there's anything, anything you can do to help, you'd be happy to. After all he's the one always helping others, its only fair that you help him avoid any more embarrassment.

Xiao finds it odd that it happened when the two of you were just cuddling. He hasn't slept in the same bed with many people any it's even more rare that this kind of thing happens to him. He wants to scurry away before you wake up and take notice but his wiggling only makes you press yourself harder against his bulge. He can't help but groan, the sound waking you up and realizing his not so little problem. It's even more rare for him to blush in front of someone, so this is a real treat for you indeed. As you roll your hips again to tease him he has to put his hands on hips to stop you before he creams into his pants. But you want him to, you tell him to let go, and enjoy. And indeed he does.

Gorou was so fucking embarrassed about getting a hard on in the middle of a meeting with the rest of the generals. He quickly excuses himself and leaves to his bedroom, that he shares with you. When the meeting ends you enter the bedroom and find him pumping his cock while sniffing your pillow. His face goes crimson when he sees you in the room. As you approach he uses the pillow to hide his hard on, but the pressure only makes him grind his hips into the pillow. He apologizes for you seeing him like this. The last thing he expected though was for you to move the pillow and wrap your mouth around his cock instead, inviting him to finish what he started. Your mouth is much better then a pillow after all.

Zhongli can't believe that he let himself lose control over himself like this. You were just sitting in his lap, helping him go over his latest contracts when you felt his hardening dick poking against your ass. You back up into him further, not sure if you're dreaming or not, but the growl that comes into your ear sends such a bolt of pleasure through your body that you can feel the wetness already gathering between your thighs, better than any dream. Zhongli takes a deep breath and bucks his hips into yours, his hands now firm on your hips to keep you still as he continues to roll his hips into yours. Never in his life did he think he would be desperately humping his lover in his own office, but he can't help his instincts. You're beautiful, you smell good, and horny, and absolutely ravishing. And he will have you, Right here, right now.

Tags

genshin smut

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ara-ara-bitch

1 year ago

@justabitthirsty

girlie that's not a random headache u are dehydrated malnourished over caffeinated over stressed and sleep deprived

Tags

ohp🫢 you got me there✋🤚 but that's not a crime🙄🤚

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ara-ara-bitch

2 years ago

🫢🫣😮‍💨🛐🛐🛐

taking his knot | 𝕥𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕟𝕒𝕣𝕚

a.n: i want to eat him. cw. knotting

ʕ •̀ ω •́ ʔ

imagine the way he would switch between whimpering and growling. his hands slipping from your waist because he’s fucking you in such a frenzy that a sheen of sweat covers your body, the smell of your arousal driving him insane.

he flips you over flat on your stomach and fucks into you like that. he lets gravity do the work as he drops his hips against your ass, pounding into you. but when you cry for more, for him to fuck you harder and deeper, he grips the headboard and uses it to drive himself into you. the wood bangs against the wall as he splits you open, and he’s sure everyone person and creature in gandharva ville can hear your cries of pleasure.

he’s borderline delirious now. his body weight is comforting on top of you as he licks from your shoulder up to your ear, nibbling on your skin as he whispers filthy promises of how your gonna take his knot, of how he’s gonna empty himself into your tight hole and fill you up. when he feels himself getting close, he quickly pulls out and turns you over; something about how the lewd look on your face as he stretches you out makes him come even harder. he pushes your knees to your chest as he slips inside you, a harsh growl bubbling from his chest as he sets a harsh pace, hard and so deep that each thrust takes your breath away. you know he’s close when you feel yourself begin to stretch around him even more.

you press a hand to his lower stomach in an attempt to get him to slow down but he grabs it, holding it above your head as he leans in closer, “you’re gonna take this cock for me?” he whispers before capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. it’s sloppy and messy as your teeth gnash together, his tongue swirling around yours.

he leans back again and holds your thighs down, your knees pressed to your ears now as he has you spread wide open. he pushes himself inside you one more time, slipping in with a wet pop. his grip is tight against your legs as his cock swells some more before coating your insides with thick ropes of creamy cum. he lets out the most salacious moans as he fills you, showering you with praises of “that’s it’s baby” and “fuck you feel so warm” and “god you’re so good for taking all of my cum. for taking all of me.”

the sensation of fullness coupled with how wanton and filthy tighnari is being is what finally drives you over your edge. with a wail of his name so loud he’s sure the sages in sumeru city could hear, you tighten around his thick cock, and the vice grip you have on him causes him to choke. he collapses to your chest with a whine as his body shoots out even more cum. and after giving you all that he has, he lays there, his face pressed against your chest as he waits for both of you to catch your breaths. his tail curls around your waist as he slowly turns you guys over, his cock still inside you. you rest on top of him for a moment, your eyes sliding shut when all of sudden you feel him jerk underneath you. you look down at him to see his pretty eyes glowing, his canines growing a bit sharper as he asks you with a predatory grin,

“ready for round two??”

Tags

genshin x reader genshin smut tighnari x reader tighnari smut

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ara-ara-bitch

2 years ago

Tags

writing tips

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ara-ara-bitch

2 years ago

its.. GIVING EVERYTHING I NEED RN ISTG HIRA

I wanna ruin our friendship, we should be lovers instead—

synopsis !! a burst of courage is all you need to ruin your friendship

characters !! diluc, kaeya, zhongli, xiao

cw !! sfw mature content, undefined relationships, somewhat friends with benefits? complicated relationship status, consented actions

D I L U C

Imagine clambering onto Diluc's lap at a dark corner of Angel's Share, noise playing in the background and drunkards swaying to the songs of bards. You've been trading teases and hints all night, more from you than from the redhead, hoping he'd get the hint that you want a little more than what his friendship has to give. His eyes widen a little, looking at yours with uncertainty as his one hand steadies your waist while the other hesitantly pushes you back.

"You're drunk," he mutters as if to warn you but you shake your head no, taking a sip from the wine glass you balanced between your fingers.

"I'm not." You lean closer, wondering if there's even any effort in the hand that's pushing you back.

"That's what all the drunks say."

A smile graces your lips as you slip the wine glass between your faces, tilting it to his lips and – despite his aversion for alcohol – he drinks from your cup, eyes never leaving yours. Droplets of dark red drips from his lips to his chin from your hold of the glass.

"How's the wine, master Diluc?"

"It's. . . grape juice."

"Exactly." You place the wine glass on the table next to you, feeling the way his arms snake around your waist to pull you closer. Who said you needed liquid courage to help you get a love life anyway?

K A E Y A

"So-" He pulls away but you're relentless: lips following his for another kiss. Kaeya indulges you –only for a second– before trying to escape the onslaught of a make out session that's been ongoing for the past 10 minutes or so.

"What does–"

Kiss.

"This make–"

Kiss.

"Us?"

Kiss. This one lasts a little longer. You try to register his words in your dazed mind. What does this make you two? You've been in love with him for so long now, dropping relentless hints to the point that you've dropped the biggest "hint" of all and pulled him into the Favonius library for a quick snog.

You pull away but your eyes settle on his lips, a blush filtering your face. Could you really handle facing his pretty little lavender eye right now? "I don't know, captain. What do you think this makes us?"

He shakily inhales, fingers reaching up to hold your chin, bringing your lips closer to his, "I'm not sure. We might need. . . a few more minutes of this to figure it out."

Z H O N G L I

"Friends don't do things like this," You breathe out against his ear as his lips pepper kisses to the side of your neck. You really didn't need to remind him. He knows all the formalities there is to a friendship, therefore you should know how he knows that this isn't something you do to a friend.

Yet, can you blame him for his actions of worship when you've been suggesting wanting more of him? How could he deny your "I wouldn't mind kissing someone like mister Zhongli" or "The funeral consultant is my ideal type" kind of comments? He's bound to pull his dear friend in by the waist one of these nights.

"Would you like to stop?" He pauses, lips a fraction away from the underside of your ear. He peeks at you from the corner of his eye and you shake your head no.

"Archons, no. Keep going." It's breathy and shaky, and if you paid a little more attention, you'd feel the smirk on his lips and he presses against your skin.

X I A O

"Hypothetically, if a friend were to kiss you, would you kiss them back?"

He gives you a look mixed between disgust and confusion. What kind of question is that? Sure, he's not familiar with human customs but kissing is done between lovers and not friends, right? His mind filters through the people he somehow considers a "friend". . . There's Ganyu, Traveler, Chongyun, Yelan, Shinobu, Yanfei, Itto–

"No." He answers and you pout.

"Did you consider Itto when I said a friend?"

". . ."

You giggle at his silence, eyes glancing at his as he stares away.

Biting your lip, you ask quietly, "Hypothetically, did you consider me?" You say, "What if I kissed you?"

He hums, obscuring his face from your view but you see his shoulders ease down. "Then. . . kiss back, I suppose."

masterlist 2

note !! not @/ me adding xiao to my short drabbles after finishing his quest last night

taglist !! @absolut-wildflower @boundedbyfate @sadlonelybagel @eissaaaa @ladycoleigh @nejibot @milkypompon @bloodreaper08 @irethepotato @x-zho @roriver @mich-cola @mxsomn @ackrylik @nicebonescomrade @starforecasts

Tags

genshin x reader zhongli diluc ragnvindr kaeya alberich genshin xiao

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ara-ara-bitch

2 years ago

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆

# day 2. spectrophilia

dilf!fushiguro toji x ghost f!reader

genre. gothic romance, smut

s. father and son move into an antique mansion, ready to start a new life — but the house’s past seems to be waiting for them

cw. toji is a good dad (megumi is five), oral, praise, pet names, m. solo, size kink, creampie, mating press, fingering, doggy, full nelson, squirting | wc. 6500

tw. characters death, mention of deaths and suicides

kinktober m.list | interactions are appreciated

once it wasn’t in this gloomy condition. it had a clear and wide facade, long windows that were always open, and freshly laundered curtains. the lawn it overlooked was daily tended, the hedges were pruned, and the landlady’s favorite flowers were planted according to the seasons. the woods at the back hid a small lake, and not far away a greenhouse.

now, rose mansion, no longer looked like a kind house. it had taken on the semblance of a place of despair, not meant to be lived in, not fit for people, hope or love. it had become an uppity, alive, evil house.

they arrived toward the end of a mid-june afternoon. they turned into the driveway, and the crunch of the car’s wheels startled the crows clustered in the treetops, which took off cawing around the house.

“what do you think, buddy?” the young man closed the car door behind him before helping a little copy of himself out of the passenger side. “it’s old,” the boy wrinkles his nose, making the man beside him smile.

it wasn’t the first time you’d seen him. a few months earlier he had walked around the halls and rooms of rose mansion with a woman who showed him around the house, step by step, room by room and secret by secret, with amusing talk. he was wearing a dark coat, and his hair was falling over his forehead in a messy way. he looked like he was going through a rough period.

“it’s not old,” toji laughed, taking his child’s hand, “it’s vintage.” he didn’t seem to believe his own words much either. “hey, i know, it’s an ugly, old … old house,” he chuckles opening the front door, “but it’s a new beginning, for us.”

Keep reading

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ara-ara-bitch

9 months ago

so up my alley

if wei wuxian had ignored lan wangji a little, that would be the utmost fix-up. because, listen to me: if wei wuxian had decided to play hard to get after so many times receiving the cold shoulder from hanguang-jun, the man would be so dejected. imagine he decides ‘oh, well, guess i’ll just stop pestering him and do my stuff instead’. lan wangji would be so confused, he’d start begging inside during public appearances for wei wuxian to pay attention on him once more.

he’d struggle to get first place in every competition to be noticed by the yumeng’s head disciple. he’d stare at him so intensely all the time that at some point every cultivator will already understand or he wants wei wuxian naked or wants him tied somewhere, whimpering. or both, for the matter, but who cares at that point??! the cultivators just want some peace!!

lan wangji would buy him stuff. write him stuff. indulge his mischiefs. ask his laughing brother for advice. paint a ‘wei ying… notice me,” in his white clothes, making lan qiren go mad (alright, he wouldn’t do it, but you get what i mean).

it’s just that, canonically, i believe he absolutely loves wei wuxian’s undivided attention (his teenage self wouldn’t ever admit though). but if wei wuxian had ignored him a bit, lan wangji would have learned long ago how much he doesn’t want wei wuxian away, causing him to protect him harder.

but that’s just another theory that’ll never get proved because wei wuxian is a simp. he’s a hanguang-jun worshipper. the gayest gay to have ever gayed. his sleeves are so cut that the fabric’s now gone and he’ll walk around naked. he couldn’t have not bothered lan wangji — if you ask him, he’ll say he was born for that.

Tags

wangxian

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ara-ara-bitch

1 year ago

GOOD SHIT GOOD👏QUALITY👏ART👏

The Radio Demon fucks a Human Sacrifice (part 3)

I deadass wrote part one as a one shot. Is this what peer pressure is? I love it.

It would have been easy to forget you, your soul was his anyways so the real fun had already finished. But that pesky video hit most streamed in 24 hours, he couldn’t even walk to the butcher without hearing you scream his name from errant phones. Surely there was a way, even from hell, to finish what he started and get you out of his system.

(Part two)

tags/warnings/promises: Alastor x reader, smut, soft Alastor, unprotected sex (duh?), creampie, edging a little, feelings, Valentino exists, Vox also exists, literally wrote this split screen with part 2 on the right side so I could line it up right like he does hehe, Alastor has a bad time

tag requested: @astraechos , @thekanrojimitsuri2 , @hoeforalbedo , @crazylazybabyk , @oddball08 , @lovingyeet , @just-trash-yeah-thats-it , @random-3455 , @alicehasdrowned , @des-deswain5621 , @coffee-colored-hopeless-romantic , @doctorswife221b

When Val released, ‘The Radio Demon fucks a Human Sacrifice’, it immediately went viral. The website crashed, downloads surpassed his wildest, horniest dreams.

It’s scary but also hot? ☆☆☆☆☆

Eat me Mr. Radio Demon!

I’ve never wanted to be a pussy so much in my life.

The reviews were all favorable, the comments rolling in, it was perfect.

Until Vox said it wasn’t. He had seen the video, but figured no one would care about seeing Alastor fuck anything. It wasn’t the success that got under his skin, it was the wave of positive attention it brought Alastor. Suddenly everyone was tuning in to his broadcasts, little miss princess’s hotel was busier than ever.

And it was ubiquitous. Every screen seemed to feature Alastor’s breakout role.

“I said pull it, Val!” Vox slammed his hands on Valentino’s coffee table.

“Vox, baby, you’re being really sensitive about this. I’m literally fucking piles of money right now. Actual piles of money, like, person sized piles.” Val took a drag of his cigarette, “Its good for business.”

“Would you rather fuck money, or me?” Vox’s screen glitched.

Val leaned his elbows on his knees, “That’s a really difficult question for me and I think you know that.”

“Augh! Val! Think of the big picture! That obsolete dickhead gaining attention means gaining power. And that’s bad for business.”

Val’s eyes fluttered, “What if we like, say it wasn’t him?”

Flashes of Alastor’s face fazed in and out of focus across Vox’s screen, your body flipping over, a mess of tentacles writhing.

Val took off his glasses, “Oh yeah, that’s pretty obviously him.”

“What is?” Vox’s face splintered back to the screen.

“Do you—- do you not know you’ve been like,” Val used his cigarette to gesture at Vox’s face, “just straight up playing his porno?”

Vox’s hands flew to his screen, “No! Fucking shit! What the fuck!!” He picked up a vase and threw it across the room, “Wipe it clean off the server! Delete it! Ban it’s fucking streaming! End of discussion!”

Val shrugged, he owned every bootleg distributor in the pride ring. He’d pull it and up the price threefold for illegal downloads. “Whatever you want, amorcito.”

Alastor was quite happy the video went ‘underground’ of sorts. The first month after you left, he was plagued by the sound of your voice. Everywhere he went it seemed you were screaming his name, every phone and television a conduit for you.

What really bothered him though, was the reaction others had to him. Where once sinners leapt from his path and set theirselves on fire to avoid him, now people winked and waved. It made his skin crawl. When alive, at the peak of his radio show fame, it wasn’t uncommon to have fans approach him in jazz clubs. But the decorum of 1930's jazz fans was a far cry from the brazen displays of desire from the citizens of hell.

“Perhaps I should have thought it through?” He mused.

“Ya think?” Rosie put her tea down, “Was it worth it, at least?”

He mulled the question over. Worth it? Well, he had your soul. Which is grand. But you weren’t even in hell to be called upon. What did he really get from the deal? Alastor brought his palm to his face, already feeling the blush spreading. Rosie's chuckle didn't help. He did get something. You'd been gone a month, and each day he woke up having forgot you existed. And every night he lied down to rest and imagined your eyes staring back at him. Did he want to fight you, or surrender, when he saw that look? When the silk tie had fallen from your face, slipping down your nose to reveal your intense stare...He thought his heart had stopped. For every ounce of resilience in your voice he found a pound of fury in your gaze. What poor luck Valentino had been given to receive you as an offering.

"Too soon to tell." He leaned back, finally dropping his hand.

“Well it seemed you had a good time… not that I could see much through the green glow and all that static noise. Really spoiled the climax with that move, Alastor dear."

Alastor’s eyes were saucers, “Rosie. Are you implying-,”

“What?” She drew out the word, “I thought you weren’t into those things so of course I was curious!”

He sighed, “I’m not.”

Rosie pushed the teaspoon around her cup with one finger, “Sure looked like you were.”

He crossed his arms, indignant, “You don’t have to have an appetite to enjoy a meal.”

“Message received loud and clear dear! I won’t bring up the subject again.” She cackled and changed the topic to the latest gossip around the colony.

Another night staring at the ceiling, mind ghosting over the idea of you. He felt like he his sanity was unraveling Leaving his bed, he stepped barefoot onto the grass of the swampy forest he materialized into his room when he moved in to the hotel.

With an outstretched hand, Alastor felt for your connection. He couldn’t see it, but the weight of the chain connecting your soul to him sunk into his palm. Curious, he wrapped his fingers around the invisible links and pulled.

With a soft green glow, you rose from the grass.

His breath hitched, he hadn’t expected that. “It seems our deal really did stick, didn't it?" walking towards you, Alastor dropped to his knees at your feet. You were on your side, unmoving.

His head cocked to the left, ears turned in. Alastor crawled toward you, rolling you onto your back and opening your legs. He slotted himself there, “Hellooo,” He took your face in his both of his hands, elbows resting beside your ears, “Are you… sleeping, dear?”

This is ridiculous.

Alastor inspected your face; peaceful. It was a new sight for him, he'd really only ever seen you in some kind of rage or lost in pleasure. His hand slid down your body, realizing you were in the robe still. He laughed, but realized it was for no one. "Are you really going to sleep, hmm?" He hooked his hands under your knee and brought it up around his hip.

Nothing.

"I'm starting to get offended, dear." He leaned down and whispered into the crook of your neck. "If you don't wake up-" He slid down, the robe open enough to let his breathe ghost over your stomach. He stopped. He couldn't do anything to you while you slept. It was void of any enjoyment for him. Without your reactions, it was just....pointless. While he did enjoy your performance in the studio, he was taught to show respect for those of fairer means. A sleeping partner fell into that category.

He reached beneath you and straightened your robe that had bunched there under your body. Placing your leg back down by your ankle, he began pulling the collar up and closed it snuggly.

He stood there for a second, looking over you. It worked. You're here again. His mother had taught him that the human soul was most vulnerable at night. When asleep, the soul could wander from the body and travel earth and beyond. She even said people could train themselves, and with practice, remember their journeys even after waking.

Kneeling down, Alastor pushed your hair from your face, "Don't forget. What fun is there in that?" The shadow beneath your body shimmered neon green before you were swallowed by inky darkness and Alastor was once again, alone.

After his mother died, Alastor was often alone. Most of his time, really. Well, there were people always around. But they were staff, or hangers-on, or women looking for a comfortable life. They were dancers and bootleggers and musicians. Which was fine and grand. But, they never saw him. He never let them, they never tried. He was the radio host. The great dancer. The southern gentleman. The killer. The cannibal. The deer in the woods. Not a single person ever looked at him on earth and saw him. Which was precisely what he wanted, and manufactured with his wide smile and good manners.

So when your eyes bore into him from that tacky studio set, and he felt suddenly naked in front of you, he knew you were looking at the him. You saw him.

It was worth it. Alastor was willing to admit that to himself.

Over the next couple days, he would randomly try to pull you to him. Through out the day, in different places, he would summon your soul and wait. Nothing. It confirmed his theory, your soul was only able to leave your living body while you were asleep.

In the privacy of his room, Alastor paced the space between grass and carpet. What was this feeling? Nerves? He hadn't felt nervous since he was a child.

But, what was causing him a pause, was if he summoned you and you didn't appear. Maybe it had been a fluke? Maybe for the 7th time in 3 days he would pull on that connection and be left standing there, alone.

Still.

He ran his hands through his hair, trying to regain composure. Finally, he reached out for your ties to him, and pulled you into hell.

He held his breath, unconsciously.

With a glow, you appeared again before him. He was quick this time to approach you, setting beside you and leaning close to your face. Asleep.

"Is this my foreseeable future?" He asked, "Staring at you while you sleep, my doe."

Suddenly, you opened your eyes and met his. Reaching up, you grabbed him with both hands and pulled his face into yours. Your hands ran through his hair as you took him in a frenzied kiss. Alastor froze for a beat, but when your tongue licked at his bottom lip, he was brought back to the moment. He pushed his tongue into your mouth, rolling over yours and reaching as deep as he could. He felt like he could unhinge his jaw and swallow you whole. He really could, if he wanted to.

Alastor swung his leg over your body and straddled your hips. "Mon cher, you've finally joined me." His chest was rising and falling with excited breath.

"Alastor?" You tried to feel your body, but it was nowhere near you.

"Don't worry your pretty little head. You're still alive and well. I've merely borrowed your soul for the evening." He looked down at you, and finally, for the first time in what felt like months, your eyes fell to his face.

But today, they were soft and out of focus.

"Can you see me, my dear?" He leaned down slightly, trying to read the look on your face.

"Am I dreaming?"

He chuckled, "Perhaps we both are." With an exhale he wondered if he had been holding his breath this entire time. "No, this isn't a dream."

"I don't understand...but--," You lifted your arms towards him, "Should I say thank you? It was fucked, what happened." Your voice was slow, words a little slurred, "But, I'm home safe and sound now. You did what you promised me. I don't know if I'll ever see you again so...should I thank you now?"

Your tongue felt fat in your mouth, heavy and delayed.

Alastor leaned down over you, "You don't have to say anything." He used his knees to open your legs, and settled there. "Unfortunately, you've become a little worm in my mind." His hands slid under the silk robe you hadn't stopped wearing yet, "I'm hoping if I finally have you, I can...whet my appetite, and return to my normal self." He felt along your hips, hands stopping when he realized you were naked under the thin piece of fabric.

"I keep remembering," you covered your eyes with your hands, "that big hand of yours. And I realize, you never touched me past that."

He smiled, genuinely, truly, "Exactly! You understand the problem precisely. Shall we both have our fill and be done with it?"

You moved your hands to touch his ears, waiting for him to disappear at any moment, "Please. I'm so tired of missing someone I don't even know." He removed your hands, and you held them to your chest.

"My thoughts exactly, mon cher." He adjusted his hips, letting his crotch rub against your core. This was the closest he had been to you since you'd met. It was dizzying, and it felt like his skin was vibrating everywhere it met yours.

A soft moan left your throat, causing his cock to twitch in his pants. Yes, it was you. This wasn’t his standard response to such sounds. Alastor sat up, his legs bent and knees at either side of your hips. Taking one of your hands from your chest, he placed a kiss on a digit. Then another. He kissed his way down your arm.

“So gentle. Weird.” You tried to focus on him, but your mind was still cloudy. The sensations were here but also so far away, too far away, in another lifetime all together.

“Was I not gentle before, all things considered?,” he continued his way down your arm.

You let your eyes drift to the sky, stars watching you from above, “More than him.”

His mouth went dry at the mention of Val, "I am many things more than him, darling." As his lips found your neck, he took a deep breath. "I can actually take my time now. No audience." He sucked a bruise, and released you with a pop. He presented two fingers to your lips, and without thinking about it you began to suck them. While you were slipping your tongue over and between his fingers, he moved to continue a trail of kisses and nips down your right arm.

"Get them nice and wet." He watched through half lidded eyes as you licked his long fingers. He knew he needed to remove his hips from yours, but the idea pained him. Finally, he took his fingers from you and swiped them over your entrance. Your chest jumped, so he did it again. He tried to push the fingers into you, but the resistance was more than he expected. You were wet, but tight. He let his middle finger slip inside you. So soft. So warm. His shadow tendrils allowed him some feeling but not this, this was something they kept to themselves.

"When was your last time, mon cher?"

Your mind searched for memories still left behind in your body somewhere, "In hell."

"You're in hell now."

"This doesn't feel like hell." You ground your hips onto his palm, trying to get that single digit slowly moving in you to come deeper, to become more. He replied by pushing in his pointer finger, erection becoming painful already as you let out a little moan. Bending them up, he began to make long thrusts past your g-spot. His mouth long stilled on your arm, staring at your face as you whimpered into the sky.

"Look at me."

Your eyes darted to him, half open and wet. Alastor felt his patience snap. Undoing his belt and zipper, he finally freed his cock. He ran his head between your entrance to your clit , gathering your fluids on him to ease his entry. Taking both of your legs, he held them at the ankles and set them on his left shoulder. With your hips slightly raised, he pressed into you.

With a hiss you dug your fingers into the dirt, body tensing instinctively. One of his arms hugged your legs to his chest, the other was now bruising your hips as he continued to push into you. With just his head in, he began fast and shallow thrusts. Every time making more progress into your warmth. The stretch burned, but the feeling of him forcing space into you for himself just made you wetter.

Finally, he bottomed out. He had no sense to still himself, shallow thrusts gave way to long, deep plunges. Alastor's breathing was filling the space around you, mixing with your own. Leaning back, he looked down at where you two were connected.

He withdrew slowly, nearly entirely, and pushed back in. Again. And again. It was intoxicating, how he felt himself melt into you. He'd had lovers in life, but never had he been with someone without a barrier of some sorts. Be that his well placed smile or latex. He'd never fucked anyone raw before. He almost regretted not trying earlier, as the sensation of your walls and arousal sticking to his cock and thighs was breaking him. Watching himself entirely disappear inside you, he closed his eyes. Everything was so hot, so tight, would he disappear entirely? Would he lost in the pleasure your body was so effortlessly giving? Was he the unlucky one?

Alastor pushed your knees up to your chest, using his body weight to hold them down as his paced picked up. You brought your dirtied nails to your own legs, holding on tightly. Desperately you needed something to tether you to the ground, keep you still against the twitches shaking your stomach and chest. You felt with any jolt to your nerves you'd fall off the world and drift into the night.

He felt the build up, his balls tightening and drawing in, he wanted to slow down-- he wanted to bring you there first but he couldn't stop the rutting of his hips. With a whine, Alastor's forehead came to rest on yours, hips smacking into you with a wet slap. "Look at me," He commanded again, and you obeyed. One of his hands came to your chin to hold your head still, "Don't you dare look away."

Struggling to keep your eyes open, he pushed into you with one final, deep thrust. His hands came down now to the ground around you as he pushed you into the grass. Hips stuttering, cock twitching in you. You'd never let anyone cum inside you before, the sensation of heat quickly filling your cunt made you tighten around him. "Good girl", He purred, jaw tight.

He pulled back slowly before bringing his hips down, sweat sticking to his forehead where it met yours. His pace was quickly becoming brutal, a hand finding its way to that little bud of nerves of yours. With rough pressure and hurried speed his thumb drew out your orgasm. When you came, you gasped out his name, craning your neck up to ghost your lips over his open mouth. As the pleasure surged from your center, you could feel your body again. He tried to keep his eyes on your eyes, but the overstimulation of your cunt trying to wring him dry forced him to shut them.

A light shone through his eyelids, startling them open again.

"Wait-!" He watched you get pulled away from beneath him. Before he could react, Alastor was on all fours in the forest, alone. Eyes wide, he pounded his fist against the grass. He tried to summon you back to him, to drag you to him but nothing happened.

He thought he'd gone crazy. Hands came to his head, smile pained as he tried to process what he was feeling.

No.

Not enough.

Too soon.

A growl ripped through his chest. This hadn't satiated him at all. No, he was worse off now. He was starved, he had nourishment ripped from his mouth and he as angry for it. Angry to hell, to Valentino, to the conditions of owning a living soul.

He did not even attempt to rest that night. Taking his time, he had to find composure again. Alastor managed to pull himself together after several hours of self isolation. After his heart stopped racing, after his hands stopped feeling phantom skin beneath them, he calmed his smile and went about his day.

When night returned, he couldn't help but stare into the forest domain. He wanted so badly to bring you to himself, but that want was terrifying. It was overpowering him, and he couldn't accept that.

Another night left, another day passed. Husk found Alastor's cruelty to be growing, his patience giving out at the smallest perceived slight. Angel stopped engaging entirely. Charlie found herself wanting to approach him, find out why it seemed his hair was always standing on end, his eyes sharp. But, she didn't. She couldn't. Alastor would pass through the halls like a raging specter. He wouldn't slow or acknowledge anyone.

He managed a week. Satisfied with his resolve, he waited for when night fell and he was sure you'd be deep asleep, yanked your soul from your body and into him. He felt rabid, like he his brain was catching fire. Finally when you materialized before him, he grabbed your face with his hand.

"My doe?"

Just like before, you stirred, and your hands immediately went for his hair. He pulled back, "Are you awake?"

"Am I dreaming? Alastor?" You looked drunk, mind struggling to process the change in scenery. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he hovered above you, and you pulled him into a kiss. He happily returned it, hands quick to untie the robe you had taken as your own. He wasted now time in getting himself unsheathed and lined up with you, before he could enter you reached out to him, "I wanted to say--- thank you. I don't know if I'll ever really see you again."

The realization made his blood run cold. His mother's stories flooded back to him. It takes training, and time, to remember the travels of the wandering soul.

"You don't have to say anything." Alastor thrust into you, your body tense but not as resistant as before. When he was finally enveloped in you, he could feel himself calm. He didn't feel any need to be gentle this time around. He immediately set a bruising pace, digging his nails into the soft flesh of your ass as he forced your hips to meet his with every thrust. You gasped beneath him, eyes wandering up to the sky just past his head. He'd bring you to climax, wanting to drink in your expression, and to his horror as you choked out his name you were spirited away from him again.

Everyone on the floor heard Alastor's rampage. When Angel ran to get Charlie and Vaggie, they were scared to knock. With a steadying breath Charlie rapped the door, "Al? You okay in there?"

Suddenly, silence.

The door whipped open, Alastor smiling with half lidded eyes, "Why of course. What ever made you think otherwise?"

"The fuckin' sounds of carnage, maybe?" Angel looked past Alastor. The sofa shredded, coffee table in pieces. The wallpaper had been ripped down and torn to shreds. Charlie noticed the dirt under his nails, but Alastor coolly pulled his hands behind his back.

"Can I do something for you?" His tone was cold.

"I guess not, Al...," Charlie took in the damage, "Did something happen?"

Alastor smiled wider, "No," and closed the door. No one saw him the following day, which wasn't entirely unusual but it was weighing on Charlie. When Alastor finally appeared and announced he was going to Cannibal Town, she was elated. A chat with Rosie would surely bring him back to himself.

"I don't see the problem. You've got her soul, you can summon her to you, and you get a little," She searched for the word, "relief. Why do you look so pained, old friend?"

"You know better than most I have no interest in chasing women, Rosie."

"Yet..." She cocked her brow.

"It isn't about the release. I don't particularly need that. I never have." He huffed, the conversation already exhausting him, "When I would kill someone, I was God. Their life was in my hands. I took that power from them."

Rosie clicked her tongue, "And when she's in your hands?" Alastor hunched over his black coffee before remembering himself and straightening his back. "I've never seen you like this before, hun. You've got it bad, huh?"

"Personal connections like this, Rosie, are dangerous. I lost my self restraint entirely. It's a weakness." He fought to regain his smile, never knowing who could be passing by.

She tutted him, "Oh no, that's where you're wrong. The difference between a strong man and an unstoppable man is having something to care about." Rosie leaned over and set her hand on top of his, "Imagine you walked into Val's studio right now and found her like you did a couple months ago. How would you react?"

His stomach wretched forward, if he saw you today, hanging from the ceiling? The stench of Valentino's cigarette smoke clinging to your hair, the marks where his hands had made contact with you? His hand under her's tightened, claws leaving marks into the wooden tabletop. "Do you feel weak right now, Alastor?" The hair on his ears was standing straight up, his now black eyes met hers, "You sure don't look it."

He’d remembered hearing something similar before from Vaggie. Could it be true? It was a precarious ladder. If he let himself be close to someone, then the person is in turn close to him, then that person knows him intimately, and then— they are a walking soft spot. Someone could take them and torture them for information. Or, hurt them to hurt him.

But, who would dare? A fire rose in chest at the thought. What was the point of power if he couldn’t have what he wanted? If he had to answer to others about his desires? To pursue strength and status was what he wanted but if that strength didn’t afford him freedom than what good was it, really?

"I say, not that you asked," Rosie smiled and withdrew her hand, "Could be nice to have a little company now and then. Plus, better than waiting 60 years or something for her to just die." She shrugged, "Now, eat. You look like a shit."

Rosie had a point, while your existence was fragile, it was still available to him.

For awhile, he would call you nightly. Alastor would fuck you into the grass, beneath the trees, under the stars. He learned your orgasm would wake you, and he would draw it out as long as he could. He'd edge you for hours, watching you sob for your release. Slowly, your consciousness became more and more solid during your meetings.

To his relief, his hunger for your presence calmed over time. He could handle a week or even two without sharing your company, and he noticed each time you seemed to recognize him more. You'd participate more, moan louder, scream his name and squirm from the pleasure. He relished trapping you underneath his wide shoulders, pulling you onto his lap as he fucked up into you.

He wasn't fond of the few times he summoned you and you were already wet, or smelling of cologne. He'd tease, "Lonely?" and when he'd fuck his back cum into you before helping you chase your own orgasm, he'd remind you, "You're mine, little doe. No one can replace me." And he'd feel his chest swell. Others had your body for the night, but your soul was his forever. With every meeting, he felt more like himself. And the nights you were screaming his name in the forest, and his horns were looming over you as he marked you over and over as his, he felt powerful.

Some nights, he'd call you to him to just let you rest. He'd enjoy a book, or some jazz over a meal, while you lied quietly in his bed.

The days he pulled you into hell and your hair smelled of the trees, of sweat and dirt, he would be gentler. He could feel the ache in your muscles, the tan on your cheeks, and sent you back.

One such night came, where he of course took your chains in his hand and tugged. But this time, when you arrived, your face was painted with anger. You were asleep still, and even when he whispered to you, you didn't wake. You were having a nightmare, from what he could tell. He took you to his bed, and let you settle.

You stayed there until waking up again in your bed.

And every night that week, he'd bring you to his bed and go about his tasks while you fought some demons in your head. He'd never seen you have a nightmare, and began to wonder if something was happening in the overworld.

Alastor was enjoying a deer carcass in his room, humming softly to himself, when a green light erupted on the floor.

He was well aware it wasn't night anymore, and that he hadn't brought you here. With a soft smile, he left his meal and approached the light. Slowly, your body rose from the darkness there. Not just your soul.

When you looked up at him, a smile on your lips and two small doe ears on your head, he grinned, "Did you miss me terribly, my little doe?" He offered you a hand up, "Welcome home.”

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