I got the brilliant idea for this short excerpt after listening to one of my favorite songs.
This excerpt is a piece of Aito’s lore, where he lost someone he loved dearly due to his lack of acceptance for himself.
Edit note: This specific excerpt is set in 19th century England (Aito is hundreds of years old) (that’s a whole other piece of lore but whatever)
“Do you love me?”
It was morning, and the sun peeked through the drawn curtains onto his tanned face and reflected in his eyes, making them shine like a swirled caramel. I sat on the edge of the bed, in my nude, and he laid behind me with his cheek propped on his hand and the sheets covering his lower body.
I looked at him, a mild visage of bewilderment on my face. I gave a scoff as I stood and grabbed my shirt off the nearby chair. “I just had sex with you. Why wouldn’t I?”
I felt his fingers trace down my spine and stop above my rear, then he placed his hand on my lower back. I shivered as I began buttoning my white shirt.
“I don’t know. You just felt…distant the whole time,” he said softly. He tugged at the back of my shirt, and I turned to face him after I picked up my tie.
“How so?” I asked, looking down at him as I straightened the black tie around my neck.
He slipped the covers off himself and sat off the edge of the bed in front of me. My eyes traced his figure as he looked up. He ran his hands up the sides of my thighs and stopped at my hips, massaging them. “You just looked…apathetic the whole time. As if you weren’t enjoying it.” His eyes would flit up my body, and I inhaled sharply as he ran his hands down my front. I swallowed hard and slipped my trembling fingers into his messy black hair, although gingerly.
His hands rested on the backs of my thighs as he looked up at me again, a faint, pained expression on his face. His hands dropped and clasped in his lap as he pressed his forehead into my stomach. “That. You’re hesitant. Why?”
I stared down at him, then dropped my hands as well. I felt a vise grip my chest, and I opened my mouth to speak, then closed it. After a moment, he raised his head and eyed at me expectantly. I exhaled deeply and closed my eyes. “I…I don’t know.”
I did know. But I hated that I knew. I knew it was because I still couldn’t fully approve of all the love I wanted to give.
I opened my eyes, and his expression was one of unconvinced hurt.
Gently, he placed his hands on my hips and pushed me a step back. He stood and tilted his head up at me, his voice breaking. “You hurt me so. You can’t even say you love me back.”
My breath hitched in my throat, and I stared at him silently. I felt my eyes begin to sting and gloss over.
“Cry for me,” he challenged, although it came out more as a quiet, choked beg.
I blinked away my tears.
This 7th of May, 2025, we use our own language again!
If your language, native or not, is something other than English, on May 7th you can speak that language all day!
You’ll blog in your chosen language(s) all day: text posts, replies, tags (except triggers and organisational tags).
Regardless of what language people choose to speak to you, you can answer in your own.
Non-verbal, non-written languages (like sign language and dialects) are more than welcome! See my FAQ for tips
English native speakers can participate in any other language they're studying/have studied/know.
The tag is gonna be #Speak Your Language Day or #spyld for short.
Please submit me some language facts for me to share on this day <3
Pinned post and FAQ
The only good thing from all of this is that now I have an in-depth understanding of the dynamics that create this kind of situation, which is kind-of a must for Evil Government TM. Easily the worst way to get an in-depth understanding of that but...
I have a foolproof strategy for worldbuilding these days (as an American):
Step 1: Wait for Trump/MAGA to do something stupid and perform insane levels of Orwellian double-think to justify it.
Step 2: Write it down and change the names around.
Happy Worldbuilding Wednesday! Where in your setting would you most like to visit, and where would you avoid at all costs?
This is an interesting question! And a really rough one, haha.
For one, it would definitely vary in the time period / exact moment in time regardless of the location, haha. But I'll pick from overall time periods! (And assume I can easily speak the native language.)
For those who don't know the countries in my world, check this out!
Haha, sooooo I technically have a tie here??? And both technically wouldn't work for one reason or another. 😂😅
Minogua is a country that's drawn a lot of inspiration from Latin America + Hawaii and, uh... well previously had a lot of themes of colonialism. That's why it feels a little rough to want to go there as a kinda tourist, haha.
But! Shortly before the time of RFtA, they evicted the direct authority from the colonizing countries! So by the time the story comes around, they've had a few decades of trying to turn their country into what they want it to be / what it was before they were invaded!
I grew up both in Texas (there's a LOT of Mexican people and influences there!) and Florida (near-tropical and has a lot of Puerto Rican people / influences!). I may not be Latina, but two of my closest friends are (and one is now my gf 😂) and I have a lot of positive experiences relating to the culture. I think that's a huge reason for my fondness for Minogua and Tzakah, haha.
Besides that, as I (hopefully) alluded to, Minogua is also a tropical country! It's got a rich, surprisingly friendly culture and I'd absolutely love visiting it on holiday. It just... would feel wrong due to the whole "colonization" history, haha. 😅
To be fair, I don't think a majority of them would mind it. But it's only been a few decades since they got rid of the direct authority of the colonizing country, so other people exploiting their history for their own "entertainment" would definitely not rub some of them the right way!
The real place I'd most like to go... if I'd even be able to remember the experience!!! 😭😭😭
So, the problem with Tzakah is that they're kinda hidden! They're actually a massive city built into a seaside cliff in Cirrane's rainforest as well as an isolationist "country" (read: city-state) with no connection to the rest of the world!
See, there's two ways to go if you'd like to leave or enter Tzakah: through the forest or by the sea. Only... there's a couple problems with that.
Go by sea, and there's practically endless storms raging off the coast. And not just your average nasty equatorial storms--but hurricane-type stuff! Not close enough to bother Tzakans, and actually not even permanent! But any time anyone goes near that approximate area of the world, knowingly or not, storms begin to barrage them until it destroys their ship or they (wisely) flee the area.
Many around the world refer to that area "the Gods' Land", theorizing that the gods' home is past the storms and the storms themselves are meant to keep out all but those who are worthy.
Making the storms "the Gods' Trials", of course.
Tzakah is lucky to just barely be at the edge of the Gods' Land, managing to avoid the Trials even when they go out to sea for fish. Besides that, they don't travel much further--they learned a long time ago of the dangers associated with it.
On the other side, they have the rainforest. And, somehow, it's worse.
Beyond the usual dangers of wild nature, Cirrane's rainforest is known to be haunted by malicious spirits--theorized to both be faerie in origin and those of deceased victims--that kill all who encroach on their territory.
Those who wander too far into the forest are known to never come back. Most--the Cirranians on the other side of the rainforest--don't know exactly why people who wander into the forest disappear. Again, they just theorize it's spirits--they don't know for sure. All they do is that they should never go past a certain landmark in the forest... lest they never be heard of again.
Those of Tzakah, however, know of the "spirits" by name.
The Melijé.
Merciless hunters they're locked into perpetual war with, and will be forever until the end of time... or until one finishes the other off.
Why?
Well, for the horrible crime of having left the Melijé centuries ago!
Anyway, yeah! Tzakah is a safe haven hidden in-between the Gods' Trials and the Melijé haunting the forests of {insert forest name here, probably sounding vaguely like "Melijé"}. Uh, I've definitely named the forest, don't worry! I'm just too lazy to look it up! Yeah...
Tzakah was formed by refugees who fled from the Melijé long ago. They're a peaceful people--descended from those who hated the Melijé's violent and hateful ways--and have created a completely pacifistic utopian society for themselves... outside of a select group of warriors who've trained under Torcaiz (their god of Protection) to repel any Melijé attacks. However, they're all warned of the struggles and pain associated with it beforehand, and accept the burden.
The people of Tzakah are isolationists due to the whole "actually kinda separated from the rest of the world" thing, and... another piece of their history that makes them see the rest of the world as a much darker place than their utopia. (Which obviously is fair. I mean, have you seen most of my worldbuilding??? It's bad.)
However... that Very Purposely Ambiguous "Piece Of History™" has also made Tzakans cautious of the very few outsiders that do make it there. (There's a few ways, but it's mostly them rescuing people who got lost in the rainforest before the Melijé kills them... or idiots who try to sail through the Gods' Trials, thinking they're "worthy".)
Instead of welcoming outsiders in with open arms like they'd want to (but they pretty much still do--), they're more cautious of and careful with them. Outsiders tend to get questioned by one of Tzakah's gods--usually Torcaiz alongside one of the others to keep him from deeming them all "unworthy" 🤣--to verify they don't have any ulterior motives.
And then, if and when they leave... they're stripped of their memories of their time there.
Yeah. Another one of the Tzakan gods--Marmorin--is able to completely remove people's memories. Except... he doesn't 99% of the time. Instead, he messes with the memories to "repress" them--leaving the effects of their time in Tzakah, but making it so, at best, they'll remember it as a dream.
Soooooo... if I were to ever visit Tzakah, I'd first have to put my life at risk and then be forced to lose my memory of my time there, anyway!
Haha, definitely not worth it, unfortunately.
In spite of all of that, Tzakah is an awesome place to visit. Like Cirrane (which the Melijé was once associated with) and Minogua, Tzakah has strong Latin American influence! They're in the middle of a rainforest, but obviously completely locked within the "city" itself!
(There's always at least one Melijé huntress patrolling the woods outside of Tzakah. Their rivalry is bitter, harbored and continued mostly by the Melijé, and one of Torcaiz's jobs as their god of Protection is maintaining a barrier that keeps the Melijé out.)
Again, their culture is very utopian, with most everyone being incredibly supportive of one another and each others' problems. The few who don't feel that way are instead given space and patience to do whatever they wish. Many of which eventually become (or already were) Warriors and develop a solidarity with the others, or leave Tzakah under the watchful eye of another god...
(To anyone wondering, the Melijé aren't any sort of "native peoples are inherently violent" thing or whatever. They're actually in the minority being that way in my story! Most of the time--like with Minogua--it's the opposite. Native peoples just want to be left alone. The Melijé's history actually separates them from most indigenous groups, tbh. Send an ask if you want to know more about them or Tzakah in general! Though please specify what specifically you want to know more about...)
Aaaand on the other end of the rainforest is CIRRANE! (Somehow there happens to be both a utopia and dystopia separated by nothing but a rainforest, some magical nonsense, and a ravaging cult bent on destruction of all others and growing their own power...)
I've spoken about Cirrane before, but it's definitely scattered across posts, haha. Long story short? Since this post has been LONG--
Cirrane is an incredibly impoverished nation with a massive wage gap and next to no middle class. Their way of "solving" that?
Bread and circuses!
... no, I mean it. Almost literally--
Context! The origin of the term "bread and circuses" to placate the masses is actually from Ancient Rome, where they'd use food ("bread") and entertainment ("circuses", which originally referred to what are now called coliseums)!
So... want to guess what Cirrane does?
Yeah, so, basically people have the option to risk their lives by fighting in arenas / coliseums to raise their status. Likewise, it's incredibly cheap to buy into and watch them! Lowkey, their entire economy is based around the arenas and the whole "political structure" around them.
Even the current monarch has fought in the coliseums before!
(In order to display their sheer magical prowess to the masses and intimidate them into falling in line.)
Similarly, Cirrane is known to be a debt-trap country, which will often try to entice people (but especially outsiders) into gambling... and using that to hook them into the many available vices.
Oh, and btw? It's VERY relevant in Rising From the Ashes! 🥰
Yeah, so, you'd really think it would've been Glavnran, but no. Somehow, as bad as Glavnran is, Cirrane is worse.
(PS: "Melijé" is pronounced "Mehl-ee-hey")
Worldbuilding tag list: @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet @illarian-rambling @ashirisu @urnumber1star
@the-letterbox-archives @48lexr @aalinaaaaaa @paeliae-occasionally (Ask and ye shall be added)
one of the funniest things I see people say about "standard english" btw is californians who are like "yeah basically all american english speakers speak the same way so it makes sense to call that 'standard american english'" because you know they only perceive it that way because californian english has like every single vowel merger simultaneously so they can't tell the difference between other american english varieties. they're fish who don't know they're wet
Yeah, I for sure meant a little both to encourage reading your works but also I probably misread a little?
Like, I think what I said still mostly applies but in a different way than I meant it, for sure? (Well, maybe not my first sentence; looking back that reads completely unrelated honestly.)
sometimes i feel like a bigshot mass media company when i purposely exclude important details from “the advertising” to help hide spoilers lol
I keep doubting I can find nicher fandoms but here we are. does anybody want to talk about ZeWei and Laghari Portals
Dear Tumblr,
Today I finished my novel. I don't mean that I got the first draft done. I mean that I, recently sixteen, finished the novel that I've been working on for as long as I can remember. I did it.
I am very happy and I just wanted to share it with all the weird little freaks that inspired me to put my blorbos down on paper. I don't care if nobody sees this. I did it. I am a writer. I finished my book.
Love,
Avi
"Rationalism" is up there with "Objectivism" in terms of "definitionally funny things to call your own belief system".
they/themConlanging, Historical Linguistics, Worldbuilding, Writing, and Music stuffENG/ESP/CMN aka English/Español/中文(普通话)
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