I LOVE THEM. WITH MY WHOLE HEART AND LIVER.

ULYSSES DIES AT DAWN! AT LEAST, THAT’S THE WORD ON THE STREET FROM THOSE WHAT SAW WHAT WENT DOWN AT CALYPSO’S. NOW LISTEN UP, 'CAUSE WE’VE GOT A LABYRINTHINE TWISTED TASK OF A TALE TO TELL, AND IF YOU DON’T KEEP UP, YOU MIGHT GET LOST. FIRST, TO UNDERSTAND HOW THIS ALL GOES DOWN, YOU’VE GOT TO KNOW A LITTLE ABOUT THE PLANET WE’RE TALKING OF. SEE, ON THIS PLANET, THERE WAS A CITY, GRIM OLD CITY, SORT OF PLACE THE RAIN BEATS DOWN LIKE COFFIN NAILS AND THE AIR WAFTS WITH THE CIGARETTE STENCH OF BETRAYAL. MY KIND OF TOWN. NOW THIS CITY, GRIM OLD CITY, IT STARTS TO GROW. AND WHEN IT MEETS WITH OTHER TOWNS, OTHER CITIES, IT TAKES THEM INTO ITSELF, ABSORBS THEM, UNTIL SOON ENOUGH THERE’S NO LAND LEFT, SO THE CITY SPREADS OUTWARDS INTO THE SEA, AND WHEN THERE’S NO SEA LEFT, THE CITY SPREADS UPWARDS INTO THE SKY, AND WHEN THERE IS NO SKY LEFT… IT BURROWS INWARDS. LIKE A CANCER INTO THE BOWELS OF THE PLANET. AND EVENTUALLY, THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE CITY. AND SO GENERATIONS LIVE AND GENERATIONS DIE IN THE WARRENS AND THE TUNNELS AND EVEN THE LOWER LEVELS OF THE SURFACE, AND THEY NEVER SEE THE SUN. AND IT’S IN ONE OF THE DEEPEST, MOST SECRET OF THESE TUNNELS WE MEET OUR HERO. GOES BY THE NAME OF ULYSSES. CURRENTLY BEATEN, BATTERED, BLOODY. UNBOWED. SPITS OUT A MOUTHFUL OF TEETH AND DISDAIN AND LOOKS UP TO SEE FOUR OF THE MEANEST BASTARDS OF THE MEANEST STREETS OF THE MEANEST PARTS OF THE CITY. ALL IMMACULATELY TURNED OUT IN PINSTRIPES. WE’LL CALL THEM THE SUITS. YOU MIGHT ASK HOW THINGS CAME TO SUCH A PASS—I KNOW ULYSSES IS. WELL, IT STARTED IN A BAR, AS THESE THINGS SO OFTEN DO. CALYPSO’S—A RUN DOWN OLD GIN JOINT, PAYS ITS MONEY TO DIONYSUS—OUR HERO SLUMPED OVER A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY, TRYING TO DROWN ENOUGH SORROWS TO CHOKE A HORSE. AND ONE HORSE IN PARTICULAR.

[ID: Two people. One of them has an arm wrapped around the other's shoulder and is shouting and gesturing. The other one stares off expressionless. End ID]

self care is putting off the mission where u rescue micah from strawberry for as long as humanly possible

You know, I don't think I've ever met someone who doesn't like Spock. And that is exactly what he deserves. 🖖

Fellas, is it gay if we're both star trek characters?

Mechtober 2024 Day 14: Alternate Universe

AU where scorpions mind their own business

Important Advice from Too-Ticky:

I think that Dr. Pilchard is bald

me the whole day: "that's it, I'm shifting tonight!"

me later in the evening, after completing the first step of my method:

I want someone to be my stars and I want someone to be my night why can't I have what they have

I wish gay people were real and not just made up for hit 2010s steampunk cabaret band The Mechanisms 😔