@alamoody

Give. Even when you know you can get nothing back.

Yasmin Mogahed   (via wordsnquotes)

@frxnkislong​

@frxnkislong

PARKS AND RECREATION Season 3 Episode 14 “The Fight”

vancexemme​:

alamoody​:

Alastor listened intently, making note of every detail. Maybe it wouldn’t have been flint who was the man, but it would be a lead to follow on just in case, and leads even if they didn’t lead to the answer they want it always could have the potential to reveal other things. He could tell Emmeline was taking it seriously, giving extreme detail while telling it in a way that felt more clinical than emotional. It was always to go through these with that attitude, especially when it was so fresh the emotions still needing to be processed and if exposed risked reliving it a bit too closely. It was all very standard for now, he knew about what Dorcas had done and he couldn’t put any blame on her for wanting to break Emmeline out. If he had the opportunity to have saved her from what she would have to go through, he knew his emotion would hold some sway and he’d wish to do it too. Yet, Emmeline kept a cool head and probably did what was the best thing for everyone, but her. He was proud of the action even if he felt deeply guilty about where it leads her.

He had just been about caught up, adding small notes that he could make connections to later when Emmeline’s voice had stopped and her stare lingered on him. Alastor lifted the quill removing it from the paper, allowing her a break from the sound. In addition, he made a note to write slower and with less pressure, though he knew his control on that might decrease as they got to the more gruesome details.  Alice had taken it upon herself to ask questions, she’d grown so nicely into her role. She was an excellent Auror and she asked questions that he stood behind, though he didn’t know if she was asking for all the same reasons he would. Alastor never shared his thoughts on Dorcas’ involvement with that death, figuring the suspicion then confirmation was better kept quiet. It was safer for Dorcas the fewer people that knew.  It was probably obvious that the order would be thought of in his death, even if he had enemies made on his own, the enemy would be the first one to come to mind.

Although Emmeline’s eyes had been trained on him just moments ago, as she spoke now it seemed she wouldn’t be able to meet his gaze.  It was probably better that she didn’t, his eyes and facial expression could never express the comfort she would need for this. As much as he tried to take a break to ease her, he had to get back to writing it was too important now to miss any details here, and honestly, he didn’t want to spend the evening trying to remember the cruelties done. It’d be something too hard, he would already have to go through this enough, and adding to it just felt so disheartening. Emmeline was practically a daughter and she’d gone through something horrific, she was a brave girl, but it wasn’t anything she deserved.  His grip tightened as she went into what Bellatrix had done, having to remind himself to loosen it to prevent the noises for Emmeline.  At Alice’s question, he nodded in agreement. “ Yes, do you think they have any reason to believe he’d been the one to let you out?” He added, finally speaking up since the beginning. He knew it was technically skipping a big chunk, but it was relevant and would do good to know in case the young boy would need extra protection.

@vancexemme​

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The questions provided a much needed pause, letting Emmeline take a step back from her memories in order to answer them. Her voice was still clear and precise and Whiskers hid the shaking of her hands easily with his long fur and insistent requests to be pet. She had only gone through the first day of ten so she knew it was no great feat to have not broken down yet, but she had set her jaw and looked up steadily at Alice’s questions. 

“I don’t think she’s sure,” She answered, “It felt like she was throwing it out hoping to get some reaction to see if she was looking in the right direction.” The mind of Bellatrix wasn’t one she’d be confident in picking apart, but she could at least provide this much, to describe the reckless toss of questions instead of out Dorcas for what she had done. 

At the mention of them suspecting Regulus, she shook her head. Emmeline at least felt confident in Regulus. He was smart and quiet, and she had a feeling if his relatives had caught any whiff of the visits they would have put an end to it immediately or come down with him. “No, he was very careful about it, and then he was gone for a few days. I don’t think they even knew he was over at the house the day we left.” It might be smart to ask Regulus more, she couldn’t vouch for his behavior prior to seeing him again and if he was as honest faced as he’d been with her downstairs it might be smart to keep their protection of him a secret. “You should speak with him, if you can do so without frightening him. He’s going through a lot at the moment.” 

Content that they had the answers they needed, she slipped into describing the second day. “The second day was…different. She asked me the same questions, really, and again I didn’t say anything. She would threaten things, tell me she would peel my skin off or make me eat one of my eyes. She didn’t use any spells on the second day, just some knives she seemed pretty partial to. She stabbed my shoulder, my left arm, and my left thigh. Then she would just cut me in smaller places, still asking me the same questions over and over, and if I was quiet, she’d cut me more.” 

@alicelxngbottom​

...

Alice tried to keep her face neutral as Emmeline continued to tell them of her time in the Lestrange basement, desperate to keep the emotions raging within from overpowering her. Alice had been an Auror for nearly ten years now, she should be used to this sort of thing. And in reality, she was. She had sat in on debriefs far worse than this and been able to turn off the emotional part of her to do the work that needed to be done. In fact, she had done it many times. But there was something about this that made it difficult to do that. She felt none of the usual cool, calm, clinical control that she usually felt in these situations. She couldn’t seem to separate her feelings from the work in front of her. 

Maybe it was the pregnancy, which would be the easiest thing to blame. After all, she was a mess of raging hormones and maternal instinct. Very few women in her position would be able to hear of these atrocities while feeling their child move beneath them. It was just a horrible sick reminder that she was bringing an innocent, defenseless child into the world in the middle of a war. But Alice knew that it was more than just the emotions of a pregnant woman. She loved each of her Aurors, but there was something about the Order members that moved her heart in a deeper way. Not only were they family to Alice, but she was keenly aware of how young most of them were. At least her Aurors weren’t sent into the field until they had proved themselves capable through three years of training. These Order members didn’t have that; they were still children. 

And looking at Emmeline now, Alice was struck with how young and vulnerable she looked. Of course Emmeline was incredibly strong and brave after everything she had been through; most would have broken in that situation and given their torturers the information they were looking for. But strong and brave or not, no one that young should have to go through what Emmeline had suffered. Alice didn’t often feel hopeless like this, but she couldn’t help wondering whether this was all worth it. How many more people that she cared about would be hurt or murdered before this was all over? And how could she bear to let any of them leave on mission knowing that this sort of thing was a possibility? 

@alamoody​

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