I Love Hazbin Hotel But Does Anyone Else Also Feel Like It Was Fast?

Do you ever like have a really good daydream and then you start physically acting out what the characters are doing and your like kicking around on your bed all weird and then your parents open the door and look at you all weird as you scramble to pretend nothing happened like characters in a cartoon… or are you normal?

Hero tried to scramble forward on their knees but Supervillain yanked their fistful of Hero’s hair back so Hero was left straining their neck and not being able to move a muscle.

“What the fuck did you do to them?!” Hero cried out, still struggling despite every nerve in their scalp being on fire.

“I fixed them Hero. That’s what I have to do. Anything you touch you ruin. You break. You always have. Ever since we were kids,” Supervillain said wrenching Hero’s head back so Hero was forced to stare up at Supervillain. The look of pure hatred on Hero’s bloodied face was magnificent.

“Guess who has to clean up your mess everytime you fuck up? Hmm? Did you think it was just fate that kept you from the laws clutches more than once? No. I was there. In the shadows. Cleaning up every mistake. Silencing every witness. You did this, I just fixed the problem.”

Supervillain shoved Hero froward and with their hands handcuffed behind their back they had nothing to slow their fall so they jutted their shoulder out to take the impact.

They were met with the face of henchmen, staring ahead looking at nothing. “You made them love you. This is the consequence of your indulgence. Now say why.”

Hero hiccuped and shook their head, screwing their eyes shut. Even then in the darkness they could see Henchmen’s unseeing stare. The blood dried on their sallow skin.

“Say why Hero!” Supervillain yelled and Hero sobbed, memories of when their parents died surfacing and turning Hero’s stomach. A kick came to their stomach. Then their face. Then Supervillain lifted a foot and slammed in into Hero’s ribs. Hero’s eyes shot open in a silent scream as the wind was ripped from their chest. “Tell me why.”

“Because I’m unlovable,” Hero sobbed softly.

“Good. Who’s the only person who can love you, hero? Who has always been there? Stuck by your side?”

Hero looked into Supervillain’s face, so like their own. The same narrow nose, the same green eyes, the same intensity in their eyes.

“You, supervillain.”

Supervillain’s expression softened then and they nodded. They sat down and scooped Hero into their arms, running their hand down Hero’s hair as Hero sobbed into their shoulder.

“I’m sorry Hero, but it’s better this way. It’s okay. I’m here. I’m here, everything will be okay.”

“I know.”

“Good,” said Supervillain. “Good. And hero?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t disobey me again.”

Headcanon: Nahida does grabby-hands and silently asks for uppies during meetings or just when talking with the other important people of the akademiya.

All I can imagine is Al-Haitham or Cyno during a very important meeting pausing their sentence to pick up the dendro archon - the god of wisdom herself- and holding her on their hip before continuing their point

Edit: continuation

If Mr Jalapeño ever released an official instrumental album I think I would be the happiest I’ve ever been in my life (I just really want a Love In Paradise and God Games instrumental).

I need to hear what secrets this man has hidden in the instrumentals…

Prompt #333

I absolutely love hero x villain arranged marriages so seeing this as a requested really got my brain going! I’m really glad you love my writing and I hope you enjoy!

Continuation

“Sometimes, I suspect you’re happier to spend time with these weeds than you are to spend time with me.” [Super Villain]’s smile didn’t reach their eyes as they loomed over [Hero].

“Is that so hard to believe?” [Hero] said, their voice calm and flat, the fire having long turned to ice.

“Grass can’t provide for you.”

“No,” [Hero] hummed as they carefully cut the stem of the rose they had been admiring, “But I can choose whether or not to be in its company.”

“You chose to be in mine.” [Super Villain] replied, and [Hero] admired how the roses changed colors between their shadow and the sun’s light.

“Only because the alternative was worse, though somedays I wonder if that really was the case.”

[Hero] could feel [Super Villain]’s anger behind them, but they refused to turn. They long since tired of this game and long since stopped wondering if [Super Villain]’s threats held weight.

“You will be happy with me.” [Super Villain] growled before they stalked away, leaving [Hero] to decide if that was a threat or a promise.

"Honey?" [Villain] leaned on the window frame.

"Go away." [Hero] grumbled. "I 'cheated' on you. Remember?"

"No, that was [Civilian]'s heart you squashed." [Villain] snorted, caressing the poor hero's face. "When I wear this costume, I'm your secret criminal lover. The one you made out with in the parking lot."

"Shut up!"

"They're never going to let you out of this cell, knowing who you are." [Villain] pouted. "It's nearly impossible for anyone to look at you the same way again."

"I wish you could've just broke up with me instead of resorting to such low tactics." [Hero] mumbled. "It's not working, I'm not coming to join you so easily."

"Pumpkin, you're going to end up being a villain either way." Their lover laughed. "Whether you come crying back into my arms or not, I'm going to love seeing you turn into a monster."

Is camp halfblood a cult?

I will say, while I do enjoy enough of Percy Jackson books… I think I prefer the fanfictions that take that world and lean into the darker parts of it.

I really enjoy fanfics I find that have the gods be more… godly I guess. The gods in PJO just feel too much like regular people. Like just annoying people. Also they just suck in general… Luke was an asshole but I kinda get why he was doing it you know? They are fucking gods. They can’t like make sure they’re kids don’t have to struggle and fight just to fucking exist??

I will say, I live for fanfiction where Percy ascends even if he didn’t choose to. Beautiful and tragic and honestly with the shit Percy does thats all I can see happening.

Another thing i enjoy in PJO fanfiction is when it becomes critical of certain characters (if you like Annabeth Chase and Percabeth please leave) and of camp half-blood and camp Jupiter. I cannot stress this enough, those camps are cults making child soldiers. They are not a safe space. They are cults training children to willingly sacrifice themselves for their parents who don’t give a flying shit about them. Chiron literally looked over the fact Percy could have died in that capture the flag game. Camp Halfblood sent out a kid with the like 0 training to go on a death quest just because his father got accused of a damn crime, and they sent him with the girl who nearly gor him fucking killed (Im so sorry I don’t like Annabeth). Camp Jupiter is so much worse because Im sorry??? There are adults??? Why are the children the military??? Thats not even mentioning the fact that so many of these kids are year rounders. They don’t have an actual home to go back to. Thats terrifying, they are stuck in these fucking death camps. Once again, no wonder there are kids who joined Kronos’ army. Not a good thing but I kinda fucking get it.

Also oh my god Percabeth. I love Annabeth bashing fics. Those feed my soul. I don’t care much for Annabeth Chase. She’s interesting but she’s also fucking shit. She beats Percy everytime she gets and is praised for every shitty thing she does and I hate that so fucking much. Im actually so scared for Leah because when people start putting together how shit Annabeth is as PJO get adapted into shows Im so scared she’ll get the brunt of all the problems when it was just how her character was horribly written. Fandom made Percabeth cuter and healthier then they actually are in canon (she didn’t know his Achilles curse was gone yet judo flipped him. Percy. Could. Have. Died.)

Anyway… anyone have recommendations for any fics that lean into the more fucked up side of these books? I’d love to hear it

Dear Closeted People On Tumblr...

How do I pretend to be straight?

What do straight people talk about? How do I sit properly? How do I make it seem like I'm not distracted by a girl's beauty and I am indeed enchanted by the non-existing handsomeness of a boy? How does one breath in a gay panic?

Prompt 138

The dripping water from the leaky cell roof was the only way of telling time. By Hero’s estimate, three to four weeks had passed. Blindfolded and bound in the dark, Hero yearned for the sound of someone’s voice, or even a gentle touch. They missed their home. Bed. Lover. In hindsight, the break-up should never have happened. On again, off again… why had it taken Villain capturing them to realize how they belonged together? Their life was always better with Lover.

Villain watched through cameras from two floors above, taking special note of Hero’s hiccups and silent sobs. Now was as good a time as any. They rushed downstairs. Showtime.

“Hero!” they gasped, flinging open the door. “I can’t believe I finally found you.”

Hero resisted the urge to thrash at the familiar voice. They had to be hallucinating. Isolation had finally gotten to them. Unless… “Lover?”

“Don’t worry babe, I’ll get you out.” Villain ripped at the ropes, careful to only use a civilian’s level of strength.

Sobs tore from Hero’s throat. “Lover, I was so scared. Villain captured me right after we broke up and they left me here alone-” they threw their arms around their rescuer’s neck. Lover had come for them- even when there was no reason to. “I’m sorry. For everything.” Hero gasped, clutching at their lifeline. “I love you.”

Perfect. Villain smiled “I know.” they murmured, stroking the top of Hero’s head.

From the way Hero was talking, Villain didn’t think it would be a battle to get them to move back in. They belonged together. And if Hero forgot again… This punishment had been effective. Very effective.

Effective enough to try again.

The Chosen One Troupe

I'm always wondering why most writers I see always have a very similar why of going around with this troupe. Think of all the possibilities:

They could be a literal war criminal who has killed thousands of people

They could be a tired college student who doesn't want to deal with this bullshit

Could be fucking married to the bad guy they're meant to kill and just go all "nah"

A gen z who is done with life

Could just die and those prophecy reading dunderheads were looking for the wrong fucking person

All the stupid possibilities